Richard Rivera
  • Male
  • Union City, NJ
  • United States
Share on Facebook
Share

Richard Rivera's Friends

  • KIM Montgomery
  • irina s
  • Nora
  • Jackie cooke
  • emma
  • Elynn m
  • Doug
  • Brenda Ann

Richard Rivera's Groups

Richard Rivera's Discussions

LIVING ALONE CAN BE LETHAL
2 Replies

I've been having many fainting spells. I can't cook as I leave the oven on and collapse and forget it's still on. This morning I fainted and cracked my pinky toe ( and slammed my head too). I decided…Continue

Started this discussion. Last reply by Jackie cooke on Saturday.

YES, IT DOES FEEL LIKE THE FIRST DAY
3 Replies

I can't stop thinking of my wife Annette. The hell feels like the first day. I woke thinking I shouldn't make any noise because I might wake her up. Then suddenly I realize she's not her

Started this discussion. Last reply by Nora on Friday.

TO REMARRY OR NOT?
9 Replies

Loneliness is killing me every day and night. all I could think about about is being with my wife Annette and yet I know I will never remarry. I know myself too well and my wound is too deep. Just…Continue

Started this discussion. Last reply by Jean Jun 13.

WE JUST CAN'T WAIT TO BE WITH OUR LOVED ONES
4 Replies

All I am doing right now I'm sitting on the edge of the bed in the dark room waiting to pass out.And I am still terrified every night and day thinking where will I be, why can't I just die right now…Continue

Started this discussion. Last reply by Nora Jun 5.

Gifts Received

Gift

Richard Rivera has not received any gifts yet

Give a Gift

 

Richard Rivera's Page

Latest Activity

Jackie cooke replied to Richard Rivera's discussion LIVING ALONE CAN BE LETHAL
"Hi richard, that's really scary, this is probably a stupid question but can you not get some sort of panick button? Shirls brother has epilepsy and he has a button that contacts emergency if he falls or collapses, he doesn't even have to…"
Saturday
Nora replied to Richard Rivera's discussion YES, IT DOES FEEL LIKE THE FIRST DAY
"Every day is like I don't know what to do. I only know that I should find a job but I forget about it on my way to the desk, do something like a robot, pet my dogs - useless, aimless existence... Absolutely everything that belongs to…"
Friday
Nora replied to Richard Rivera's discussion LIVING ALONE CAN BE LETHAL
"Let me know how you are doing.  It is hard. I know: I don't have anybody at all - just my 2 dogs."
Friday
Richard Rivera posted a discussion

LIVING ALONE CAN BE LETHAL

I've been having many fainting spells. I can't cook as I leave the oven on and collapse and forget it's still on. This morning I fainted and cracked my pinky toe ( and slammed my head too). I decided to re-set the toe myself to avoid going to the hospital.Hurt like hell and I'm still in pain. I made arrangements with my brother that if he calls me and I don't respond within 48 hours that I may be injured , unconscious or worse - dead. That he may need to call an ambulance just as a precaution.I…See More
Friday
Jackie cooke replied to Richard Rivera's discussion YES, IT DOES FEEL LIKE THE FIRST DAY
"I had a dream last night about Shirl, I knew in the dream that I only had a day with her and then she would die. I was holding her and we were both sobbing then I must have woke up. Richard it feels like she died again last night, I'm sobbing…"
Jun 16
JO B replied to Richard Rivera's discussion YES, IT DOES FEEL LIKE THE FIRST DAY
"it will evry day i hell"
Jun 15
Richard Rivera posted a discussion

