Denise
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About my Loss:
My husband died 6/19/2016

This is all so new

My husband of 26 years (we were a couple for 36 yrs) died this morning. He had diabetes for 20 yrs, sarchoidosis which attacked his liver and was on dialysis for the last 5 yrs. I am numb. We have two children in their 20's who live with us and I am like everyone else on this thread, my husband LOVED us and we knew it, Although he has rebounded many other times when we were told he would not make it, this time everything was just too much and his heart just stoppped beating. I can not figure out how to go on, but I know that he would want me to do so, for myself, my children and for him. Everyone who met him loved him and his faith carried him through - each time he rebounded he said God wanted him here for a reason and then preceeded to love everyone he met. We had a huge party last month and he saw family and friends and we had a marvelous time. So glad we had that memory among many others.  We just moved  into a new house last year and one of our last conversations he said he wanted us to enjoy the house. It has not been 24 hrs (he died 6/19/2016) and I can't imagine going to bed tonight knowing he will not walk into this house . I am rambling, I joined because I KNOW I will need to talk to others who have lost a spouse. I feel a little better reading some of the threads

Denise's Blog

Neutral

Yesterday, I had to pick up copies of George's death certificates and it totally devastated me. It did not bother me when I received the copies, I pretended that it did not bother me because I put the copies face down in the back of the car and did not look at them until later that night. I have not read the whole certificate but after I skimmed it looking at the cause of death I fell apart but I forced myself to hold it together until I started sobbing while watching TV with our daughter. I…

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Posted on June 25, 2016 at 6:50am — 4 Comments

Today is not a good one

Today I have not been able to move. I have moved through my house, and have been on the deck but not out to interact with others and I think that it is necessary for me to get outside and speak to or see anyone other than my children. Today is so hard. My body aches and feels like lead, I know that these feelings will come and go and they have over the past few days, but today the cloud is lingering longer than usual and I am afraid if I let it take hold I will never be able to get out from…

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Posted on June 22, 2016 at 1:29pm — 2 Comments

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Latest Activity

Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
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Sunday
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Saturday
M Adams commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
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Friday
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