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Lost My Spouse...

Members: 387
Latest Activity: Oct 5, 2022

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Lost my husband the father of my kids and bestfriend . 6 Replies

  I lost my husband we were high school sweethearts we had plans and it was not suppose to be this way we had two kids together and I feel so lost and the pain i feel becuase of how much I miss him…Continue

Started by Nicole. Last reply by Martha Washburn Sep 22, 2022.

Loss of spouse… 3 Replies

For 40+ years we were together…married 39 years….We were to celebrate our 40th anniversary…Nobody who hasn’t been married, and lost a spouse could possibly understand….even though he was into many…Continue

Started by Susan B. Last reply by Connie Sep 1, 2022.

Today is the anniversary of my wedding day 2 Replies

I got married on May 1, 1992 and lost my husband on June 30, 2017. My wedding day was the happiest day of my life and if I had one wish, it would be to go back and live that day over. It has been…Continue

Started by Carol Klotz. Last reply by Carol Klotz May 3, 2020.

Lost my light in the darkness 2 Replies

I lost my wife on the 25 of March after returning from my Dads funeral. She is everything to me. No matter how bad it got, no matter how much my PTSD drug me down, She has been my light in the…Continue

Started by Shane Hughes. Last reply by Shane Hughes Apr 16, 2020.

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Comment by Linda Engberg on June 4, 2018 at 2:50pm

Hi L.O.

I know it is really hard to live without your Husband, we didn't have kids so that makes it worst, I have nothing left except my sweet little dog Babie J who is 13 years old and not doing well. So now I have to watch her suffer like I did my Husband. I really don't live in this world anymore, I just exist. 

Regards, Linda

Comment by L.O on June 4, 2018 at 1:03pm

I don't think i can cope anymore, i thought i was doing ok but im in bits. Im in pain all over but the drs cant find anything wrong, i miss him so much that the thought of never seeing him or even hearing his voice again is killing me. Iv been out to see old friends thinking this would help keep my mind busy but i still sleep alone, im still alone when the kids go to bed, the last one awake, the only one there for the kids. I don't how some of you have gone years when iv only gone a few months

Comment by Trina Mamoon on May 20, 2018 at 3:46pm

Beautiful, Linda! 

Comment by Nancy on May 20, 2018 at 11:33am

Love it. 

Comment by Linda Engberg on May 20, 2018 at 11:28am

Oops, forgot the picture 

Comment by Linda Engberg on May 20, 2018 at 11:26am

To all on this site.

This is hanging above my stove. Everyone of us had a royal wedding.

Comment by JenShep on May 20, 2018 at 9:22am

Alice, I totally understand what you’re expressing and I feel the same way although my certainty waxes and wanes. Sometimes I feel so good because I know he’s right here with me and sometimes I can’t feel it and sink back down into hell again. I’ve had a few amazing experiences where I’ve actually felt Tom climb in bed and wrap himself around me. I’ve heard him trying to talk to me - HIS voice. And then months will go by with nothing except my own “feeling” that he’s here. Or worse, my feeling that he’s not. I try the same thing - to push my thoughts to how things are now instead of the physical him that I am missing but it’s still so hard. I keep trying to learn to communicate with him. I meditate. I’ve tried Reiki. I’m just going to keep trying. Probably I’ll keep getting frustrated and sad but I feel like all I can do is keep trying. I guess I’ll just keep having the ups and downs. I just hope to get better at feeling him here. I wish I had been born with the ability like some seem to have been. I feel like my mission now while I’m still here is to learn to do this. 

Comment by Trina Mamoon on May 19, 2018 at 5:19pm

The royal wedding evoked similar feelings for me as John T. Joseph and I loved watching PBS shows, especially Masterpiece and Mystery, and we watched together the coverage of Princess Diana's tragic death and Prince William And Kate's wedding. So when Prince Harry shed tears, presumably, for his late mother I couldn't stop crying myself. It brought back anew so many memories with Joseph, our idyllic time together for 19 blessed years. I have reconciled myself to living out my life to its natural end. I pray every single day for my early death, but I can not take my own life: apart from being a woman of faith, I also can't subject my family to the kind of grief it would cause if I were to end my own life. Alas, I will have to go on living without my darling Joseph at my side. Please God, let it be soon.

The wedding was very moving. And like morgan, I, too, wish the royal couple much happiness and a long life together. May they know the kind of love that we, on this site, have known with our spouses.

Comment by John T. on May 19, 2018 at 2:49pm

It was when they sang "Stand By Me" that I turned it off.  I never heard that song presented in that way and suddenly the words had profound meaning.  Then I started thinking how much my wife would have loved watching the wedding and how we would have talked about everything that happened.  We were true anglophiles and I can't even watch the British programs on PBS anymore.  There is no one to share them with and they only make me even more aware of her not being here with me.  I've read this will pass.  I'm not holding my breath.

Comment by Nancy on May 19, 2018 at 2:06pm

I feel the very same Morgan.  I had a love affair for 43 years.  We have 3 children who are still devastated but would be completely paralyzed if I did something like you are talking about.  I will bear this pain and remain alone for the sake of my kids and grandkids.  They hurt enough.  Please think things through.  I know exactly how much you hurt.

 

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