YES, IT DOES FEEL LIKE THE FIRST DAY

I can't stop thinking of my wife Annette. The hell feels like the first day. I woke thinking I shouldn't make any noise because I might wake her up. Then suddenly I realize she's not her
Jun 15
Jean replied to Richard Rivera's discussion TO REMARRY OR NOT?
"What a lovely way to accept the things that happen to us and the ones we love. Your message is one of hope and happiness. I have been struggling with the loss of my mother and a best friend. Now a loss of a long time friend of 40 years to a…"
Jun 13
Jackie cooke replied to Richard Rivera's discussion TO REMARRY OR NOT?
"I agree Joanne, it wouldn't even be fair on anyone else as they could never even to start to compare to shirl. Iv never wanted or looked or thought about being with anyone else since I was 16 so if I haven't in 36 years I'm not going…"
Jun 12
bluebird replied to Richard Rivera's discussion TO REMARRY OR NOT?
"Exactly, joanne. That's how it is for me, too."
Jun 11
joanne replied to Richard Rivera's discussion TO REMARRY OR NOT?
"Bluebird i completely agree with you.x  I am one of those people that believe we have only one true love in our life time , I had mine and even though he may not be here with me, he his still mine, always will be mine. I have zero interest in…"
Jun 11
bluebird replied to Richard Rivera's discussion TO REMARRY OR NOT?
"Anne, You're right,but I wouldn't care if a great guy, kind and intelligent and good-looking, wanted to have a relationship with me (not that it's likely at this point anyway, but as a hypothetical). I have zero interest. I do not…"
Jun 11
AnneJ replied to Richard Rivera's discussion TO REMARRY OR NOT?
"Getting married isn't something you decide to do, that's for sure. At this stage of the game, half of us are extremely undesirable in terms of romantic attraction, and the other half of us don't exactly have the cream of the crop…"
Jun 11
bluebird replied to Richard Rivera's discussion TO REMARRY OR NOT?
"I will never marry again.  I will never date again, or develop any sort of romantic/sexual relationship with anyone else, ever.  The very idea is anathema to me.  My husband is my soulmate, and I never have and never will…"
Jun 10
Nora replied to Richard Rivera's discussion TO REMARRY OR NOT?
"I think, my dearest friends, that LOVE is the only base for any marriage. And LOVE just exists, it does not depend on our thinking about it, searching for it, even rejecting it. You cannot FIND love actually as it is always with you, inside your…"
Jun 9
Jackie cooke replied to Richard Rivera's discussion TO REMARRY OR NOT?
"Richard I to am struggling with the emptiness and loneliness but there is absolutely no way I could consider being with anyone else. As painful as this life is I do not want to replace Shirl. I wouldn't judge anyone or blame anyone for moving…"
Jun 9

Profile Information

About my Loss:
I lost my beloved Honey Bunny wife Annette on December 2nd, 2016. She died from complications from obesity. I myself am obese and heading down the same path. We had no children and I am alone. I live now in silence and devestated.

Comment Wall (5 comments)

You need to be a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community to add comments!

Join Online Grief Support - A Social Community

At 5:22pm on May 18, 2017, beverly zuriff said…

Hi Richard,  I hope you are doing better today.  I know how terrible it is to lose the lose you love. Sometimes the grief is unbearable.  I wish I knew how to deal with this terrrible sadness.  I guess we just have to go through it, it's like a storm that has to end. Take care of yourself.   Bev   

At 4:03pm on May 16, 2017, beverly zuriff said…

Hi Richard,  I hope you can begin to accept what has happened to you.  I prey that for myself also.  Life without your love is terrible.  What can we do?  I guess, we try to accept what we cannot change, but for me, right now that doesn't seem possible.  I hope you  can find your way, I hope I can too.  I  keep thinking, "better to love and lost, than not to have loved at all".  Sounds good but doesn't work for me.

At 8:35pm on May 15, 2017, beverly zuriff said…

Yesterday, Richard, was a very sad day without my husband celebrating mother's day with me.  As I was lying in bed later in the day, I looke up at the ceiling and I saw a basket of beautiful flowers.  I never had hallucinations in my lifetime, and I don't know what a near death experience is, but I thought I would  share this with you.  Bev

At 8:17pm on December 25, 2016, morgan said…

Its what we all keep praying for Richard.  Just last night I took a sturdy cardboard box that a lamp had come in and I kicked it so hard and so long against the wall I thought I was going to pass out.  Some hours can be unbearable.  Some minutes we try to breathe.  Some days are measured knowing we are one day closer to not having to be here alone and hoping we are going to be embraced by our beloved again.  

