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Michael's Page
Profile Information
- About Me:
- Am a semi-retired writer. Was married to Roxanne 26 years. I like golf and music when not grieving.
- About my Loss:
- My wife died Oct 9, of this year (2016)
About
Groups
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I love my Dad.
382 members
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Traumatic, Sudden Loss
933 members
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I miss my Mom!
690 members
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When will the ache subsi…
77 members
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Lost My Spouse...
318 members
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Elderley Abuse Mum died
1 member
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Widowed with young child…
24 members
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Losing Someone to Cancer
578 members
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You're too young to be a…
121 members
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Losing a spouse and dati…
14 members
Latest Activity
Michaela waldier commented on Julie Dolsey-Weiss's group Traumatic, Sudden Loss"Well, the finality of it all has set in;recieved my hunni's ashes and death cert finally from Alaska.He's been gone 9 weeks. Im no longer angry,im moving towards finding a happy medium, didnt have the luxery of laying around in defeat,have…"
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!"I was so glad that I was able to do everything my mom needed as a caretaker but that did not make her death any easier. I still lost her. I still have the finality of death in my mind that hits me every day like a sledge hammer. And it's the…"
Lisa Green commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!"Brett,
Life is so hard and it's definitely not fair. No one should ever have to lose their Mom at any age.
My mom has been gone for 20 months and I still miss her terribly and I do still talk to her out loud in my car. It makes me…"
Louise joined Desiree's group
When will the ache subside?
A group for people who have lost loved ones with prolonged suffering. For those of us who have seen that the end is coming, and had to watch the ones we love creep toward it.
Louise replied to Ashley Lounsbury's discussion I lost my daddy to suicide."I’m so sorry Ashley, your situation sounds truly horrendous, life seems so unfair. My husband died from suicide on 29/30 September; I have the uncertainty because he disappeared for a night and wasn’t found until the next day, so…"
Louise posted a blog postDoes Counselling Really Help?
I’ve not been on here for a while, it’s been so hard just trying to get through the days; keeping myself busy, trying desperately hard not to think about things and often failing miserably. I’m so tired of feeling so shitty all the time. I had my first session with a counsellor today, after feeling initially nervous and not wanting to say much everything came out and I cried like a baby. I feel absolutely drained now and very emotional. So my question is this, does counselling really help or…See More
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse..."Morgan,
I feel the same as you it has been 4 years 3 months my wonderful husband died. I wish God would just take me. All I am is a zombie walking around in this hell.
Linda
"
Trina Mamoon commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...""All I want, like most of the rest of you, is to reunite with my husband. I want to know he is ok. I want to hold him again. I want his love. The sooner the better." Morgan's words, simple yet so profound,…"
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse..."Bluebird, I find myself wanting to kick over tables or throw something hard at times and yet my old catholic upbringing kicks in and disallows me to act out but I get the same feelings. In the beginning I used to kick a cardboard box a…"
morgan replied to Ashley Lounsbury's discussion I lost my daddy to suicide."I really don't know what to say Ashley. I'm so sorry. There is some kind of weirdness in this universe that seems to have its way with us when we are not at all prepared for how to handle it. Death by any means is hard to…"
Ashley Lounsbury posted a discussionI lost my daddy to suicide.
My daddy was a us navy veteran who brutually killed himself on September 27, 2017 at the age of 51.My Daddy had become really emotionally sick in recent years. He was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia. Which of course he didn't believe because he thought that was the Va trying to control him. He became really hard to be around as he has these crazy conspiracy theories and he heard and saw things that didn't exist that proved to him he was right. Then he started believing people were out to…See More
bluebird commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse..."And along with being incredibly sad all the time, I am also very angry, all the time. Right now I want to jump out of my fucking skin, I want to punch everything, I want to yell and scream. I can't even contain this level of anger;…"
bluebird commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse..."Absolutely, Paul. We do not deserve to live in this hell."
Paul commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse..."bluebird,
As bad as I feel now, I do not look forward to the holidays as this will be the first holiday season without my beloved wife. We also met on a New Year's Eve and I am really dreading that day. I can't see myself lasting years on…"
bluebird commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse..."Same here; I feel just like morgan and everyone else. My husband died five years ago, and my "life" is no better -- in many ways, it is worse, both as a result of his death and due to other factors. For me, the pain of his death, of…"
Paul commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse..."This seems to be an especially hard time for a lot of us lately. I feel exactly the same way as the previous 4 posters."
Marine Marietta posted a groupElderley Abuse Mum died
I lost my mum in September. She was subject to elderly abuse by my older sister. I dont know where to start from. The anger and rage I have for my elder sister, its not funny. I try to get the vision out of my head, and how she treated my mother. The pain is excruciating that i feel, I need to join my mother. I spent a week in the crises centre. I hope this grief and anger passes.Question: how do I accept or come to terms with the matter.I do have evidence supported by my other siblings. The…See More
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You sound very much in the same spot I am in. I lost my husband Oct 15, 2016 and I am just trying to make it to this coming Oct for a short cruise to Catalina and Mexico with my family. After that, I am hoping I will have some relief from the loneliness and overwhelming sadness I am feeling now because I don't think I can live like this for very long. My son, my only child just went through a divorce and I have no support from him and I was a child who was passed off to different relatives because my mother was an alcoholic so I have no close family except for my cousins I lived with from age 13 until I got married. The only happiness I had in life was with my husband of 50 years and now he is gone.
I'm glad you are getting some help. If you have the resources, take advantage of it. Therapy and medication on the basis you describe is a real opportunity to get back on your feet. There's no cure for what we're going through but at least we can try to learn to cope the best we can. Let us know how it goes.
Hey Michael, as much as I try to hide my pain I just can't. It gets to the point at times where it feels like I'm gonna have a breakdown because I can't handle it. It truly helps to talk with other people who truly understand this pain. take care my friend.
A psychiatrist had me on so much Xanax the first 4 months that I wasn't even counting how many. I think that's how managed to take care of what I had to and load up and move. For over a year, I didn't drink at all. I finally got off Xanax a year ago in January and started drinking too much beer. I have lost 30 pounds, gained 40, and lost 30 over the past 18 months. I'm healthy and feel I'm throwing that away by being so inactive. It's not by choice. This has been a rollercoaster ride through hell and I'm trapped most of the time.
Hi Michael.....I lost my husband of 27 years in oct too. it was sudden unexpected and so very tragic. I am struggling to live day to day. I cry all the time and fall apart so much its hard to count. I thought me and my husband could get through anything but I was wrong. now I live in agony everyday. just not wanting to do or go anywhere. I do have 2 fantastic kids both young adults and they struggle too. I feel like I let them down because I can hardly function let alone support them in their grief. looks like all of us are just struggling to survive and hoping not to..
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