Pamela philipp
  • Female
  • Hobart, IN
  • United States
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Understanding grief
10 Replies

There has been things on this site I understand and some things I don't however with that being said here is my opinion on recent things I have read about grief I lost my mother and my husband within…Continue

Started this discussion. Last reply by JO B Jan 24.

At the end of my rope
2 Replies

I don't know if I can go on much longer the pain is so excruciating it's getting harder each day it's coming up on 15 months since my husband passed away from cancer and I am having trouble sleeping…Continue

Started this discussion. Last reply by bluebird Dec 6, 2016.

Why does everyone say that things will get easier?
6 Replies

I don't understand why people keep telling me that things are going to get easier when people ask me how I am like a friend of mine that I've been friends with for over 30 years she lost her husband…Continue

Started this discussion. Last reply by annjulie Dec 7, 2016.

Feeling more lost than ever
5 Replies

It's been just a little over a year since my mom and my husband passed I've had no contact with my family because obviously they think I'm fine it's funny how when you lose somebody you find out…Continue

Started this discussion. Last reply by ShingingLight1967 Nov 20, 2016.

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Pamela philipp's Page

Latest Activity

JO B replied to Pamela philipp's discussion Understanding grief
"no 1 gets it till it hapens 2 thm thn thy dnt get it still evn i dnt deep in me all i say s whu why why why i ask am i a nasty persn i do  is t my falt i ask i do i ask a 1000000000000000000000000 qus or mor evry day i do"
Jan 24
Pamela philipp replied to Maxey's discussion Comfort in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Maxey I absolutely understand how you feel my so called family and friends stopped talking to me after my husbands memorial service I guess they think I should be fine by now because it's been 16 months and I guess they think I should just be…"
Jan 16
Pamela philipp commented on Brenda Ann's group Has your faith been tested or lost with the death of your loved one?
"I don't know if I have actually lost faith in God I just don't understand before the loss of my mother and the loss of my husband a week apart I would say I was extremely faithful in God I remember sitting with my husband reading passages…"
Jan 13
Pamela philipp replied to brenda mcintyre's discussion lost in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Brenda first I am truly sorry for your loss my children are grown as well my daughter moved out of state just a few months before my husband passed he passed in September of 2015 Life has not been the same since there isn't a day that goes by…"
Jan 13
bluebird replied to Pamela philipp's discussion Understanding grief
"You are very welcome, Pamela. {{{{{{hugs}}}}}}"
Jan 12
Pamela philipp replied to Pamela philipp's discussion Understanding grief
"Thankyou bluebird I appreciate what you said and you are right"
Jan 12
JO B replied to Pamela philipp's discussion Understanding grief
"thnx my cat of 16 yrs wz mor undstanin thn humens cud be i wud cry on her fur wen my dad died she wud lic me is 2 say sorry humn mom shes gon now iv 2 new kittys i luv dealy i do 2  iv noted cats dogs seam 2 hav mor hume humenn fealins thn…"
Jan 12
AnneJ replied to Pamela philipp's discussion Understanding grief
"Jo, I read and listened to you as you went through the sadness of knowing your good companion, your kitty, was going to pass away. I have a guy like that, too. He's a big, old, male cat who has kept me company for these last years and I pretend…"
Jan 12
JO B replied to Pamela philipp's discussion Understanding grief
"all i no i i wish i cud run 2 go s wear wear no 1 can tell me way i shud feal i no s 1 got anodyed it me for getin upset over lozin my cat of 16 yrs she wz only 1 it  got me thru a lot of multi los she did aftr  my dad died i seam 2 hav a…"
Jan 12
bluebird replied to Pamela philipp's discussion Understanding grief
"Pamela, That's horrible that you lost your mother and your husband so close to each other. I'm sorry. As for people who criticize or accuse you of "wallowing" -- my advice is to ignore them.  Clearly they experience and deal…"
Jan 11
Pamela philipp and Louise are now friends
Jan 11
Pamela philipp replied to Pamela philipp's discussion Understanding grief
"Louise thankyou it's true empathy does go a long way that's the whole purpose of this website so we could vent and not feel judged about how we feel or how long we grieve and we the grieving (not wallowing) are on this site for however…"
Jan 11
Louise replied to Pamela philipp's discussion Understanding grief
"Pamela, I agree with every word. Thank you for writing this. What someone feels is never wrong, everyone is different and we should all learn to be more accepting of each other and not so judgemental. I was really upset by the "wallowing"…"
Jan 11
JO B replied to Pamela philipp's discussion Understanding grief
"so sorry on yore loss had so mush multi loss sisne 2012 thn nov had 2 get my fur kid of 16 yrs put 2 sleep wish kl d nely kild me ot did  my moms ill shes got dem/alz so i no she not goin2 get ber betr shes not  i cum on hear idnt feal so…"
Jan 11
Pamela philipp posted a discussion

