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Multiple Losses Group

I am creating this site for the many of us who have suffered several losses. I lost my mom, dad, grandma(2nd mom), grandpa, my beloved dog and divorce. Many of us have lost more than one person or event. Come share!

Members: 290
Latest Activity: Aug 2

Discussion Forum

When it rains, it pours!

I've lost 6 family members within a 20-month time period; our teen was recently diagnosed with a life-long mental illness, my spouse is underemployed and stressed, and I am unable to work due to our…Continue

Started by Holding on to Christ Jan 24.

Car accident and the a suicide 4 Replies

Hello. My name is sara. So on the 18th of feb at exactly 3pm my grandad passed away then at 3.02pm my nan died. They were involved in a massive car accident. And they were gone. That day change my…Continue

Started by Sara. Last reply by Sara Sep 12, 2017.

Murder, Suicide, And living in fear 3 Replies

I don't even know if I can do this. My mind is weary and my thoughts are scattered. And death is all around me. In fact it consumes me as I still search for answers and try to understand them all. My…Continue

Started by Janet Shores Hoogendyk. Last reply by Belle Merc Jun 23, 2017.

Why do we think we have more time with someone? 1 Reply

I always felt I should have said more about how I felt about them, did more for them or did more with them. My youngest sister and I lived together, she had OCD and I have ADD so most of the time we…Continue

Started by Babz Worel. Last reply by dream moon JO B Nov 7, 2016.

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Comment by BLUEBELL on April 29, 2018 at 11:08pm

Hi. I used to belong to just the "I Miss My Mom" because I lost my Mom in Feb 14th 2017. April 9th...20 days ago, my sister's husband died suddenly. It is effecting me not only because I love my sister and really admired her husband, but also because this is another loss so soon after the first. For my sister, it is a double whammy because both of us were close to Mom and still mourn her loss. This is bringing back up a lot of sadness and tears are falling as I write this.

Bluebell

Comment by Kris Baclawski on January 23, 2018 at 12:19pm

My apologies to you, Hannah, for my misinterpretation.   I now understand what your counselor was saying.  Yes, finding people who understand is extremely helpful for sharing.  Oddly enough, I find great comfort in my working on genealogy.  Learning how they lived and the struggles they survived are testimonials to the human spirit.  My best to you all.

Comment by dream moon JO B on January 23, 2018 at 12:13pm

sorry for evrys 1 s loss had so mush loss loss in lst 6 yrs 

i no evry loss is diffo thy is

loss my dad in 1212

loss my dad in 2012

so mush loss in 12

evry

yr seams 2 be loss it wz 

loss a cat in 2016 had her for 16/17 yrs i did 

got robdd in 2017 i wz 

lozzin mom befre shes gon 2 alz/dem

soorry  if im ramlin 2 mush

Comment by dream moon JO B on January 23, 2018 at 12:09pm

sorry for evrys loss

had so mush loss in lst 6 yrs 

Comment by Hannah S on January 23, 2018 at 12:07pm

My apologies for not clarifying or sounding insensitive, my counsellor meant it in the way of we are dealing with a lot - as in it's rare for people to have multiple losses. It is so hard to heal when we keep getting bombarded by loss. Reaching out on here with people who have experienced loss on such large levels is very helpful.

I am deeply sorry for your losses Kris. I do too feel those around me too sometimes. It's difficult navigating life without them. I know the pain will never go away but we do learn to cope.My thoughts are with you. 

I do whole heartedly believe you when you say they have made you a better person. I believe that the people I have lost really shaped me into the woman I am today and I am so thankful I got the opportunities to be such big parts in their lives. 

Comment by Kris Baclawski on January 23, 2018 at 11:22am

Hi Jo and Hannah,

I don't believe that only war or natural disaster survivors are the only ones dealing with multiple losses.  I've had in the space of a six years I've lost five close friends, my mother, her sister, a neighbor and nephew-in-law, both to suicide, and two fur kids who were a part of my life for 18 years.

No, it doesn't seem fair.  And I have spent a good bit of time in trying to accept that dying is a part of life.  Sometimes the circumstances of a death have made it easier to accept because our loved ones are free from pain--Mom's stroke that left her brain dead; my aunt's complications from cancer, or organ failure.   In the case of my nephew, I still have a lot of anger toward him but also realize that he too was in great pain--emotionally.  

What I miss most are the holes they left in the fabric of my life.  Yet I often hear in my head the wisdom and love of my Mother, dear friends, and even my fur kids.  So I guess they haven't entirely left me.  I am a better person because of them.   I have come to be more compassionate towards my self and others.  

I hope this may help.  Sending you prayers.

 

    

Comment by Jo l on January 22, 2018 at 7:52pm

Hi all I've lost most of my family in the past 10 years or so and my bf 4 months ago its been very hard to deal with I ask why this has happened and don't have any answers it just doesn't seem fair 

Comment by Hannah S on January 22, 2018 at 5:17pm

I'm recently a victim to multiple loss myself. It's not fair, nor easy to deal with. Any tips? 

