"You sound very much in the same spot I am in. I lost my husband Oct 15, 2016 and I am just trying to make it to this coming Oct for a short cruise to Catalina and Mexico with my family. After that, I am hoping I will have some relief…"
"Its been four months for me too. I was an aspiring musician. I took it up late in life. I ve barely been able to pick up my guitar. People encourage me to do so, and the few times i have, i've forgotten so much and i dpn't have the…"
Glad to hear of your experience. Im so alone i think daily of ending it all (no plan.) i think people who care for me near me might prevent that. I also fear that this incrdible stress will activate a small cancer and kill me. Id be ok with…"
"I've been trying to go through the grief not "around" it as recommended. It sucks. Tonight i had 2 wines at dinner; im feeling almost human. A couple xanax and some pot and i'll be all set for the night."
"So im trying to clear out my place in anticipation of moving. There is 20 years of stuff, hundreds and hundreds of books, paper etc. i need to get rid of at least75 percent of it. Ive worked all day for several days, plus had done a little over a…"
"Thank you Kathleen. This is just so very awful. Its hell. The definition of hell. Ive been cleaning out my place in anticipation of moving and after throwing out 12 bags of papers, three boxes of books (to book drop) ive maybe made a 20 percent dent…"
I am also on an antidepressant but am still depressed. And i dont sleep. I am retired so i have little to do but think about my precious wife Roxanne. I am thinking about living with her son and his family - like a child, though id have my…"
In the final analysis, do you think moving to be near family was better than staying alone? I have been facing the same choice. I hate being totally alone 90 percent of the time. As I am retired, i sit in my home alone most days thinking up…"
"In anticipation of possibly moving I have been trying to clear my place of clutter. Today i attacked my office. Sfter several hours ive barely made a dent, throwing out stacks of papers, magazines, various crap that had piled up iver 20 years. The…"
"Im not sure but i havent set foot in our place since my wife died three months ago - she died in the house in my arms - and im selling the place and buying another place nearby with her son and his family. Im sure the grief is not going to lessen…"
You sound very much in the same spot I am in. I lost my husband Oct 15, 2016 and I am just trying to make it to this coming Oct for a short cruise to Catalina and Mexico with my family. After that, I am hoping I will have some relief from the loneliness and overwhelming sadness I am feeling now because I don't think I can live like this for very long. My son, my only child just went through a divorce and I have no support from him and I was a child who was passed off to different relatives because my mother was an alcoholic so I have no close family except for my cousins I lived with from age 13 until I got married. The only happiness I had in life was with my husband of 50 years and now he is gone.
I'm glad you are getting some help. If you have the resources, take advantage of it. Therapy and medication on the basis you describe is a real opportunity to get back on your feet. There's no cure for what we're going through but at least we can try to learn to cope the best we can. Let us know how it goes.
Hi, Michael. I think it's fantastic if you go for a two-week "tune up", as my husband would call it. :-) Little would he know that this is really what happens when the one and only in the whole world we love the most is stolen in front of our eyes. I would have given anything to go for a two-week help setting in the first months of this devastation but I didn't even know it was available. Well, I probably knew it was available somewhere but I had zero human beings in my life who actually gave a sh** about my close-to-breakdown, and fewer than zero who could guide me. Go. If you want, of course. But I think you are a lucky guy to have the chance, and I wish for you the very, very best. I look forward to listening to you on this site and how you are doing. It's so good to see John T. here, too. All of us here, we are but sojourners. Bless us for what we're suffering through. Love from AnneJ.
Hi Michael, Carl here I'm coming to Roanoke Wed, if you want to talk I'd like that and it might be good for both of us we are both grieving for our wives I know it's helpful to talk to someone in the same situation .please let me know it may help
Hey Michael, as much as I try to hide my pain I just can't. It gets to the point at times where it feels like I'm gonna have a breakdown because I can't handle it. It truly helps to talk with other people who truly understand this pain. take care my friend.
