Kevin Bailey
  • Male
  • Reading, PA
  • United States
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  • Julie
  • Michael
  • emma
  • Michael Thompson

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Latest Activity

Kevin Bailey commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I was in denial even when they was talking about hospice. I was thinking she's not going anywhere, we're in recovery mood but I do need a nurse to help me with some things. Cancer is a wicked disease and it took my beautiful wife through…"
3 hours ago
M Adams replied to Kevin Bailey's discussion I really hate this new life in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Really relate to what you say here, Kevin. t's strange how things can be comforting and painful at the same time. We never had any photographs of each other on display, but after my husband died it was one of the first things I did, getting…"
yesterday
Kevin Bailey replied to Kevin Bailey's discussion I really hate this new life in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Robin I feel the same way, I just feel a little comfort being surrounded by her pictures but I can't really look at them for too long because I just wanna go back to that time. My grief is apart of me, it's a wound that will never heal or…"
yesterday
Maxey replied to Kevin Bailey's discussion Choosing someone in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Kevin, You are right about the dreaming. Every night I go to sleep hoping to dream of my husband; it is the only peaceful part of my day. I lay there in the dark thinking of him, but when I awake in the morning, the horror and reality of a another…"
Monday
Robin Quinn replied to Kevin Bailey's discussion I really hate this new life in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Almost at the 15 month mark of losing my soulmate, my heart of over 29 years.  The pain doesn't go away, you just learn to live with it.  I still cry daily, I can almost talk about my husband without crying, almost, I can look back on…"
Apr 18
Steinberg replied to Kevin Bailey's discussion Choosing someone in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Dear Trina, thank you for your kind words and open heart. Best wishes."
Apr 15
Trina Mamoon replied to Kevin Bailey's discussion Choosing someone in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Hello Jerry, You describe our existence so well. Our "so-called" life that began after our beloved spouse passed is one that "normal" people have no inkling about, how cruel and unforgiving it is. Most of my waking hours is one…"
Apr 15
Trina Mamoon replied to Kevin Bailey's discussion Choosing someone in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Dear S M,  I just read your profile. I cannot even begin to imagine what it is like to be in your shoes. As devastating and life altering as it was and has been for me to watch Joseph lose his battle to lung cancer, we had nine months together…"
Apr 15
Kathleen Jordan replied to Kevin Bailey's discussion Choosing someone in the group Lost My Spouse...
"I entirely understand this. Lately, I'm spending so much more time sleeping, but I don't have bad dreams anymore. I have dreams that I remember, and he's usually in them.  I smile when I see him...even if it is in dreams. I try…"
Apr 14
Steinberg replied to Kevin Bailey's discussion Choosing someone in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Hello Trina, thanks for sharing your thoughts. I had not really ever thought of it the way you describe. At first I thought it should have been me and not him who was killed. Reason being that he was such an extraordinary person who added so much to…"
Apr 14
Steinberg replied to Kevin Bailey's discussion Choosing someone in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Dear Kevin, know so much what you are talking about. Another painful aspect of grief is the tendency for people to compare and compete - I have no time for any of that. But I often was made to feel as if my grief was in someway less or less…"
Apr 14
Trina Mamoon replied to Kevin Bailey's discussion Choosing someone in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Hello Kevin, It's so true what you say about choosing our spouse, life partner. The rest of our family members, as much as we love them, we didn't choose them. Your post made me feel very sad--a strange thing to say since I have been more…"
Apr 14
Kevin Bailey added a discussion to the group Lost My Spouse...
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Choosing someone

As much as I truly and dearly love my kids, there's just something very , very different about the relationship we have with our spouses whom We choose out of everyone in this world to love, honor and obey. There's a sacred bond that makes two people, one. When my beautiful wife was here and I would have bad dreams about something happening to her, I would be so very relieved to wake up and she's right beside me. Now its the Opposite. My relief is in my dreams when I sleep and my nightmare is…See More
Apr 14
Kevin Bailey commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I hate sunny days, when I see couples holding hands and walking their dog or just outside enjoying the weather, I tear up and soon sin sink even deeper into this quicksand of depression. Rainy, stormy days match my mood better. I look forward to the…"
Apr 13
Kevin Bailey replied to Kevin Bailey's discussion I really hate this new life in the group Lost My Spouse...
"I really appreciate that Jon- Paul, much love and respect to you and everybody else in this support group. You beautiful people are even closer to me than some of my own family and so called friends. We understand eachother and unlike most people I…"
Apr 12
Jon-Paul Ackerman replied to Kevin Bailey's discussion I really hate this new life in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Kevin, welcome to a sacrificial life of fatherhood. It is a cold, dark place where everyone expects u to chin up and smile. It gets worse as well. However, we can understand how to provide the best support for all Our children's circumstances.…"
Apr 12

