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Multiple Losses Group

I am creating this site for the many of us who have suffered several losses. I lost my mom, dad, grandma(2nd mom), grandpa, my beloved dog and divorce. Many of us have lost more than one person or event. Come share!

Members: 292
Latest Activity: Apr 24

Discussion Forum

When it rains, it pours!

I've lost 6 family members within a 20-month time period; our teen was recently diagnosed with a life-long mental illness, my spouse is underemployed and stressed, and I am unable to work due to our…Continue

Started by Holding on to Christ Jan 24, 2018.

Car accident and the a suicide 4 Replies

Hello. My name is sara. So on the 18th of feb at exactly 3pm my grandad passed away then at 3.02pm my nan died. They were involved in a massive car accident. And they were gone. That day change my…Continue

Started by Sara. Last reply by Sara Sep 12, 2017.

Murder, Suicide, And living in fear 3 Replies

I don't even know if I can do this. My mind is weary and my thoughts are scattered. And death is all around me. In fact it consumes me as I still search for answers and try to understand them all. My…Continue

Started by Janet Shores Hoogendyk. Last reply by Belle Merc Jun 23, 2017.

Why do we think we have more time with someone? 1 Reply

I always felt I should have said more about how I felt about them, did more for them or did more with them. My youngest sister and I lived together, she had OCD and I have ADD so most of the time we…Continue

Started by Babz Worel. Last reply by dream moon JO B Nov 7, 2016.

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Comment by BLUEBELL on April 29, 2018 at 11:08pm

Hi. I used to belong to just the "I Miss My Mom" because I lost my Mom in Feb 14th 2017. April 9th...20 days ago, my sister's husband died suddenly. It is effecting me not only because I love my sister and really admired her husband, but also because this is another loss so soon after the first. For my sister, it is a double whammy because both of us were close to Mom and still mourn her loss. This is bringing back up a lot of sadness and tears are falling as I write this.

Bluebell

Comment by Kris Baclawski on January 23, 2018 at 12:19pm

My apologies to you, Hannah, for my misinterpretation.   I now understand what your counselor was saying.  Yes, finding people who understand is extremely helpful for sharing.  Oddly enough, I find great comfort in my working on genealogy.  Learning how they lived and the struggles they survived are testimonials to the human spirit.  My best to you all.

Comment by dream moon JO B on January 23, 2018 at 12:13pm

sorry for evrys 1 s loss had so mush loss loss in lst 6 yrs 

i no evry loss is diffo thy is

loss my dad in 1212

loss my dad in 2012

so mush loss in 12

evry

yr seams 2 be loss it wz 

loss a cat in 2016 had her for 16/17 yrs i did 

got robdd in 2017 i wz 

lozzin mom befre shes gon 2 alz/dem

soorry  if im ramlin 2 mush

Comment by dream moon JO B on January 23, 2018 at 12:09pm

sorry for evrys loss

had so mush loss in lst 6 yrs 

Comment by Hannah S on January 23, 2018 at 12:07pm

My apologies for not clarifying or sounding insensitive, my counsellor meant it in the way of we are dealing with a lot - as in it's rare for people to have multiple losses. It is so hard to heal when we keep getting bombarded by loss. Reaching out on here with people who have experienced loss on such large levels is very helpful.

I am deeply sorry for your losses Kris. I do too feel those around me too sometimes. It's difficult navigating life without them. I know the pain will never go away but we do learn to cope.My thoughts are with you. 

I do whole heartedly believe you when you say they have made you a better person. I believe that the people I have lost really shaped me into the woman I am today and I am so thankful I got the opportunities to be such big parts in their lives. 

Comment by Kris Baclawski on January 23, 2018 at 11:22am

Hi Jo and Hannah,

I don't believe that only war or natural disaster survivors are the only ones dealing with multiple losses.  I've had in the space of a six years I've lost five close friends, my mother, her sister, a neighbor and nephew-in-law, both to suicide, and two fur kids who were a part of my life for 18 years.

No, it doesn't seem fair.  And I have spent a good bit of time in trying to accept that dying is a part of life.  Sometimes the circumstances of a death have made it easier to accept because our loved ones are free from pain--Mom's stroke that left her brain dead; my aunt's complications from cancer, or organ failure.   In the case of my nephew, I still have a lot of anger toward him but also realize that he too was in great pain--emotionally.  

What I miss most are the holes they left in the fabric of my life.  Yet I often hear in my head the wisdom and love of my Mother, dear friends, and even my fur kids.  So I guess they haven't entirely left me.  I am a better person because of them.   I have come to be more compassionate towards my self and others.  

