Information

Sole Survivors

For those who are the last surviving members of their immediate family.

Location: New York, NY
Members: 11
Latest Activity: Apr 21, 2018

I Know I'm Not Alone

I'm starting this group in the hopes of finding others out there who are in my unique situation - having lost my entire immediate family before 30.  My mother passed when I was 13 after a six year battle with breast cancer, and my father died of lung cancer when I was a sophomore in college.  This past New Year's my sister committed suicide, leaving me as the sole survivor of my family.

Ideally I would like to start some sort of meet-up in New York, but I'm not sure how many people will stumble upon this post.  If you're out there, I'd love to connect.

Discussion Forum

One of Two Directions? 4 Replies

So - if you're on this forum, you've probably lost both of your parents and probably at least one sibling, like myself.  Here's my question:  After the loss of both parents while still in your…Continue

Started by Jessica Granantowski. Last reply by Kate Sep 20, 2015.

Lost mom, brother, dad will soon follow...

I hope it's okay to post here... I feel as if I've lost my whole family, though my dad is still physically alive. He has MS and dementia, and his health and mental well-being have severely declined.…Continue

Started by Kimberly Jun 18, 2014.

nightmares

Since i lost my sister which i am having trouble getting over.I have been having nightmares .I don't remember them but my husband says i talk in my sleep and it sounds like I'm fighting with someone…Continue

Started by bobbie Aug 23, 2013.

Comment Wall

Comment

You need to be a member of Sole Survivors to add comments!

Comment by Jen L on April 21, 2018 at 10:40am

I'm not sure anyone is still active in this group but it' the most appropriate group on here I've found I guess. I tried the Multiple losses group but those guys all have tons of people still left as a support system. Hmm. There's no Everyone's Dead-Zero Family extended and so on groups. There's an opportunity I guess. 

Anyways, last year my Mom, Dad, Aunt Brother and dog...even my damn dog died. I had that dog for 14 years, I really wish he hung o considering how muc everything else sucked.

Everyone spaced it out nicely a few months apart for full impact. Illness, not trauma. Dad was the last right before Christmas. I attended the funeral with just the Priest. I was exhausted from making arrangements all year so I just did it alone. 

Now I get to figure out how to keep their beloved horse farm which is in massive debt as I deal with a foreclosure from leaving my job to...wait for it...be with my sick family before they die. Ahhh, lol...death and taxes, so fun for the only one left behind. 

My friends act like none of this is happening. So if I don't act chipper for every moment of the dy, thy wonder why. When I say "I'm upset bout my family being dead and I'm all alone" I've literally gotten "no but really, why are you upset?"

Not one person visited me after any of these losses. Not one. I got invites to come see them sure but it's hard after losing someone. It's

 really hard after losing 2...3...4...5.

Don' tell me to journal or pray to Harry Potter, Bugs Bunny or whatever fictional characters some person wrote down in an edited book. Those are nice for some, like fingerpainting or basketweaving. I have to deal with real life Wills and estates alone. I have to figure out how to fix up a old farmhouse alone. If people won' be bothered to say hi to someone who lost thir entire family, they probably won' come by to swing a hammer. 

Be happy you probably still have an Emergency contact to list as someone on here very thoughtlessly posted about how awful that would be to not have anyone to write down. 

It is awful. 

Comment by Sara on August 29, 2014 at 5:01pm
I lost my mum and dad by the time I was 24. I'm 49 now and lost my only sibling 9 days ago. It's very strange to be the sole survivor of my birth family.
Comment by Bill Smith on September 14, 2013 at 10:35am

Hi Jessica, I hope Austin is going well for you. I don't know what other sites you may have reached out to but might want to try this one - I've found warm friendly people there, and I think it gets a little more "traffic" so maybe you'll have better luck finding people who can relate: http://forums.grieving.com/index.php/forum/13-loss-of-a-parent-moth...

Best to you.

Comment by Sheila B. on July 8, 2013 at 10:35am

Jessica, I am so sorry for your loses. My daughter and I are both only children and we lost my mom to a sudden heart attack. Wishing your strength and peace. 

Comment by Bill Smith on April 6, 2013 at 7:49am

PS I can't figure out how to leave a group so I guess you're stuck with me.   :)

Comment by Bill Smith on April 6, 2013 at 7:47am

Ruthie, I'm so sorry for your loss as well.  I can't imagine what y'all must be going through.

Hi Jessica - since you've found a kindred spirit here, I'll jump off (again only as I don't "qualify").  I will say that having lost my only love and not being at all close to my family, I can very much relate to feeling very much "alone out there," if that makes any sense, although of course it's not the same thing as what you're dealing with. 

