~ Joyous Reunions With Deceased Loved Ones ~
©1995; by Bill Guggenheim & Judy Guggenheim

co-authors of Hello From Heaven! published by Bantam Books

Have you been contacted by a loved one who has died? After-death communication (ADC) is probably as old as mankind, but ours is the first complete research study of this field. These spiritual experiences are extremely common, and in many other parts of the world they are discussed openly and freely.

Between 1988 & 1995, we interviewed 2,000 people who live in all fifty American states and the ten Canadian provinces. Ranging in age from children to the elderly, they represent diverse social, educational, economic, occupational, and religious backgrounds. We conservatively estimate that at least 50 million Americans, or 20% of the population, have had one or more ADC experiences – and the actual numbers may be closer to double these figures!

We collected more than 3,300 firsthand accounts of ADCs from people who have been contacted by a deceased family member or friend. These are spontaneous and direct communications that may occur anytime and anywhere, but no third parties such as psychics, mediums, hypnotists, or devices of any kind are involved.

Based upon our research, the following are the twelve most frequent types of after-death communication people report having with their deceased loved ones:

Sensing A Presence: This is the most common form of contact. But many people discount these experiences, thinking, "Oh, I'm just imagining this." It's a distinct feeling that your loved one is nearby, even though he or she can't be seen or heard. Though most often felt during the days and weeks immediately after the death, you may sense his or her presence months and even years later.

Hearing A Voice: Some people state they hear an external voice, the same as when a living person is speaking to them. However, the majority of communications are by telepathy – you hear the voice of your relative or friend in your mind. When you have two-way communication, it is usually by telepathy. In fact, it's possible to have an entire conversation this way.

Feeling A Touch: You may feel your loved one touch you with his or her hand, or place an arm around your shoulders or back, for comfort and reassurance. You may feel a tap, a pat, a caress, a stroke, a kiss, or even a hug. These are all forms of affection, nurturing, and love.

Smelling A Fragrance: You may smell your relative's or friend's favorite cologne, after-shave lotion, or perfume. Other common aromas are: flowers (especially roses), bath powders, tobacco products, favorite foods, and his or her personal scent.

Visual Experiences: There are a wide variety of visual experiences, which we have divided into two broad categories: partial visual and full visual ADCs. Appearances range from "a transparent mist" to "absolutely solid" with many gradations in between. You may see only the head and shoulders of your relative or friend, or someone you love may make a full appearance to you, and you will see the entire body as well, which will appear completely solid. Some visual ADCs occur in the bedroom, next to or at the foot of the bed. Others may happen anywhere – indoors or outdoors – even in a car or aboard a plane. Typically he or she will be expressing love and well-being with a radiant smile. Loved ones virtually always appear healed and whole regardless of their cause of death. Verbal communication may take place, but not always.

Visions: You may see an image of a deceased loved one in a "picture" that is either two-dimensional and flat or three-dimensional like a hologram. It's like seeing a 35 mm slide or a movie suspended in the air. Visions are usually in radiant colors and may be seen externally with your eyes open or internally in your mind. Communication may occur, especially during meditation.

Twilight Experiences: These occur in the alpha state – as you're falling asleep, waking up, meditating, or praying. You may have any or all of the above types of experiences while you are in this state of consciousness.

ADC Experiences While Asleep: Sleep-state ADCs are much more vivid, intense, colorful, and real than dreams. They are very common. Both one-way and two-way communications are typical. You usually feel your loved one is with you in person – that you're having an actual visit together. These experiences are not jumbled, filled with symbols, or fragmented the way dreams are.

Sleep-state ADCs are similar to those that occur when you are wide awake. Your relative or friend can come to you more easily, however, when you are relaxed, open, and receptive, such as while you are in the alpha state or asleep.

Out-Of-Body ADCs: These may occur while you are asleep or in a meditative state. They are dramatic experiences during which you leave your body and often visit your loved one at the place or level where he or she exists. These are extremely vivid, intense, and real – some say, "more real than physical life." The environments usually contain beautiful flowers and butterflies, colorful bushes and trees, radiant lighting, and other lovely aspects of nature – and are filled with happiness, love, and joy.

Telephone Calls:
These ADCs may occur during sleep or when you are wide awake. You will hear a phone ringing, and if you answer it, your loved one will give you a short message. Two-way conversations are possible. His or her voice will usually be clear but may seem far away. If you are awake, you will probably not hear a disconnect sound or a dial tone when the call is completed.

Physical Phenomena: People who are bereaved often report receiving a wide variety of physical signs from their deceased relative or friend, such as: lights or lamps blinking on and off; lights, radios, televisions, stereos, and mechanical objects being turned on; photographs, pictures, and various other items being turned over or moved; and a long list of "things that go bump in the night."

Symbolic ADCs: People frequently ask a Higher Power, the universe, or their deceased loved one for a sign that he or she still exists. Many receive such a sign, though it may take some time to arrive. Occasionally these signs are so subtle they may be missed, or they may be discounted as mere "coincidences." Common signs include: butterflies, rainbows, many species of birds and animals, flowers, and a variety of inanimate objects such as coins and pictures.

