Pamela philipp
  • Female
  • Hobart, IN
  • United States
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Understanding grief
10 Replies

There has been things on this site I understand and some things I don't however with that being said here is my opinion on recent things I have read about grief I lost my mother and my husband within…Continue

Started this discussion. Last reply by JO B Jan 24.

At the end of my rope
2 Replies

I don't know if I can go on much longer the pain is so excruciating it's getting harder each day it's coming up on 15 months since my husband passed away from cancer and I am having trouble sleeping…Continue

Started this discussion. Last reply by bluebird Dec 6, 2016.

Why does everyone say that things will get easier?
6 Replies

I don't understand why people keep telling me that things are going to get easier when people ask me how I am like a friend of mine that I've been friends with for over 30 years she lost her husband…Continue

Started this discussion. Last reply by annjulie Dec 7, 2016.

Feeling more lost than ever
5 Replies

It's been just a little over a year since my mom and my husband passed I've had no contact with my family because obviously they think I'm fine it's funny how when you lose somebody you find out…Continue

Started this discussion. Last reply by ShingingLight1967 Nov 20, 2016.

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Pamela philipp's Page

Latest Activity

Michael replied to Pamela philipp's discussion Stupid cancer commercials in the group Losing Someone to Cancer
"The pharmaceutical thieves have to make their billions.Modern science drug companies don't want you to hear the truth about the side effects conventional methods produce.  "
May 7
Pamela philipp replied to Kevin Bailey's discussion Move on? in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Thankyou Kevin I appreciate that a lot this is why I like this site hope you have a good day thanks again"
Mar 30
Pamela philipp replied to Kevin Bailey's discussion Move on? in the group Lost My Spouse...
"I don't understand why people think that time makes things easier or better it's been 18 months since I lost my mother 9-6-15 and my husband 9-14-15 it's just getting worse plus the fact that my so called friends and family…"
Mar 29
JO B replied to Pamela philipp's discussion Understanding grief
"no 1 gets it till it hapens 2 thm thn thy dnt get it still evn i dnt deep in me all i say s whu why why why i ask am i a nasty persn i do  is t my falt i ask i do i ask a 1000000000000000000000000 qus or mor evry day i do"
Jan 24
Pamela philipp replied to Maxey's discussion Comfort in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Maxey I absolutely understand how you feel my so called family and friends stopped talking to me after my husbands memorial service I guess they think I should be fine by now because it's been 16 months and I guess they think I should just be…"
Jan 16
Pamela philipp commented on Brenda Ann's group Has your faith been tested or lost with the death of your loved one?
"I don't know if I have actually lost faith in God I just don't understand before the loss of my mother and the loss of my husband a week apart I would say I was extremely faithful in God I remember sitting with my husband reading passages…"
Jan 13
Pamela philipp replied to brenda mcintyre's discussion lost in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Brenda first I am truly sorry for your loss my children are grown as well my daughter moved out of state just a few months before my husband passed he passed in September of 2015 Life has not been the same since there isn't a day that goes by…"
Jan 13
bluebird replied to Pamela philipp's discussion Understanding grief
"You are very welcome, Pamela. {{{{{{hugs}}}}}}"
Jan 12
Pamela philipp replied to Pamela philipp's discussion Understanding grief
"Thankyou bluebird I appreciate what you said and you are right"
Jan 12
JO B replied to Pamela philipp's discussion Understanding grief
"thnx my cat of 16 yrs wz mor undstanin thn humens cud be i wud cry on her fur wen my dad died she wud lic me is 2 say sorry humn mom shes gon now iv 2 new kittys i luv dealy i do 2  iv noted cats dogs seam 2 hav mor hume humenn fealins thn…"
Jan 12
AnneJ replied to Pamela philipp's discussion Understanding grief
"Jo, I read and listened to you as you went through the sadness of knowing your good companion, your kitty, was going to pass away. I have a guy like that, too. He's a big, old, male cat who has kept me company for these last years and I pretend…"
Jan 12
JO B replied to Pamela philipp's discussion Understanding grief
"all i no i i wish i cud run 2 go s wear wear no 1 can tell me way i shud feal i no s 1 got anodyed it me for getin upset over lozin my cat of 16 yrs she wz only 1 it  got me thru a lot of multi los she did aftr  my dad died i seam 2 hav a…"
Jan 12
bluebird replied to Pamela philipp's discussion Understanding grief
"Pamela, That's horrible that you lost your mother and your husband so close to each other. I'm sorry. As for people who criticize or accuse you of "wallowing" -- my advice is to ignore them.  Clearly they experience and deal…"
Jan 11
Pamela philipp and Louise are now friends
Jan 11
Pamela philipp replied to Pamela philipp's discussion Understanding grief
"Louise thankyou it's true empathy does go a long way that's the whole purpose of this website so we could vent and not feel judged about how we feel or how long we grieve and we the grieving (not wallowing) are on this site for however…"
Jan 11
Louise replied to Pamela philipp's discussion Understanding grief
"Pamela, I agree with every word. Thank you for writing this. What someone feels is never wrong, everyone is different and we should all learn to be more accepting of each other and not so judgemental. I was really upset by the "wallowing"…"
Jan 11

