Online Grief Support - A Social Community

I recently received news that my best friend passed away from heroin laced with fentanyl at age 31 on jan 10th. I was in shock and felt like i was in a bad dream. I hadn't heard from him in almost 6 months and figured he was out slamming dope because in the past he would tend to avoid me and my mother (who was like a 2nd mom to him) because he didn't want us seeing him strung out and didn't want to ruin our relationship of trust. May 15th, i arrive home from a job interview and check…

I am not resigned to the shutting away of loving hearts in the hard ground.

So it is, and so it will be, for so it has been, time out of mind:

Into the darkness they go, the wise and the lovely. Crowned

With lilies and with laurel they go; but I am not resigned.

Lovers and thinkers, into the earth with you.

Be one with the dull, the indiscriminate dust.

A fragment of what you felt, of what you knew,

A formula, a phrase remains,—but the best is…

I am experiencing post traumatic stress disorder.  Some days I cry a lot, others not much.  I get upset when I don’t cry.  I feel as if I should be crying all day every day because the thing I feared the most my whole life happened.  How have I not had ten heart attacks by now?  Some days I have bad flashbacks of the hospital.  Other days I feel like I can’t process what happened.  Is my mind blocking what happened to protect me from the pain?  Sometimes I feel like I’m losing my mind.  Am I…

Today is 2 months since I lost my only daughter to cancer and to me being reminded in some way  of what used to be is a hard one for me. She was my best friend, we talked quite often and I visited on occasion. When friends talk about their adult daughters it brings to light the realization that I once had that and I don't anymore and the tears come. I guess when I'm not reminded,I want to still think she is here,only a phone call away. Already many things have changed, we used to talk on the…

I feel that a part of me is missing and I don't know what it is. I lost my only daughter to cancer 2 months ago,she was my best friend,she moved to FL with her husband and children but we talked on the phone every Mon. and Thurs. for hours. Before her passing,I was happy and didn't let things bother me,but now it seems like everything  bothers me especially the little things,and I have to force myself to be happy.

They say time will heal the pain but I don't think that will ever happen. I am extremely torn to pieces over the death of my daddy. The pain and random outbursts of sadness is overwhelming. My dad was still young and we still had so much more life planned. I'm so angry of why my daddy had to leave so suddenly and without any warning. It's almost as if its not real. It doesn't feel real and I just want to see him again.

I'm a daddys girl. Everything I did in life I did knowing…

to all of who have suffered the loss of a spouse,

we have had to endure endless days and nights of immeasurable pain.  A pain that is indescribable to all but to those who are experiencing it.  A chasm so deep that there isn't anything that can fill the void left.

I have times. like I had from November through January, where the pain was so gut wrenching, so unbelievably torturous that I couldnt walk, talk eat or sleep for days at a time.  For this fifth year anniversary it was…

On February 18,2018 my daughter passed away from cancer. She had been battling it for 5 yrs.and today its been one month that she took her last breath.It still doesn't seem real, I miss her every day, she lived in FL  with her children,grandchildren,and husband,we talked on the phone every Mon. & Thurs.for hours (she was my best friend). I flew down to FL when they  brought her to Hospice,as there was nothing more they could do for her,but to make her comfortable and I sat with her,as…

    8 days 7 hours and 25 minutes ago I held my daughter as they turned off the machines and she slipped away. It's kind of a blur after that. Organ donations, funeral arraignments, getting her stuff from her apartment, people calling and coming by. So many people saying "if you need anything, just call." But what can they do, really? So much sadness and anger. Through all of it, I keep getting flashes of her face and body as they brought her out of the apartment. I knew when I saw her, blue…