Kathleen Jordan
  • Female
  • Lake Placid, FL
  • United States
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About Me:
I am 52, a high school teacher, and it took me 3 marriages/divorces and 16 years to find the love of my life. I ride motorcycles, sew, have a wonderful daughter and cowboy grandson. I have cats and a dog (thanks to my protective daughter) and live in the boonies.
About my Loss:
My significant other was in a horrible motorcycle accident in March of 2015. He was in ICU for 3 weeks, had 2 rods in his back from T5-T12, and left the hospital 4 weeks after his accident. I was his care giver all summer, and then I had to go back to work. He moved forward, even got back on the bike and became tough again(for the ride). He refused to take opioids and hated the follow up doctors he had. It took until he was so swelled that he couldn't get in his tennis shoes and I had been diagnosed with breast cancer before he finally went to the emergency room. By that time, it was too late. His liver was failing (cirrhosis), and one hospital sent him home with meds he couldn't take. I had my lumpectomy on Friday and he went back in the hospital Monday. He left the hospital on Saturday, October 15th, 2016--his 49th birthday--and signed himself into hospice. He stayed home. He was lucid for about three days and passed that Friday. We were fighting for his social security, but since we weren't married, he got a letter after he died that he wasn't eligible because he was deceased.

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Kathleen Jordan's Blog

Anniversary Dates

Last night was tough....very tough.  2 years ago, I thought he was going to die then. It was an emotional month while he was in ICU and step down.  But, it was the same date (5 months ago) that he went to his peace and I went here.  Today was not good either...especially when my mom realized what yesterday was and facebook showed a memory of him last year...almost healthy.  Some one said that the dates are hard, but it gets more routine.

There are times that I  wonder if I was too…

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Posted on March 22, 2017 at 6:15pm

I don't know what to title this

Tomorrow is that day....that horrible day when everything started to go to crap.  When he quit cooking for our riders, he went on a memorial run for a friend of ours that got in an accident the year before....the day that he got into his accident....and died in the ambulance.....I saw the chopper set down, and an acquaintance of mine ran out as the paramedic...and I yelled at him..."That's my hunny in there!  PLEASE take care of him!"....That was 2 years ago.    Yes, I got him for an extra…

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Posted on March 20, 2017 at 10:30pm

Memories

Maybe I'm strange. I enjoy my memories.  Granted, it's tough and time is making it a little easier, but I think that it is only because I am learning how to "behave" when I remember.  I felt extremely lucky to have my hunny for the extra year and a half that I got. He died in the ambulance at his accident and if his C1 had chipped 1 mm the other way, he would've died or been paralyzed. Even though that year and a half was hard--I was caregiver for 5 months while he grew in strength and…

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Posted on March 17, 2017 at 9:36pm

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Latest Activity

joe kelly replied to Jade Rogers's discussion Hi!
"Dear Jade, I wish I had some advice for you because when I sign in, I notice that you often sign in I guess to check if anything new has been posted.  Being lonely after losing your Love after so many years together is a major part of all who…"
12 hours ago
Holly Baldwin is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
12 hours ago
Dennis C. and Virginia G are now friends
23 hours ago
Virginia G replied to Pamela philipp's discussion Defeated
"I feel the same.  The website doesn’t help because we aren’t talking and around people in person.  That isn’t even enough when people are willing to talk and most don’t have time for me."
yesterday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"You are right. I became conditioned with my mom. Every health crisis that my mom would have was traumatic for me. And then there would be that ray of light. I would have mom safe at home once again. I developed some false hope. But as time passed…"
yesterday
M Adams commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Baby steps is such a good metaphor — I think when we’ve been traumatized by terrible loss, many of us lose our resilience, and basically have to baby ourselves, setting very tiny goals and challenges, slowly working our way forward.…"
yesterday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Theresa, it's hard for me to be positive about anything. I always feel like something bad is right around the corner. That's because every time I thought mom was safe and had cleared another hurdle, something else would go wrong. It's…"
Saturday
joe kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"It's been a little bit since I shared but it seems like I'm just stuck, out of sync with everything included myself in a way.  It's been like one long endless day.  I don't know how to explain it even.  I'm…"
Saturday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Monty, For some of us, we will always remain out of sync with the rest of world. We, like myself. live in our own universe."
Saturday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Brett you are right that is the "dark" side, it scares me too That is so great about the phone call from the directors at the center, that must have made you feel like a million bucks.   You are making a positive impact, I know…"
Saturday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Avi, I actually looked up the EquoVox. I couldn't find an English link for it. I'll keep looking. I'm just really curious how it works. And I want you to make your own decisions. I just want you to be happy."
Saturday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"M, I'm half Catholic, and Theresa is 100% Catholic. This is a huge part of Catholicism. Ouiji boards just scare the crap out of me. I listened to a lecture series from a Vatican exorcists. There was a question and answer period. Someone asked…"
Saturday
M Adams commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Brett, it gives me such a lift to hear about your new gig — sounds perfect! Lucky kids too, great when they can connect with an adult who also makes them laugh.   Your comment re the spirit world app that Avi came across brought back a…"
Friday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Avi, things like that scare the crap out of me. I mean, how do you know that you are actually communicating with your mom, and not something bad? I believe that you may open yourself to something that may attach itself to you. That's just…"
Friday
Brenda Ann left a comment for Lisa
"Dear Lisa, I send you my heartfelt condolences as well as a welcome to our website. It is a safe place to come and talk or vent about your loss. Talking is very helpful in sorting out how to move forward. I would like to share a paragraph from what…"
Friday
P updated their profile
Friday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"No we should not, God is the only communicator Avi, you are right. We should not disturb the deceased, they are in peace, it is us who are not in peace. I still struggle everyday, I just have come to recognize that this is my new life.  "
Friday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Monty, I m sure everyone on our forum had a very bad day. I just kept myself very busy all. Since I live in Florida and it is in the 70's I worked outside all day long. I feel Julian is with when I am outside. He knew I just loved the outdoors…"
Friday
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi Friends,  Few days back I came to know an app EquoVox which can help you communicate with your loved ones who are deceased. It seems be fake to me but have seen some videos on you tube people claiming its real. Did anybody on this group…"
Friday
Profile IconValerie Groh, diane, Lisa and 6 more joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Thursday

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