A psychiatrist had me on so much Xanax the first 4 months that I wasn't even counting how many. I think that's how managed to take care of what I had to and load up and move. For over a year, I didn't drink at all. I finally got off Xanax a year ago in January and started drinking too much beer. I have lost 30 pounds, gained 40, and lost 30 over the past 18 months. I'm healthy and feel I'm throwing that away by being so inactive. It's not by choice. This has been a rollercoaster ride through hell and I'm trapped most of the time.
Hi Michael we talked here several weeks ago my wife passed I'm November I'm visiting here in Roanoke this weekend with my kids,wondering if you wanted to get together .Leg me know it might be a good thing. CARL ACCOMANDO
Our group is run through Kaiser and we meet every week. It helps. I am actually thinking about individual counseling as well. Today was a really rough day. I do know I have to come to work. Working from home I just want to…"
I have been thinking about you and getting a job. How is that going? I think I remember you saying that you had to leave your job because they did not give you enough time off when your husband died? Of course I do not want to over step…"
How often do you have meetings?
I found a group but they only meet eery 3 weeks. I am not sure yet.
Thank you for sharing your daughter's experience. Steve's daughter was really grieving at the beginning but now she only…"
"Went to the 2nd session of support group. Grief is grief and hurts no matter what the loss. It hurts, you feel alone. I have learned one thing from group is we are not alone. There are 2 different groups those that are…"
"I had that feeling when my nephew called me and told me his brother had killed himself one year after my brother (their father) died. It was a weird sensation I have never felt before. From the top of my head all the way to my feet just a rush of ?…"
I just found some thought that actually explains how I feel now:
Sounds familiar? Grieving and trying to be nice, crying and smiling to look nice next minute...
It is a great movie anyway - watch when you can."
"Thank you, Jackie.
Those horrible panic attacks just visit us often. Suddenly the whole world is turning black and no oxygen anymore.
Jackie, I accept you as acting Steve - I hope he does not mind - and I really appreciate your support - I know you…"
"Hi, Kim. Please don't feel sorry about discussing different topics; it's how our minds work and your words are a comfort to so many. Just knowing someone feels the same, hurts the same, has the same inner voice... the empty bed, the…"
"I try not come on here in the early morning as I start work early so I can go home early. That was my routine. We would get up in the morning, have a cup of coffee and I would go off to work. I looked forward to going home a little…"
"Nora, you are a beautiful women with a beautiful heart. Steve loved you very much but remember you were a success before you met him and not because of him. We need to give ourselves time to grieve it's only been 3 months, who knows if we will…"
"Ladies, I just had one more pain caused by simple actions that I even did not pay attention to before.
Well, I sat to start looking for a job. It was already hard as I have a "meeting people & leaving the house" anxiety. Also, it…"
"I too feel exactly as everyone here has discribed it. Four months in.. Lost the love of my life. I feeling like the walking dead.. I function because I am expected to. I go to work because I haven't any choice. I have to sell my house.( for…"
Having a glass of wine for my mom tonight and trying to wrap my head around the fact that she's been gone for a year. A whole year. A year without daily emails just so I'd wake up to an email every morning. A year without daily Skype chats just to catch up even though nothing much ever changed. A year without an e-card for every random holiday. A year without hearing about the dumb things my dad was or wasn't doing. A year without my best friend. A year without my mom.See More
I am the producer of a nationally televised crime docu-series. I am currently developing a new series focusing on unsolved cold cases, where the perpetrator is known but remains uncharged, many times because they are already in prison for life for another crime. That should not deter anyone else from getting justice. We will bring in outside, independent cold case detectives to rework cases to see if we can help. The series will underscore the hope, strength and tenacity of the families and…See More
"I really hate to reply to this thread as I am four years and almost five months into the loss of the love of my life and I can hardly stand the roller coaster I am on. I am careening off the tracks "again" and I come here to reassure…"
"Thank you all for the kind support here. It does help. I too feel lost at time. This morning I was up at 3:30 watching TV; my alarm goes off at 4:45, no sense in trying to go back to sleep. Like some one else said on here, my…"
"Hi Kim, your not alone, as Nora's says every word you say matches how I feel. I have lost my best friend, soul mate, partner, my lover. Now I'm alone with my dog and cat. OVer 70 people and the funeral but none of them ring or call. People…"