Either of you, feel free to reach out any time.  (PS I have friends in Austin and have heard it's a great place; sounds like a good move for you)

Comment by Ruthie K on April 2, 2013 at 1:38pm
Six months ago, after the death of my father, I became the sole survivor of my original family. I agree, Jessica: it is alienating. I have only a handful of friends my age who have lost a parent, a few who have lost a sibling, but none who has lost all of them. I don't know who to talk to about it. I would love to connect with you, Jessica.
Comment by Jessica Granantowski on April 2, 2013 at 12:16am

Hey Bill - I caught the irony there as well...  it's a pretty alienating experience, which is why I came on this site to begin with.  Definitely appreciate you reaching out - I've just relocated to Austin and figure I might as well start with a suicide support group.  Thank you for the kind words, and I hope you're moving forward through whatever loss you are dealing with too.

Comment by Bill Smith on March 21, 2013 at 1:20pm

Jessica:  I hope you'll forgive me for joining, even if only temporarily, as I do not "qualify" - but I was so touched by your situation and found it sadly ironic how even on this site you are still alone (the only member of the group) that I felt compelled to reach out simply to offer my sympathies and an ear, if you wished, as I can relate to loneliness as I have known plenty, though I appreciate it's not the same as yours of course.  Again, for whatever it's worth.  I'll check back off and on in case you want me to exit the group, or want to talk at all.  Regardless, I am so sorry for your losses and wish you the well in this hardest of paths to try and (again) navigate... 

 

 

Members (11)

 
 
 

Groups

Latest Activity

joe kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I still can't see pics and nothing back from ninja yet."
18 hours ago
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Our last trip together, cruise to the Bahamas. What a great memory."
18 hours ago
dream moon JO B replied to dream moon JO B's discussion mad at god
"sinse goin  to spookss spirtt churchhss it seams to  get me comfott it dz i dt frs fewa; feal alonee i do not not iv sean  peplee in tears ti i do bt so omftin ido not get told how i…"
yesterday
Addie commented on Cathy Richardson's group Being the Other Woman/Other Man
"I had a relationship with someone for 5 years. I am married, and wasn't ready to leave my husband. So this man and I met infrequently (every month or 2) and talked a lot through text, but I felt like we had a very close bond. He finally told me…"
Thursday
Addie joined Cathy Richardson's group
Thumbnail

Being the Other Woman/Other Man

This is for anyone who has lost their lover to death and you were the other woman/other man in their life. We have to grieve in silence. I can't find any support groups and feel like I'm the only one going through this situationSee More
Thursday
Profile IconAddie and Donald Perry joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Thursday
joe kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"How do you guys have your settings?  I didn't have a problem before a couple of days ago."
Wednesday
joe kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I can't see the pics still but glad you guys can.  I sent a message to ninja  to check if I have a setting wrong.  I have pics to be seen by friends set.  I have 750 pics of Her (from about aged two till days before She left…"
Wednesday
Trina Mamoon commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Joe, Your wife, the love of your life, is BEAUTIFUL! And it does seem like it was destiny that brought the two of you together. Beautiful story of the two of you meeting for the first time. Like Linda says, we have to be grateful that God sent us…"
Wednesday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Joe, Your wife is beautiful. We just have to so blessed for God sending us our soulmates."
Wednesday
joe kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"She was sent to save me.  There was a fate of that.  Too many coincidences to be otherwise.  I was born to a terrible family relationship in one State and She was born to a good stable family relationship.  We both moved to a…"
Wednesday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Everyone,  Thanks for the cudos. I know every one of us is trying to cope with the loss of our Beloved Spouses. I too cannot do the things we shared and that's just about everything. Our likes were the same, so the only thing I did…"
Wednesday
Profile IconMary and Leane joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Wednesday
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I am so grateful that each of you share what you are doing and how you are dealing with your loss at whatever stage in months or years.  In the past I never had to worry about looking for company for misery.  I wasn't miserable.…"
Wednesday
Marita commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Trina, Thanks for your encouraging words."
Tuesday
Trina Mamoon commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Morgan, What you say here about your day sounds like my miserable daily schedule: "My schedule is pretty much go to the bedroom between 1 to 4am and most often I sleep until 11 or noon.  And if I have to get up quickly I find I end up…"
Tuesday
Trina Mamoon commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Marita,  I can relate to what you are saying: the activities that Joseph and I loved to do together are now very painful to do on my own. But it seems that you have started taking baby steps in the right direction by starting to run again.…"
Tuesday
Trina Mamoon commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Linda, This is awesome! How inspiring that you run marathons to honor your beloved husband and soulmate Julian at age 65! "
Tuesday
Marita commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Linda, That is quite an accomplishment! My husband was my running partner and we did a lot of charity runs together. My last run was 2 months after he died and dedicated the run to him. Since then I have tried running alone but it was too…"
Tuesday
joe kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"WOW, that's great! "
Tuesday

© 2019   Created by Ninja.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service