Don't grieve alone; 14,000 members and growing
Recent postings on “I miss my mom” brought back memories of moments with my mom when I would get very anxious and frustrated, when I would raise my voice and so on. My mom was very forgiving of me, and very understanding — she got how worried I was about her, especially but not exclusively during latter years of complex health issues, and she appreciated that I was trying my best to help. She was grateful to me, and expressed gratitude, which was sometimes uncomfortable, but I was also so…Continue
It's been almost 3 and a half years since I lost the love of my life. In that time, I moved my parents in with me, because I owed them so much. Last year, my 91 year old Pops told me"happy birthday" 6 days before my birthday and the day the docs were sending him to the nursing home.....the last thing he said to me. Now, my mom is terrified that she is going to die in the heart surgery that she has scheduled for Friday. Hey, I'm terrified as well. I did karaoke as a side line, because I…Continue
Added by Kathleen Jordan on March 12, 2019 at 1:40am — No Comments
There are many mentions of guilt on this site, and it often seems to be assumed that all bereaved people suffer from guilt. As far as I can tell that isn’t true for me, unless I am in very deep denial. On the other hand, I feel a lot of shame about being bereaved, being alone, being tearful, distraught, unproductive, etc. At the same time it seems ridiculous to be ashamed because someone beloved has died, and I haven’t seen other people reflect this feeling, so thought it was just my…Continue
I haven't posted here in awhile. The crushing grief that overwhelmed me for so long after my mom died has lifted into more of a grief fog. But some issues within my family have arisen over the past few days, and I'm having a really hard time. And my question is: Why the hell is everyone in such a hurry to "move on?" What is so terrible about being sad, about missing someone? Why is it "normal" to go on with your life like nothing happened, to forget about the past and keep moving forward?…Continue
still feal it
i am not
Added by dream moon JO B on March 2, 2019 at 6:06pm — No Comments
Some have inquired about the twitter box option at the top of the "Latest Activity" section. Apparently, it was an automatic update by Ning. Your privacy is still safe. It's an option for those who connect their personal account here and sync it with their personal twitter account.
If they choose to do so, they are able to share their OWN personal update on twitter by selecting that box before they share their personal update (and nobody else's) here. I hope this clears up any…Continue
Added by Ninja on February 13, 2019 at 4:30pm — No Comments
In the midst of what feels like unsurvivable loss, how do we moor ourselves to the fact that even the most beautiful, most singularly gratifying things in life are merely on loan from the universe, granted us for the time being? Two millennia ago, the great Stoic philosopher Epictetus (c. 55–135 AD) argued that the antidote to this gutting grief is found not in hedging ourselves against prospective loss through artificial self-protections but, when loss…Continue
Added by M Adams on February 3, 2019 at 8:06pm — No Comments
"Blessed is he, who has learned to bear what he cannot change, and to give up with dignity, what he cannot save." Friedrich Schiller
Added by M Adams on February 1, 2019 at 12:00am — No Comments
The moon should appear at its reddest at about 9:12 p.m., with the event lasting until about 10:40 p.m.
Kelly encourages people to take a look. "You know, stop and look up and really think about [how] we are on this huge planet, moving around in space and there's very few times that we can actually be reminded and feel the effects of that," she said.
it has been three years and four months since i lost my mom 9-6-2015 and my husband 9-14-2015 and the overwhelming grief is unbearable also my husbands birthday is on the 20th of this month i don't know how much longer i can hold on,also i have so much added stress from people telling me i have to move on don't they understand that i may look okay on the outside but i am shattered inside i have been numb for so long i feel like i'm in a horrific nightmare nothing makes any sense any more i…Continue
Added by Pamela philipp on January 16, 2019 at 11:49am — No Comments
Since the phlox are dying
and the daisies with their bright bodies
have shattered in the wind,
I go out among these last dancers,
cutting to the…
Added by M Adams on December 11, 2018 at 7:30pm — No Comments
[These recommendations from psychiatrist/tv personality Dr Amen came via this morning's e-mail -- despite the 'celebrity doctor' context and the rather directional tone, they seem worth consideration, at least I basically agree with them, and am trying to implement them -- will paste below in case they are of potential interest to others on this site.]
There is a saying that goes: “If you want happiness for an hour, take a nap. If you want happiness for a day, go…Continue
Added by M Adams on November 21, 2018 at 10:08pm — No Comments
I have been very stressed and upset my daughter came back to my house for a while until she and her family gets on their feet which is not the problem the problem is she has made me get all the things that are important to me out of the house and put in the garage pictures mementos etc. because she thinks that I need to move on she said because it has been three years and she does not understand how she is upsetting me I don't want to be in this house like this anymore how do I make her…Continue
In Jane Austen's novel Persuasion, Captain Harville and Anne Elliot, surprised by a bereaved friend's intention to remarry, debate who loves longer, men or women, and how they weather loss of love.
... with a quivering lip [Captain Harville] wound up
the whole by adding, "Poor Fanny! she would not have forgotten him so soon!"
"No," replied Anne, in a low, feeling voice. "That I can easily believe."
"It was not in her nature. She doted…Continue
No happiness. Nothing to look forward to. Constant pain. Memories everywhere and longing to be able to make more or even talk about them. Scared, needing answers, anxious, lost, angry, devastated, guilt ridden. how could life be so cruel? It’s just not possible.
Today I had to respond to several emails and repeatedly write down that my mother is dead. Finding it very hard to keep writing the words, so hard that it took several days of tearful effort to complete the three most pressing responses. Finally got them done. I just miss my mother so much. I hate picking up the phone now because some part of me still expects her voice at the other end of the line. I feel wounded by family and friends who are grieving so differently from me, who are keen…Continue
Added by M Adams on October 10, 2018 at 4:37pm — No Comments
There will never be a day where I don’t think about you, there could be weeks where it doesn’t cripple me that you’ve gone then all of a sudden it’s like a bus has hit me And it’s like that morning all over again. There’s no pain like this. It’s like someone’s pulled the curtains on your life it’s over now you’ve got to make a new one with no reason as to why or how to do it. The people that you thought would come and show you what to do or be there are no where to be seen…Continue
Added by Daniella on October 10, 2018 at 4:51am — No Comments
The pain of losing a loved one in death is unlike any other. What tends to add to the grief is the unknown. What happens when a person dies? I find comfort in a Holy writing that states, “the dead know nothing at all”. (Ecc. 9:5) If the dead know nothing, how can they suffer?
I rest my hope on such a…Continue
Hi beautiful people,
I lost my father last year, a few months before starting my Masters in Innovation & Future Technologies.
I have used his loss as a source of inspiration for my project, and will really appreciate your participation.
Below is a link to my survey (which, is not very long):
All information will remain confidential and will only be used for…
Added by Alex on September 25, 2018 at 7:31am — No Comments
Three days ago, my mom died. She was alone when she died -- or, at least, she had no family member present. I'd been to the hospice the morning before, and she'd told me, "I'm going to die soon." All I could do was cry, and tell her I was going to miss her. She told me to stop. I decided to take my leave from work as soon as I could, told her I was going into work to do that. And I did. But she did not wait for me. She died the next morning, and I did not make it there in…Continue