I hope this may help.  Sending you prayers.

 

    

Comment by Jo l on January 22, 2018 at 7:52pm

Hi all I've lost most of my family in the past 10 years or so and my bf 4 months ago its been very hard to deal with I ask why this has happened and don't have any answers it just doesn't seem fair 

Comment by Hannah S on January 22, 2018 at 5:17pm

I'm recently a victim to multiple loss myself. It's not fair, nor easy to deal with. Any tips? 

My counsellor said generally only people who go to war or deal with a natural disaster are the ones who are faced with multiple loss. 

Comment by Lost soul on January 6, 2018 at 1:42am

I lost my mother when I was four year old, my grandmother when I was 9, grandfather when I was 20, father when I was 31 , got abandoned and divorced by my husband ,lost job too,...its all dark dark n dark.....please help :(

Comment by Moira Lynch on August 10, 2017 at 6:45am

Hi group. Reaching out in desperation. Lost my job in June, my brother in July and my best friend just moved out of state a week ago. Call this the summer of sorrows. Also in the past 5 years have lost my mother, my Godmother and Godfather. Was divorced a year ago in June. It is complicated by earlier losses that went ungrieved. Feeling overwhelmed and close to despair but trying to find some light in everyday. Question: how do you keep moving through grief? 

 

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Latest Activity

Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Something I have noticed is that the content of a dream may not be a big deal, but what you are feeling in the dream is where the power comes from. The dream I had was horrible. It was so short, but I had a sick feeling in my stomach throughout.…"
11 hours ago
Sue Toler commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I dream about my Mom & Dad & thankfully they are always good dreams that are comforting.  An Aunt that I was close to is in a lot of the dreams with my parents.  I have one sibling. He is never in the dreams of my parents.  I…"
16 hours ago
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I rarely dream about my mom. When I do dream about her it is almost always bad. I had a horrible dream last night. It was very short. I was standing near the front door of my mom's house. I looked down to greet my dog. There was a little puppy…"
yesterday
Lauren A Fernandez is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
yesterday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Thanks Nancy, I am sure everyone in our group can relate."
yesterday
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Yes we have no choice but to live without our mothers. Grief and guilt will be there through out and some days will be really hard than others. Yesterday was pathetic for me as my father said something that really hit me. I hope to see my mother…"
Sunday
Nancy commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Love this Linda.  Thanks for posting it. "
Sunday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
Sunday
Nancy commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I relate to you all who have posted lately.  2 years for me.  2nd year was worse than the first as reality set in and shock lessened.  I am still in a trauma state of mind.  Forgetful, irritable, less patient.  I isolate…"
Saturday
Deanna N Nash added a discussion to the group surviving family members' murders
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Nothing feels real

My husband was brutly murdered 6 day ago and nothing feels real to me I'm still waiting to wake up or him to call me the pain is unbearable I don't know if I can go on anymore
Saturday
Deanna N Nash commented on Susie H's group surviving family members' murders
"6 days ago my husband and soulmate was brutly murdered and everyday gets a little harder I haven't seen him yet he's held up at the corners and I'm terrified to see him but I need to see him to convince my mind that this is real and…"
Saturday
Deanna N Nash joined Susie H's group
Saturday
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Robin, thank you.  Bluebird was the honesty that i discovered on this site that made it possible for me to express what I go through.  Several others who write let me know too.  I tend to reach out here, particularly when I am…"
Saturday
Robin commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Morgan - I lost my husband John, 9 years ago, when he was 46.  I come to this website every now & then, but have only commented a few times.  I relate most to you and Bluebird.  I can't believe it's been 9 years, and…"
Saturday
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I really don't know what to say to all the newer people who come here looking for help and comfort because I have struggled for years. I did find an article written by a psychotherapist just the other day that made some sense to me about the…"
Saturday
Sharon batten posted a discussion

Missing my true love

My partner died 14 weeks ago and I am struggling big time without her, we been together for 10 years and now I have nothing left,
Friday
Sharon batten left a comment for Sharon batten
"I hate my life without her now I miss her so much, we been together for 10 years and now I have nothing left"
Friday
Profile IconSharon batten, Eileen A. Palazza, Deanna N Nash and 2 more joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Friday
Kathleen Jordan posted photos
Friday
Kathleen Jordan commented on Anna-Marie's blog post When does the crying stop.
"Even though dream moon can't do grammar, I agree. It doesn't stop...it will hit at moments out of the clear blue....4 years, 9 years or 20.  It is a loss, and it's real."
Friday

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