Denise
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About my Loss:
My husband died 6/19/2016

This is all so new

My husband of 26 years (we were a couple for 36 yrs) died this morning. He had diabetes for 20 yrs, sarchoidosis which attacked his liver and was on dialysis for the last 5 yrs. I am numb. We have two children in their 20's who live with us and I am like everyone else on this thread, my husband LOVED us and we knew it, Although he has rebounded many other times when we were told he would not make it, this time everything was just too much and his heart just stoppped beating. I can not figure out how to go on, but I know that he would want me to do so, for myself, my children and for him. Everyone who met him loved him and his faith carried him through - each time he rebounded he said God wanted him here for a reason and then preceeded to love everyone he met. We had a huge party last month and he saw family and friends and we had a marvelous time. So glad we had that memory among many others.  We just moved  into a new house last year and one of our last conversations he said he wanted us to enjoy the house. It has not been 24 hrs (he died 6/19/2016) and I can't imagine going to bed tonight knowing he will not walk into this house . I am rambling, I joined because I KNOW I will need to talk to others who have lost a spouse. I feel a little better reading some of the threads

Denise's Blog

Neutral

Yesterday, I had to pick up copies of George's death certificates and it totally devastated me. It did not bother me when I received the copies, I pretended that it did not bother me because I put the copies face down in the back of the car and did not look at them until later that night. I have not read the whole certificate but after I skimmed it looking at the cause of death I fell apart but I forced myself to hold it together until I started sobbing while watching TV with our daughter. I…

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Posted on June 25, 2016 at 6:50am — 4 Comments

Today is not a good one

Today I have not been able to move. I have moved through my house, and have been on the deck but not out to interact with others and I think that it is necessary for me to get outside and speak to or see anyone other than my children. Today is so hard. My body aches and feels like lead, I know that these feelings will come and go and they have over the past few days, but today the cloud is lingering longer than usual and I am afraid if I let it take hold I will never be able to get out from…

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Posted on June 22, 2016 at 1:29pm — 2 Comments

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Sue M commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
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I love my Dad.

For everyone that has lost their Dad.
Monday
Shirelle commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"My son came home for 3 month then died"
Monday
Shirelle commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"My son pass away Nov 25 at 936am my life has not been the same I really feel lost , empty nothing to live for but I have 3 other kids I love them more than anything I just don't know what to do please can someone help me"
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Missing my Son or Daughter

For all of us that are suffering the loss a son or daughter.See More
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Billy Jo Colt left a comment for Miriam Holmes
"Hi Miriam, You have my deepest admiration and empathy. I don't have any family left to speak of. For years there was no one to talk to about my daily life. Although I found it difficult to be open with people and preferred to help them rather…"
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M Adams commented on Miriam Holmes's blog post Healing Repetition
"Miriam, thanks for what you’ve said here, think it will be helpful to many other people here and I hope writing it down will help you as well.  What you say about the way you miss your uncle, the loss of rituals and of his expressions of…"
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"It will be 2 months since my son pass I'm feel do lost I'm don't want to work but have bills I don't want to talk to anyone just want to cry"
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Miriam Holmes posted a blog post

Healing Repetition

An uncle in our family committed suicide.  For five years his wife, Aunt Alice, said the same things over and over again to anyone who would listen.  We are a loving family, so we listened and said the same hopefully comforting things back to her again and again.  And after five years she was done and could move on.  I hope it doesn't take five years, but I need to talk about my Uncle Jim and my cousin Paul and probably repeat myself a lot. It took a long time to develop my relationship with…See More
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Katherine A Pericas Geersten commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi everyone, My name is Katherine.  I am learning how to deal with the loss of my mom, she passed away two months ago.My mom was never my best friend, but she was so much more. She made me the person that I am today and living without her has…"
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I miss my Mom!

If you have that hole in your heart that you get when you lose the woman that you shared a body with....
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Katherine A Pericas Geersten posted a discussion

Hello, a little bit about me.

Two months ago, my mom committed suicide. As of now, this has to be one of the hardest things I have ever dealt with in my life. I hope that through this forum I may be able to just reach out to someone who can kind of understand what my situation is like.My friends try to talk to me (and I do reach out to them) but I feel that the situation I am in is a really heavy thing to talk about (basically I don't want to rope my friends into my troubles, nor do I want to be a burden to them). I talk to…See More
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Miriam Holmes left a comment for Dona Fiedler
"Dona, I am so sorry for your pain.  A difficult relationship like yours always leaves all sorts of conflicting feelings that are hard to sort out.  I hope that the support you receive here will help you find your way to a better place."
Jan 22

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