"Life is life and very few ever experience becoming one with someone. Those few died when they died. Now it's just waiting to go to them because we know they can't come back. Every day is the same day for me. Today…"
Your words ring the truth of all of us on this forum. Tuesday, Jonathan a 24 year father of three children (My most favorite maintenance person) was death at the scene of an auto accident. They revived him and now he is on life support…"
"This was a letter I wrote to a friend about three months after my husband died. Not much has changed after six plus years...........
I've been sick with a sore throat and today was another wickedly brutal crying day. There is nothing that…"
"So glad you found the picture in his wallet, Linda, that must have been such a sweet discovery for you. My father carries a photo of my mother in his wallet, but he only started doing it after her death last fall, so it doesn’t have quite the…"
"Hello M Adams,
You had a wonderful caring Husband who thought only of you during his illness. My heart goes out to you. You were so blessed just like me. I finally went through my Husband's wallet after 6 years and found a picture of me an…"
"Just wanted to mention a strange discovery that I came across a few days ago. My father, who was visiting here for the first time since my husband’s death, had a business appointment and needed a suitable bag for documents, iPad etc.…"
"Linda, it could be my computer. I let Windows and Firefox and McAfee install updates. Something must be clashing with something. If it's working for you, then it's not this web site so I don't think Ninja can…"
I do see the picture of your wife. She is a very pretty. When I post my pictures I do see them before I post. I didn't do anything special, maybe it is your computer.
Morgan, I am right there with you on your thoughts. Why do I…"
"i'm not going to do this. i'm not going to make it. i cannot live without him. i want out. i just had another meltdown.
Then I read the latest posts and I too don't want to let my husband down but I…"
"I see the communion photo, and a while back there were multiple copies of the adult one of your wife that you posted, but after a while, maybe a day or so after that posting, only one image remained. Did Ninja have any guidance on why you…"
"I want to do a pic test here now to see what happens. I didn't make any changer to settings since rejoining and they look to be at the defaults. In the beginning, I was able to see the pics I posted along with you guys seeing…"
I feel the same thoughts that you do. I will let nature take it's course and I will not seek medical intervention to keep me longer on this earth. I would take my life in a minute if it wasn't for my religious belief that I will…"
I think John has said everything I am feeling each day. I sometimes think during the day of how many of us are out there suffering through this pain. It has been almost two years for me, so, I guess, after three there is still no relief or hope in sight. I feel nothing, and for those who tell you are now free to do things; they are crazy. Why would I want to be free of my love who made all the things we did worthwhile, meaningful, and happy?
Everyone who had a love will someday lose them; it is inevitable. They will then, and only then, understand our thoughts and pain.
I do not wish it on anyone.
Elynn, I can relate to your situation as it parallels mine perfectly. First, I am sorry for our loss. I am aware there are no words that can take away the sting, the inconsolable pain of your loss. I lost my Nancy, April 29th of last year and am still and will for a long time be facing the hell of loneliness, the emptiness and the never ending longing for that person who defined you and was always there for you, your soul mate and best friend. That was Nancy. Now, I too cannot drive and have a limited social network, again, apart from this grief site. I live exclusively on social security and can barely make that last, but I do. I wake up broken and go to sleep broken, spending the day lost and wandering through my empty house, more like a tomb than a home. We are all so vulnerable to to the world we must live in and on that day I do not wake up, I hope to wake up in the arms of my true love, my beautiful Nancy. I pray the same for you and everyone who must endure this cold empty life. May God watch over you and bless you and take care of yourself...Mel
Anyone else feeling lonely and depresxed? I have trouble getting out if the house because I do not drive. My husband used to go everywhere with me. It's really lonely and depressing having to stay in the house all day (luckily my son is here daily). Too hot to go outside (here in the desert ). Wish I had something to look forward to.
My heart goes out to you. Your last comment is worrisome. I don't know what to say to help you other than pls find strength from the love of your lovely wife to keep going. Take care of yourself. Praying for comfort and peace for you and all others including myself.
Hello all. I have been relentlessly seeking. Sorry to be away so long but I am very unhealthy and don't want to spread it. There is hope for you if you truly want it. I however do not. I find peace in the agony that grows deeper each day. With much understanding comes great suffering.
Just want to say Jon-Paul I appreciate your recent posts. "I rendezvous with my Queen daily. I've never felt closer to Her". I found that absolutely beautiful. That is what I am aiming for with my love. It seems the only option to survive this nightmare. To "seek ruthlessly" - if you ever care to share what has been your journey I would be interested to hear.
John-Paul- I want to thank you for creating this community. It's help me more then any counseling or medication or doctors could of ever have helped. This is one of the most difficult and painful times in anyones life. And to be able to communicate with other people who are experiencing the heartbreaking, life-changing, loss of a soulmate.... It's proving to be of sincere importance. So- thank you John-Paul.
"The triggers are one of the hardest thing. Just hearing a song, driving down a familiar street, a smell, a television show, can all bring back a painful memory. Even if they invoke a nice memory, it still hurts because of lost time, not being able…"
"Thank you so much! It hurts, but it helps to share with others. Some days are better than others & there are triggers. I am so happy for Avi, his daughter & father. She will love having her grandfather there. I…"
"Sue, if we can ever answer any questions that you may have about what you are experiencing, please let us know. Everyone's story is different, but the feeling of loss that we all have is familiar. This is a group of people who understand."
"Avi, it's amazing how the Lord took care of both you and your dad. As happy as I am for you, I think I may be even more happy for your dad. This gives him a reason to get up in the morning, and gives him someone to focus that lost love on.
"Guys my little girl has moved on with me now after spending 8 months at her maternal grand mother's place. Now me, my wife and my father lives together. My father who was alone after my mother's death has a new hope and motivation to live…"
I am creating this site for the many of us who have suffered several losses. I lost my mom, dad, grandma(2nd mom), grandpa, my beloved dog and divorce.Many of us have lost more than one person or event.Come share!See More
"Sue, I am so sorry. I know. Believe me, we know. And I wish that I could say something more.
Something horrible happened to me today. The worst possible thing that could have happened, beyond losing my dog. I'm not sick or anything, but my…"
"iv loss lot of pepplee iv lovd dealy to big c
got to say gud by to sum 1 iv new for ovf 36 yrs to big c
im her oldeds nbor i am
iv lovd her dealyy still do i do iv lovd dead pepelel for yrs if no 1 gets it no 1 will only on hear thy do"
"iv smeltt beef gravyy on off lastt few dayss dad luvd beef he did evenn beef gravy he did lk his arond
iv learndd lots off spook churchh i ahv hav
seertenn smellls let u no thy hear
evn told me i need to slow get a/r in my body sortedd to lk i…"
but i o to spirtt churchh i di it giv me ansersss it did
told me to livmy life i do it did
1 of familyy cum trhu agan
its tim i put m sf 1st iv pitnorhterts 1st for 2 long now tim to put me 1st"
"This was my first holiday without my Mom. She passed in March 2019. Good Friday was rough. I was looking forward to spending a long weekend with her. Trying to stay busy, but I miss her so much. Mornings are really bad…"
"Thanks for thinking of me Avi — hope you’re doing well and enjoying your little girl. This is the first Easter without my mother. Losing her has really changed things, it seems that she and I (and my husband) were the ones who…"