Understanding grief

There has been things on this site I understand and some things I don't however with that being said here is my opinion on recent things I have read about grief I lost my mother and my husband within one week of each other it has been almost 16 months now since they've been gone and my grief not wallowing is real some people feel they can move on easily while others find it's impossible not only to move forward but to simply exist. They should not be criticized for grieving the loss of a loved…See More
Jan 11
Pamela philipp left a comment for Diana, Grief Counselor
"Thankyou for the article I will look into those suggestions I will let you know how or if they work"
Dec 28, 2016

Profile Information

About Me:
Married 23years mother of two grandmother of seven
About my Loss:
My mom passed on sept 6th 2015 and then my husband passed sept 14th 2015 eight days after my mom how do you go on from there and also my wedding anniversary is August 15th it will be 24 years and no I will never stop saying I'm married because I am I guess the worst thing is no one in my family seems to care no one calls or has talked to me since the memorial for my husband how can I keep going on and the only reason I'm still here is because I promised my husband I wouldn't follow him into the dark but I really don't know how to live anymore without him and I still am not dealing with my mothers passing either so now what do I do and it makes me doubt there is a god or heaven how could a god that loves you hurt you like that

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Pamela philipp's Blog

Trouble sleeping still

Does anybody else have trouble sleeping I can't seem to fall sleep I'm up night after night really really late usually wind up crying myself to sleep but no matter how tired I am I just don't sleep does anyone else have that problem i've had this problem since my husband got sick and it seems to of gotten worse almost 14 months he's been gone

Posted on November 12, 2016 at 8:06pm — 9 Comments

I feel like I have the plague

My mom and husband passed within eight days of each other in September of 2015. And now for the last year all my family has left me completely alone they don't call why is it when you lose someone like that everyone disappears all the people that said they were going to be there for you is not don't they understand how hurtful that is how do you handle that ???

Posted on October 8, 2016 at 1:00pm — 2 Comments

Comment Wall (3 comments)

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At 9:23am on December 28, 2016, Diana, Grief Counselor said…

Hi,  you may wish to check out the following link.  It's from Dr. Oz.  Let me know what you think of his suggestions.  http://www.oprah.com/health/Dr-Oz-All-Natural-Cures-for-Anxiety

At 10:05pm on November 12, 2016, Lisa said…
Please know that you are not alone. Nights are difficult with thoughts racing and wanting to sleep but you can't. I have to tell myself over and over to let the thoughts go. It's not easy but you made a promise to your husband and he wants you to be ok. Let me know how you are, please.
At 12:47pm on November 12, 2016, Fran said…

Pamela, I share your pain. My husband's diagnosis seems similar to your husband's. Not discovered for way too long and then much too late. Stage IV lung cancer. Just passed 2 years since he died. It's only now that I am starting to feel much of anything. He suffered for 8 or 9 months after the official diagnosis...but we were told it had probably been there for 4 years already. And that's what I don't understand...he'd been thru a couple of surgeries including a nose surgery just a month before diagnosis...why wasn't it discovered earlier? Anyhow, now I have to handle all the "little things" that he would've done. He survived to our 27th anniversary. Decisions were joint or he'd make it based on some input from me. It's taken me this long to just decide to repaint our bedroom! For me, finding myself, finding out what I want without any input from him , well, I'm just lost! I don't know who I am without him. I have 2 adult children who live with me and help keep things going, without them I'd be even worse. I have friends who are more supportive than my siblings. Thank God for them. Anyhow Pamela, we continue because we must.  Know that you are not alone on this forum. We all hurt. We all support each other thru this "new normal".