Profile Information

About Me:
Married 23years mother of two grandmother of seven
About my Loss:
My mom passed on sept 6th 2015 and then my husband passed sept 14th 2015 eight days after my mom how do you go on from there and also my wedding anniversary is August 15th it will be 24 years and no I will never stop saying I'm married because I am I guess the worst thing is no one in my family seems to care no one calls or has talked to me since the memorial for my husband how can I keep going on and the only reason I'm still here is because I promised my husband I wouldn't follow him into the dark but I really don't know how to live anymore without him and I still am not dealing with my mothers passing either so now what do I do and it makes me doubt there is a god or heaven how could a god that loves you hurt you like that

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Pamela philipp's Blog

Trouble sleeping still

Does anybody else have trouble sleeping I can't seem to fall sleep I'm up night after night really really late usually wind up crying myself to sleep but no matter how tired I am I just don't sleep does anyone else have that problem i've had this problem since my husband got sick and it seems to of gotten worse almost 14 months he's been gone

Posted on November 12, 2016 at 8:06pm — 9 Comments

I feel like I have the plague

My mom and husband passed within eight days of each other in September of 2015. And now for the last year all my family has left me completely alone they don't call why is it when you lose someone like that everyone disappears all the people that said they were going to be there for you is not don't they understand how hurtful that is how do you handle that ???

Posted on October 8, 2016 at 1:00pm — 2 Comments

Comment Wall (3 comments)

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At 9:23am on December 28, 2016, Diana, Grief Counselor said…

Hi,  you may wish to check out the following link.  It's from Dr. Oz.  Let me know what you think of his suggestions.  http://www.oprah.com/health/Dr-Oz-All-Natural-Cures-for-Anxiety

At 10:05pm on November 12, 2016, Lisa said…
Please know that you are not alone. Nights are difficult with thoughts racing and wanting to sleep but you can't. I have to tell myself over and over to let the thoughts go. It's not easy but you made a promise to your husband and he wants you to be ok. Let me know how you are, please.
At 12:47pm on November 12, 2016, Fran said…

Pamela, I share your pain. My husband's diagnosis seems similar to your husband's. Not discovered for way too long and then much too late. Stage IV lung cancer. Just passed 2 years since he died. It's only now that I am starting to feel much of anything. He suffered for 8 or 9 months after the official diagnosis...but we were told it had probably been there for 4 years already. And that's what I don't understand...he'd been thru a couple of surgeries including a nose surgery just a month before diagnosis...why wasn't it discovered earlier? Anyhow, now I have to handle all the "little things" that he would've done. He survived to our 27th anniversary. Decisions were joint or he'd make it based on some input from me. It's taken me this long to just decide to repaint our bedroom! For me, finding myself, finding out what I want without any input from him , well, I'm just lost! I don't know who I am without him. I have 2 adult children who live with me and help keep things going, without them I'd be even worse. I have friends who are more supportive than my siblings. Thank God for them. Anyhow Pamela, we continue because we must.  Know that you are not alone on this forum. We all hurt. We all support each other thru this "new normal".

 
 
 