My counsellor said generally only people who go to war or deal with a natural disaster are the ones who are faced with multiple loss. 

Comment by Lost soul on January 6, 2018 at 1:42am

I lost my mother when I was four year old, my grandmother when I was 9, grandfather when I was 20, father when I was 31 , got abandoned and divorced by my husband ,lost job too,...its all dark dark n dark.....please help :(

Comment by Moira Lynch on August 10, 2017 at 6:45am

Hi group. Reaching out in desperation. Lost my job in June, my brother in July and my best friend just moved out of state a week ago. Call this the summer of sorrows. Also in the past 5 years have lost my mother, my Godmother and Godfather. Was divorced a year ago in June. It is complicated by earlier losses that went ungrieved. Feeling overwhelmed and close to despair but trying to find some light in everyday. Question: how do you keep moving through grief? 

 

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Latest Activity

Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Avi, I am so happy for you. And you are obviously doing better with women than I am..."
19 hours ago
Chanel commented on Cathy Richardson's group Being the Other Woman/Other Man
"I'm sorry to hear that you're still going through a tough time, Rain. I feel like some days I'm okay and others I'm struggling. I'm here if you ever need someone to talk to."
21 hours ago
BLUEBELL commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Congratulations Avi! Bluebell"
yesterday
Susan Dee Leatham posted a blog post

While I was sleeping

It has been 4 years since my mom died.  I still think about it every day, and can't seem to look past it.  I know I need to go grocery shopping.  I know I need to entertain my 4 year old but before I do anything today I want to share what has helped me tremendously in making my mom's death easier to live with.The first thing that helps is remembering her and being stubborn about NOT letting her go.  I don't have to let my mom go.  She already went.  The thing I do have to do is admit how I feel…See More
yesterday
Susan Dee Leatham posted a status
"It has been 4 years since I lost my mom. I never got "over" it. It has remained the most traumatic terrible thing that has ever happened."
yesterday
Profile IconCJ, Roslyn E!lison, Brend and 1 more joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
yesterday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Your mom is all around you..."
yesterday
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Thanks a lot Theressa.  For 4 days it was a roller coaster ride as we were in hospital but now as I am at my home I again get sad feeling my mother's absence. My wife and daughter is at my wife's place as there is no lady at my place…"
yesterday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Congratulations Avi!!!!! You have many happy years ahead of you!!!"
yesterday
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi All Guys I was away for few days as I am blessed with a baby girl on 10 Aug 18. Both mother and baby doing fine.  I planned my baby only as my mother wanted to see her grand child but destiny had other plans. But I hope she has still blessed…"
yesterday
Rain commented on Cathy Richardson's group Being the Other Woman/Other Man
"It's been almost two years for me. It doesn't hurt any less. Some days I push it away but then all of a sudden every bit of it hits like a ton of bricks. I did tell a few of my best friends and I mostly regret it. Now I feel it's just…"
yesterday
Frances Koonce replied to dream moon JO B's discussion mad at god
"Awww- I’m sorry about that! It must make you feel really terrible that you can’t just take her home.  The same thing happened with my mom after her heart attack. She couldn’t just live by herself anymore. We had to empty her…"
yesterday
Profile Iconmorgan and Natasha Camacho-Gomes joined Amy Reed's group
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Losing a spouse and dating again

I lost my spouse 16 months ago. Have gotten into a new relationship but he lets me grieve openly. I have a2 year old daughter. Also I am 26See More
yesterday
dream moon JO B replied to dream moon JO B's discussion mad at god
"iv bean to day to sea her iv hadto liee to her wish i feal bad wen can i go homee wen drs says so wear isdr on holday  why am hear coz dr says so i anserd it for abot 40 mins i did evry tim i leabee i feal dranedd i do  th 5 mons latr she…"
yesterday
dream moon JO B and Frances Koonce are now friends
yesterday
Jeff Tice commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Thank you bluebird.  My kids have been a huge comfort for me.  Making me laugh even when I don't want to and giving me someone to occupy my time and energy with.  I am working my way through this slowly and they help…"
yesterday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Jeff, So sorry for your loss."
Monday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Anxiety/panic is awful, I had it so bad after my mom passed I was walking with my legs shaking, it was awful I though I this how I have to live the rest of my life in a state anxiety/panic? Just awful I understand what you are going through."
Monday
Crystal K commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"The indifference is hard. I hate it when people ask me how Zim doing or how lifw is... I just want to scream at them “how do you think it is!” My boss constantly asks me and everytime I just respond with a “fine” or…"
Monday
Profile IconJoanna Kalovich, Tea Pot, Cheryl and 1 more joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
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