According to our research, the purpose of these visits and signs by those who have died is to offer comfort, reassurance, and hope to their parents, spouse, siblings, children, grandchildren, other family members, and friends. They want you to know they're still alive and that you'll be reunited with them when it's your time to leave this physical life on earth – and they'll be there to greet you when you make your transition. Their most frequent messages, expressed verbally or non-verbally, include:

"I'm okay ... I'm fine ... Everything is okay ... Don't worry about me ...

Don't grieve for me ... Please let me go ... I'm happy ... Everything will be all right ...

Go on with your life ... Please forgive ... Thank you ... I'll always be there for you ...

I'm watching over you ... I'll see you again ... I love you ... Good-bye ..."

You may be asked to give a message from your loved one to somebody else. We urge you to write down the message verbatim and to deliver it, if possible, because it may help the recipient far more than you realize.

Nearly all ADCs are positive, joyful, and uplifting encounters that reduce grief, provide lasting comfort and hope, and accelerate emotional and spiritual healing. We encourage you to trust your own experiences and to accept them as being real for you.

Unfortunately, some people react with fear when they have an ADC. This is usually because they are startled by the suddenness of the event, or they may have never heard of one happening to anybody else. Such people may assume they are "losing their mind and going crazy." And others find it difficult to reconcile after-death communications with their philosophical or religious beliefs.

Not all people are contacted by their deceased loved ones. We don't know for certain why some are and some aren't, but it seems that fear, anger, and prolonged heavy grief inhibit the possibility of having an ADC.

Based upon our research, we suggest the following: Ask for a sign that your relative or friend continues to exist. Pray for him or her and others who are affected by the death, including yourself. We recommend that you learn how to meditate, especially if you are currently bereaved or have unresolved grief. Meditation will enable you to relax and soften any fear or anger you may have. It will reduce your depression, improve your ability to eat and sleep, and facilitate your healing process. These deep relaxation exercises will also allow you to unfold your inner, intuitive senses. In fact, you may have an ADC experience while you are meditating.

Our research indicates that after-death communications are a natural and normal part of life. Therefore, we feel ADCs deserve the same public awareness and acceptance that near-death experiences (NDEs) have already received.

For most people, an after-death communication from a deceased family member or friend is valued as a sacred and profound experience that will be cherished for a lifetime. ADC experiences usually expand one's understanding of life and offer a deeper awareness of life after death. They consistently communicate an essential spiritual message: "Life and love are eternal."

Copyright © 1995 - 2009 The ADC Project. All rights reserved.

Webmaster: Will Guggenheim

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Tags: ADC, after, communication, death

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Comment by Pennywyze on January 23, 2021 at 6:55am

April 11, 2019, 2 days after Jeremy passed, he talked to me. It was a quick, "Hey!", but I knew it was him. Fast forward a few weeks. It was 3 days until his family and friends gathered to say goodbye, and I argued with him from May 1 to May 5 (the day of his benefit) because I told him I was wearing a dress to the VFW Hall to say goodbye, and raise money for his cremation and trip back home (He passed away in North Dakota, and our home is in Texas.) 

Anyway, he was very mad because I didn't wear dresses for the 16 years we were together, and he'd be damned if I wore one on May 5; I told him, "I became a completely different person when I heard you died, and I'm not about jeans, t-shirts and sneakers, anymore. Besides, I wanna see you stop me". 

Until the week after Thanksgiving, last year, Jeremy talked my head off. This was something I found quite absurd because when he was alive, he was a young man of few words, but when he spoke, people stopped to listen. He had gotten even more quiet in the last 4 1/2 years he was around, and even more so right before the accident. 

I very much believe God allows our loved ones the ability to talk to us when they pass in order to comfort us.

I couldn't ever figure out why anyone would want to keep physical possessions of someone who passed, but I never judged because I didn't know their pain. When Jeremy passed, I had a few things, but I lost them within the first year. Although I truly truly wanted to keep something of his, I believe if it was meant for me to have anything I would have something. Not only that, but I've since come to believe that keeping ashes, locks of hair, clothes or items from the wallet of the one who is gone, we're keeping their spirit bound to Earth. Just my opinion. 

Comment by John Locke on December 29, 2020 at 7:26am

In '91 I had a dream that I saw my grandfather and he told me he was okay. I hadn't seen him in about 5 years and didn't know until a day later that he had died the same night of my dream.

Last week on the 23rd I was watching TV in my home and clear as day I heard a female voice call my name. It was so real that I looked away from the TV and in the direction of where I heard the voice. I thought to myself, "My mom just died" because she was in the hospital recovering from surgery but that turned out to not be the case. On Sunday I went to see her. She was asleep and the lights were out when I went in her room so I sat in the dark on the couch and started to look at messages on my phone. One of the messages was from a friend who knew the brother of a woman I almost married 40 years ago. She told me that she had died on the 23rd. I had loved her all my life.

I don't know if these things are truly contacts, coincidences or explainable by other means but it does give one pause to ponder the possibility of something more.