Latest Activity

KIM Montgomery replied to KIM Montgomery's discussion Missing my Best Friend in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Yes, that is exactly how I feel."
17 minutes ago
KIM Montgomery replied to KIM Montgomery's discussion Missing my Best Friend in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Went to the 2nd session of support group.  Grief is grief and hurts no matter what the loss.  It hurts, you feel alone.  I have learned one thing from group is we are not alone. There are 2 different groups those that are…"
17 minutes ago
Jean replied to Darlene's discussion My grief has made me feel numb from the neck down, has anyone else felt this?
"I had that feeling when my nephew called me and told me his brother had killed himself one year after my brother (their father) died. It was a weird sensation I have never felt before. From the top of my head all the way to my feet just a rush of ?…"
9 hours ago
Nora replied to KIM Montgomery's discussion Missing my Best Friend in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Kim, ladies, I just found some thought that actually explains how I feel now: Sounds familiar? Grieving and trying to be nice, crying and smiling to look nice next minute... It is a great movie anyway - watch when you can."
yesterday
Nora replied to KIM Montgomery's discussion Missing my Best Friend in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Thank you, Jackie. Those horrible panic attacks just visit us often. Suddenly the whole world is turning black and no oxygen anymore. Jackie, I accept you as acting Steve - I hope he does not mind - and I really appreciate your support - I know you…"
yesterday
AnneJ replied to KIM Montgomery's discussion Missing my Best Friend in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi, Kim. Please don't feel sorry about discussing different topics; it's how our minds work and your words are a comfort to so many. Just knowing someone feels the same, hurts the same, has the same inner voice... the empty bed, the…"
yesterday
KIM Montgomery replied to KIM Montgomery's discussion Missing my Best Friend in the group Lost My Spouse...
"I try not come on here in the early morning as I start work early so I can go home early.  That was my routine.  We would get up in the morning, have a cup of coffee and I would go off to work.  I looked forward to going home a little…"
Tuesday
Jackie cooke replied to KIM Montgomery's discussion Missing my Best Friend in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Nora, you are a beautiful women with a beautiful heart. Steve loved you very much but remember you were a success before you met him and not because of him. We need to give ourselves time to grieve it's only been 3 months, who knows if we will…"
Tuesday
Nora posted a status
"Hi, Pumpkin! 3 months without you today. Started looking for a job. I know you are proud of me now. But it is so hard without you. Love""
Tuesday
Nora replied to KIM Montgomery's discussion Missing my Best Friend in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Ladies, I just had one more pain caused by simple actions that I even did not pay attention to before. Well, I sat to start looking for a job. It was already hard as I have a "meeting people & leaving the house" anxiety. Also, it…"
Tuesday
Jennifer B posted a photo
Tuesday
Lost with out him replied to KIM Montgomery's discussion Missing my Best Friend in the group Lost My Spouse...
"I too feel exactly as everyone here has discribed it. Four months in.. Lost the love of my life. I feeling like the walking dead.. I function because I am expected to. I go to work because I haven't any choice. I have to sell my house.( for…"
Tuesday
Bethany posted a blog post

One down...

Having a glass of wine for my mom tonight and trying to wrap my head around the fact that she's been gone for a year. A whole year. A year without daily emails just so I'd wake up to an email every morning. A year without daily Skype chats just to catch up even though nothing much ever changed. A year without an e-card for every random holiday. A year without hearing about the dumb things my dad was or wasn't doing. A year without my best friend. A year without my mom.See More
Monday
gregory harvey posted a blog post

National TV show wants to help unsolved cold cases

I am the producer of a nationally televised crime docu-series. I am currently developing a new series focusing on unsolved cold cases, where the perpetrator is known but remains uncharged, many times because they are already in prison for life for another crime. That should not deter anyone else from getting justice. We will bring in outside, independent cold case detectives to rework cases to see if we can help. The series will underscore the hope, strength and tenacity of the families and…See More
Monday
morgan replied to KIM Montgomery's discussion Missing my Best Friend in the group Lost My Spouse...
"I really hate to reply to this thread as I am four years and almost five months into the loss of the love of my life and I can hardly stand the roller coaster I am on.  I am careening off the tracks "again" and I come here to reassure…"
Monday
KIM Montgomery replied to KIM Montgomery's discussion Missing my Best Friend in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Thank you all for the kind support here.  It does help.  I too feel lost at time.  This morning I was up at 3:30 watching TV; my alarm goes off at 4:45, no sense in trying to go back to sleep.  Like some one else said on here, my…"
Monday
Jackie cooke replied to KIM Montgomery's discussion Missing my Best Friend in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Kim, your not alone, as Nora's says every word you say matches how I feel. I have lost my best friend, soul mate, partner, my lover. Now I'm alone with my dog and cat. OVer 70 people and the funeral but none of them ring or call. People…"
Monday
Nora replied to KIM Montgomery's discussion Missing my Best Friend in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Kim, If I could I would just copy each word of yours and paste it here. I am exactly in the same boat. I know how you fell and what is going on with you. I will have 3 months tomorrow and today is 13 weeks since my Steve just gone, disappeared into…"
Monday
KIM Montgomery added a discussion to the group Lost My Spouse...
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Missing my Best Friend

Again, I am missing my best friend tomorrow will be 7 weeks.  I went back to work last week and it helped some.   Getting into a routine helped.  The issue I have is when I get home he is not there.  That was our time together. Yesterday being father's day the adult kids were lost as was I. My son lives close by and my daughter is 300 miles away.  I was alone without the kids, just my 2 little dogs.  I am so thankful for them.They say go back to work it will help, they say it has been 6 weeks…See More
Monday
Mike H. posted a blog post

Mourning by Definition

MourningThe outward expression of grief over a death or some other calamity. In Bible times, it was customary to mourn for a period of time. In addition to weeping loudly, mourners wore special clothes, put ashes on their head, ripped their garments, and beat their chest. Professional mourners were sometimes invited to funerals.—Ge 23:2;…See More
Monday

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