I am so sorry. Yes, it is unbearable and yet we find ourselves bearing it, though we don't want to. When you find out what this pain is like it's hard not to think there's a design fault in life. If only we could go when they go. But of course there are so many others that need us desperately. I also think that when they die, that's when our love reaches perfection... But then they're gone so we ache and ache and ache. I can say, though, with certainty that they go on. They still exist. I thought this anyway, but six weeks after my love died he sent me the most amazing, concrete, physical sign that he was there, knowing my thoughts, responding with love, with humour, with undeniable proof of his continued existence after death. Apart from that one, I have had so many signs I can't count them. That sign allowed me to believe all the others, which were always beautiful, but easy for the sceptical to doubt. I know we will be reunited after my death. But it doesn't make this grief any less sharp, strangely. With love, Alice
Hello O.L.Cato, I'm so very sorry for the heartbreak you are enduring, losing your beloved husband. I am thinking of you and wish you at least some moments of calm to help you get through this. My situation is different, but I am also struggling to get through the days without the love of my life, who died suddenly of a stroke a year ago. I hope you feel less alone in your suffering by reading what other people are going through. With love, Alice
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Welcome to Online Grief Support - A Social Community
"Avi, I feel like you are going through a rough time right now. You're not alone. One of the great things about a site like this is that you are a world away but I know who you are and I know that you are missing your mom just as much as I am.…"
"My mom worried about every detail of my life. There are some who would say that is intrusive. I felt that she was just being a mom. I miss that so much. I had the flu last year. I was laying in that bed and all I could hear was silence. My mom would…"
"Good morning Adams. It is 9:40 AM in India and I am at my job and trying to concentrate hard as my Mom always wanted.
I have almost stopped complaining of anything in life now as I have already lost my most precious gift. Now what ever I have…"
"Avi, the fact that you were close enough with your mother to share your negative feelings about your job shows real intimacy, which I think is what loving mothers treasure above all else. So hard accepting that we will not hear that beloved…"
"Even my mother always used to say that live your life fully but I was always complaining on some matters. She used to worry about me the most as I was not stable in my job and used to talk about quitting it often. She always used to say, love your…"
"Alice, I regret not getting it together to write on Dec 2nd as I recall that was your anniversary of your husbands death date. I have just been swimming upstream through the rapids. Each year during the "seasonal"…"
"You know what when my mom could not be resuscitated, her eyes were wide open and looking toward the right towards me as I walked in, she saw me I know it. I shut her eyes. I wanted the hospital staff to leave me alone. They were…"
"SelV, your mom would have had it no other way. She saw you take your first breath. You saw her take her last. I experienced that as well. If I had my way, I would have gone before my mom. Is that selfish of me? Yes. I don't care. Losing mom was…"
"Dear all...the thought "What if I had died due to unforeseen circumstances and my elderly widowed mother had to grief my death?" crossed my mind many times. Knowing my mother, her world (of me and her) would have collapsed and she would…"
"I think you're right, Theresa. We are a sad bunch. I think our moms would be touched that we love them so much, but they would probably also want us to be happy and move on. I just don't think that's possible, nor do I believe that my…"
"So I have been really busy at work and with moving, but of course at night when I get in bed I cry and cry.
I finally have come to realize this will be the new normal I guess, I do not think I will every stop missing my mom ever..."
Cancer is indeed a plague. Death from cancer is only part of the story. The journey from diagnosis to death is horrific and overwhelming. Even though cancer effects a lot of people, there are so many that just don't understand how…"