 
 
 

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Ann Brooks updated their profile
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18 hours ago
Tanya commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
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19 hours ago
Nancy Dynes commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Theresa, YES!! I almost forgot about this but I used to do the same thing. We would be out for dinner and I'd see a daughter with her elderly mother, and I just kept looking at them thinking how lucky she was to still have her mom. Looking…"
22 hours ago
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Thank you Nancy yes I wished that we lived closer also it would be great to talk with you Bluebell, it took me sometime to go shopping, mostly because of panic and anxiety attacks that take over, but I did and still do the same thing I would look at…"
yesterday
Nancy Dynes commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Tanya, I just read your post from yesterday. You are SO right!! I have some clothing of my mom's tucked away that I am keeping. One piece is a shirt she used to wear in the 60's that I remember so clearly from when I was a little girl. I…"
yesterday
Nancy Dynes commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I'm so sorry, Theresa. It's too bad the lot of us don't live nearer together so we could meet and support one another. One thing I've learned through this is that there are people in our lives who can be thoughtless and…"
yesterday
Nancy Dynes commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Bluebell, I can relate so well to this. I can't tell you how many times I have said and felt these exact same things. I'd see a recipe that looked good and start to call my mom to tell her about it, I'd create a piece of art but she…"
yesterday
BLUEBELL commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I went out shopping with a friend today. When I saw a pretty wind chime, I found myself thinking "Mom would like that". But there is no more Mom to get presents for. I miss her. I want her back. I wish this was all a very long, horrible…"
yesterday
catherine bailey commented on Jodi Denton's group Traumatic loss of an only child
"It really helps to communicate with others who have experienced the same loss, so thanks to all who answered my post.  Lenny, Connie and Kim - we all understand each other.  Today was a better day for me - some days are like that.…"
yesterday
Lenny commented on Jodi Denton's group Traumatic loss of an only child
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yesterday
Connie K commented on Jodi Denton's group Traumatic loss of an only child
"Dear Catherine I feel the very same way. I have everything form my son's baby things, through elementary and high school. He died at age 17 and never got to even graduate, drive a car by himself, well you know....I have things of mine I wanted…"
yesterday
cin po commented on Valentina Jolley's blog post Letter to you; my other half in heaven
"I too have regrets and your post deeply resonated with me. I wish I spent more time with him. I wished I laughed more with him. I wish I talked to him more. It's too late now.  I will never be the same. I am trying to help myself in little…"
yesterday
cin po left a comment for Fran
"Hi Fran, I am forced to do all of these things as quick as I can because I have to go back to work soon. I am trying to finish all of the paperwork. I was forced to do things quickly even though I am so emotionally distraught. My world stopped when…"
yesterday
cin po commented on cin po's blog post Talking to people about my loss & grief helps me
"Hi Jewels, I am so sad that your husband died a sudden death. My partner and I had a conversation about what's the worst thing that could happen to him. We talked about it for hours and we cried a lot that night. In a way we were saying…"
yesterday
kim commented on Jodi Denton's group Traumatic loss of an only child
"Catherine, I to lost my only child my son in 2014. im not doing good, I pray to die everyday. theres no life with out my son for me.  shawn is the love of my life.  my depression is getting worse, my loneliness emptiness.  im so very…"
yesterday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Heather, yes I do, I have no one, my husband doesn't even want to hear me talk about it, he ignores me when I do I have not had a dream about her yet To me it seems like everyone thinks I should just move on, but I'm not ready, I have…"
Thursday
Heather commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I do the same thing, at least several times a day. My Mom was a diabetic so I had to take the used testing strips back to the pharmacy the other day. I actually sat In the car hugging it, something of hers that I have to let go of and it made me so…"
Thursday

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