Its alot of wishing and hoping......and in the interim praying it doesn't last long.  I haven't found an end to the suffering but I will say it varies in degrees.  And yes,  tearing you to pieces sounds all too familiar.  We just bear it.  Endure it.  And this time of year is definitely very very hard.  People who live in the old universe still celebrating while we are jumping off the bridge.  Soon we will be into January ..... try to find something to keep you busy Richard.  Its one of the ways to save your brain from totally going over.....distraction will help somewhat......take care Richard....

At 3:12pm on December 25, 2016, Richard Rivera said…
Today December 25th and I woke up screaming out my wife's name. I chased around the apartment and am in agony. There's no end to this suffering. What do I have? An apartment and a lousy job with silence and grief that's tearing me to pieces. I keep hoping I don't wake up. It is the only thing that I continue to pray for.

Richard Rivera's Blog

LOOKING TO SPEAK WITH SOMEONE HOW HAS HAD A RECORDED NDE

Hello:

I'm looking to (either in this forum or privately by email) to speak to those of you who have had a NDE. 

I wanted to understand certain aspects of the NDE and hope someone can clarify some questions I have.

I'd be forever grateful...

Thanks

Richard Rivera

Posted on May 15, 2017 at 2:40pm — 4 Comments

 
 
 

Latest Activity

KIM Montgomery replied to KIM Montgomery's discussion Missing my Best Friend in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Went to the 2nd session of support group.  Grief is grief and hurts no matter what the loss.  It hurts, you feel alone.  I have learned one thing from group is we are not alone. There are 2 different groups those that are…"
4 minutes ago
Jean replied to Darlene's discussion My grief has made me feel numb from the neck down, has anyone else felt this?
"I had that feeling when my nephew called me and told me his brother had killed himself one year after my brother (their father) died. It was a weird sensation I have never felt before. From the top of my head all the way to my feet just a rush of ?…"
9 hours ago
Nora replied to KIM Montgomery's discussion Missing my Best Friend in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Kim, ladies, I just found some thought that actually explains how I feel now: Sounds familiar? Grieving and trying to be nice, crying and smiling to look nice next minute... It is a great movie anyway - watch when you can."
yesterday
Nora replied to KIM Montgomery's discussion Missing my Best Friend in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Thank you, Jackie. Those horrible panic attacks just visit us often. Suddenly the whole world is turning black and no oxygen anymore. Jackie, I accept you as acting Steve - I hope he does not mind - and I really appreciate your support - I know you…"
yesterday
AnneJ replied to KIM Montgomery's discussion Missing my Best Friend in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi, Kim. Please don't feel sorry about discussing different topics; it's how our minds work and your words are a comfort to so many. Just knowing someone feels the same, hurts the same, has the same inner voice... the empty bed, the…"
yesterday
KIM Montgomery replied to KIM Montgomery's discussion Missing my Best Friend in the group Lost My Spouse...
"I try not come on here in the early morning as I start work early so I can go home early.  That was my routine.  We would get up in the morning, have a cup of coffee and I would go off to work.  I looked forward to going home a little…"
yesterday
Jackie cooke replied to KIM Montgomery's discussion Missing my Best Friend in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Nora, you are a beautiful women with a beautiful heart. Steve loved you very much but remember you were a success before you met him and not because of him. We need to give ourselves time to grieve it's only been 3 months, who knows if we will…"
Tuesday
Nora posted a status
"Hi, Pumpkin! 3 months without you today. Started looking for a job. I know you are proud of me now. But it is so hard without you. Love""
Tuesday
Nora replied to KIM Montgomery's discussion Missing my Best Friend in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Ladies, I just had one more pain caused by simple actions that I even did not pay attention to before. Well, I sat to start looking for a job. It was already hard as I have a "meeting people & leaving the house" anxiety. Also, it…"
Tuesday
Jennifer B posted a photo
Tuesday
Lost with out him replied to KIM Montgomery's discussion Missing my Best Friend in the group Lost My Spouse...
"I too feel exactly as everyone here has discribed it. Four months in.. Lost the love of my life. I feeling like the walking dead.. I function because I am expected to. I go to work because I haven't any choice. I have to sell my house.( for…"
Tuesday
Bethany posted a blog post