Comment by dream moon JO B on August 24, 2020 at 5:09pm

im still getin fethrs i am i no off dad evn off lovd 1s in spirtt i am

we all wsihh we cud hav lik buttenn we wud do we do 2 brettt we do

iv bean hear sine 2012 

2 day i had beef gravy smelll i did i no it wz dad agan tobacoo smook famly it smokt it wz thm 

i no i hear sness spirtss i do sine goin 2 spookss churchh iv fondd lots abot spirt evn my selff i hav 

i no im not mad or nutss no mor i do

or itss al in my hed  but iv had lotss of fethrss i hav evn fallin on me i hav i no spirt si arond me 

evn all oldd mevrs will tell us if thy hear thy av had siness 2 

Comment by Alma P on August 1, 2020 at 5:02pm

Alexandra Tomko - 

That is beautiful... thank you for sharing it. I loved reading it. Its horrible that you were assaulted by another man... I'm sorry to hear that it happened. I have to say that, I am amazed by your courage and strength to be able to see the positive side of things even after so much strife. You're amazing

Comment by Brett Bowman on August 1, 2020 at 4:14pm

Alexandria, I wish I could click a like button. God Bless You.

Comment by Alexandra Tomko on August 1, 2020 at 11:47am

I had a conversation with my son two years after his passing. I lost him during pregnancy and it haunted me that I would never know him and that brief conversation meant the world to me. He revealed things I hadn't even realized I had been asking. In addition, I had suffered from infertility for a decade before conceiving him and after his passing my marriage was falling apart. I was sure I would never have a living child. "The pregnancy won't be easy," he said at the end of our conversation. "The pregnancy?" I asked. "It will happen. Sooner than you think." It would be a girl, he told me. And he left. As I predicted, my marriage did in fact end in divorce, and I was not seeing anyone new, so I could not figure out what he could have meant. Two years after our conversation I was wandering late at night and I was assaulted. Almost immediately I knew I was pregnant. My daughter is five now and the light of my life. She is truly a miracle, one only my son knew was coming. That conversation was the main thing that allowed me to decide to try to live again, to see any beauty or hope or love. It changed - and saved - my life. 

Comment by dream moon JO B on July 24, 2020 at 5:55pm

grt storyy alma it is latley iv bean gein fethrs on door stepp fali in my bags or in my handd or hanbag i ahbv

Comment by Alma P on July 23, 2020 at 12:57am

When I was younger I lost one of my best friends. We were 17 and he had been shot. I felt a huge heaviness on that day and could not explain where it was coming from.

Some time later, someone told me the story of him getting shot a block away from his house. They said the date and I remember the pager from that date. The sudden jolt flooded me... tears came out of my eye sockets and blood smeared into them. I saw blood on my face in the mirror. I washed it away... 

Several months later, the grief would not leave me. I fell asleep with my window open one night. I dreamt of a building next to a smaller tree. Him and i were sitting together. I was in his lap. He said "everything is going to be ok" and he hugged me before I heard a woman calling his name. Then he had to go and I woke up. 

Some time later, I finally mustered up enough strength and courage to visit his grave. I found it... and not 20 ft from that grave was the building with the tree exactly as i dreamt it. I will never forget it. 

That year, my 18th birthday came and a single white butterfly followed me through the house, down the hall, and into my dark bedroom. My sister in law said that is too creepy. I went in my room and I felt a comfort. Bryan used to tell me that moths and butterflies are spirits of the dead coming to visit us. I remembered him telling me that as we once sat in his garage, he missed his father who had passed away, and it brought him comfort so we let the moth stay in the garage with us as we talked all night. He also told me that he had a reoccurring dream that he would go young one day and he needed to live as much as he could until then.

So... Before I fell asleep, I told that butterfly that I knew he was there for a moment and would need to leave again... so I opened the window, and thanked him before going to sleep that night. 

I didn't realize just how good he was to me in life... I later found out that I had PTSD... there were nights when I had lost track of time and woke up hugging him... without being able to explain why. He never told me or let anyone tell me. He didn't want me to feel bad so he continued to cradle me when I'd have my  blackouts. He cradled me when life was darkest... and when his light needed to move on... he made sure to leave me with just enough light to be able to rekindle my own. 

Comment by dream moon JO B on April 23, 2019 at 6:13pm

iv smeltt beef gravyy on off lastt few dayss dad luvd beef he did evenn beef gravy he did lk his arond 

iv learndd lots off spook churchh i ahv hav

seertenn smellls let u no thy hear

evn told me i need to slow get a/r in my body sortedd to lk i ned new meds wish i get it i don

i no my fingrss can stopp me frm typin coz i cnt feal keyss on lt i cnt

but lst week it spookss i got few famlyy getin trju i did

i wishd id gon in 2012 i do 

it mited of stopedd mom frmg frm getin alz/dem

en my uncle  so on

but thy toldd me i need to stat put my slf 1st coz ea of a old fashin atchh tim to put me 1st coz iv put otgrss 1st fro to long wush wz so spott on iv alwayss put ohrers 1s selff lastt

now to put me 1st 

i n wot i need to do 

its sumthng iv needed to do for yrs sisnes i w z borb

Comment by dream moon JO B on December 17, 2018 at 4:44pm

sum tims smells get strongr thy do

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