One down...

Having a glass of wine for my mom tonight and trying to wrap my head around the fact that she's been gone for a year. A whole year. A year without daily emails just so I'd wake up to an email every morning. A year without daily Skype chats just to catch up even though nothing much ever changed. A year without an e-card for every random holiday. A year without hearing about the dumb things my dad was or wasn't doing. A year without my best friend. A year without my mom.See More
Monday
gregory harvey posted a blog post

National TV show wants to help unsolved cold cases

I am the producer of a nationally televised crime docu-series. I am currently developing a new series focusing on unsolved cold cases, where the perpetrator is known but remains uncharged, many times because they are already in prison for life for another crime. That should not deter anyone else from getting justice. We will bring in outside, independent cold case detectives to rework cases to see if we can help. The series will underscore the hope, strength and tenacity of the families and…See More
Monday
morgan replied to KIM Montgomery's discussion Missing my Best Friend in the group Lost My Spouse...
"I really hate to reply to this thread as I am four years and almost five months into the loss of the love of my life and I can hardly stand the roller coaster I am on.  I am careening off the tracks "again" and I come here to reassure…"
Monday
KIM Montgomery replied to KIM Montgomery's discussion Missing my Best Friend in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Thank you all for the kind support here.  It does help.  I too feel lost at time.  This morning I was up at 3:30 watching TV; my alarm goes off at 4:45, no sense in trying to go back to sleep.  Like some one else said on here, my…"
Monday
Jackie cooke replied to KIM Montgomery's discussion Missing my Best Friend in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Kim, your not alone, as Nora's says every word you say matches how I feel. I have lost my best friend, soul mate, partner, my lover. Now I'm alone with my dog and cat. OVer 70 people and the funeral but none of them ring or call. People…"
Monday
Nora replied to KIM Montgomery's discussion Missing my Best Friend in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Kim, If I could I would just copy each word of yours and paste it here. I am exactly in the same boat. I know how you fell and what is going on with you. I will have 3 months tomorrow and today is 13 weeks since my Steve just gone, disappeared into…"
Monday
KIM Montgomery added a discussion to the group Lost My Spouse...
Thumbnail

Missing my Best Friend

Again, I am missing my best friend tomorrow will be 7 weeks.  I went back to work last week and it helped some.   Getting into a routine helped.  The issue I have is when I get home he is not there.  That was our time together. Yesterday being father's day the adult kids were lost as was I. My son lives close by and my daughter is 300 miles away.  I was alone without the kids, just my 2 little dogs.  I am so thankful for them.They say go back to work it will help, they say it has been 6 weeks…See More
Monday
Mike H. posted a blog post

Mourning by Definition

MourningThe outward expression of grief over a death or some other calamity. In Bible times, it was customary to mourn for a period of time. In addition to weeping loudly, mourners wore special clothes, put ashes on their head, ripped their garments, and beat their chest. Professional mourners were sometimes invited to funerals.—Ge 23:2;…See More
Monday
Dolly commented on Karen's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"we've nearly stopped 'celebrating' anything except those things that are important to our son Bo.. Christmas, Thanksgiving and his birthday.. its easy really because nobody else remembers us on any other holidays except my oldest son…"
Monday

© 2017   Created by Diana, Grief Counselor.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service