Profile Information

About Me:
Nice, fun loving guy who just loves God, family and people.
About my Loss:
I lost the love of my beautiful wife to this horrible disease called cancer. We fought so long to beat it and she tried her best to stay as long as she could. It hurts my heart to have seen what this disease did to my beautiful wife, she or nobody on this earth deserves to be put through that pain. I honestly don't know how I'm gonna be able to go on from here. I feel so lost.

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Comment Wall (7 comments)

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At 3:32pm on January 28, 2017, Michael said…
Hi Kevin
Saw your name come up and thought i'd say hi. Hope you are having a decent day (ive had maybe 2 so far). See you in person one day i hope. Take care pal.
At 1:08pm on January 28, 2017, Carl accomando said…
Kevin,I know what cancer did to my wife no should have to suffer the way she did the treatment put her in the hospital many times but the last time she could not recover it breaks my heart when I think about all she went through she came close to death many times and came back the last time we thought she'd do it again but her body was to ravaged by this horrible disease and it took her so i understand the feeling just hope where she is now knows no pain only happiness and peace.
At 2:06pm on January 04, 2017, emma gave Kevin Bailey a gift
Gift
my thoughts and prayers are always with u
At 10:26pm on December 15, 2016, Pamela philipp said…
Kevin so sorry for your loss I lost my husband 15 months ago and it feels like yesterday and Michael you are right it's the hardest thing to ever have to deal with
At 3:33pm on November 22, 2016, Fran said…

Kevin, the first year tears you apart. It doesn't seem real in some respects. You survive(willing or not) thru the first birthdays without your soulmate...the first anniversary, the first Thanksgiving and Christmas, etc. People may not know what to say to you, but they more or less check in periodically. After the first year is over, most people kind of forget your situation. They feel you should've moved on. Unfortunately, this is when you could use their help the most because you really come to the realization that your loved is well and truly gone and that NOTHING is as it was and life SUCKS! I have gotten to the point where I don't do anything I don't want...or see anyone I don't want to see. I know I'm stuck. I miss having my playmate, my confidant, my cheerleader, my sounding board...I'm sorry we are all in this together, but, this site helps me a lot. 

At 2:33pm on November 16, 2016, Michael said…
Kevin
So sorry for your loss. Your wife was beautiful. Im 30 days in, and it is the toughest thing i've ever had to deal with.
At 9:06am on November 16, 2016, Julie said…
I am so very sorry for your loss. I lost my soul mate on Oct. 10, 2016 and I am lost without him. I will pray for you and your family.
 
 
 

Latest Activity

morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Digging deeper in my hole again........of course I'm not sure I mean, again......it seems like i think I emerge but then there I am again........digging furiously so I can escape.  This is the hardest, most painful, most misunderstood…"
3 hours ago
Kevin Bailey commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I was in denial even when they was talking about hospice. I was thinking she's not going anywhere, we're in recovery mood but I do need a nurse to help me with some things. Cancer is a wicked disease and it took my beautiful wife through…"
3 hours ago
Kathleen Jordan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I soo believe that....I see him, or feel him every day...It's hard to stay posititve...but   it works"
4 hours ago
Crystal joined Katherine Ellis's group
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Losing Someone to Cancer

This is for anyone who has lost somone to cancer. I lost my adopted Mom to breast cancer some years ago. She was everything I could have asked for. She loved me because I was just me. She also loved my family and children as if they were her own.See More
4 hours ago
Crystal commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Yeah, Ben was told 5 months at christmas, but he made it 3 months. It was fast and aggressive. He was on hospice for 1.5 months. He was up and walking around after his brain surgery in july, did great all the way till chriatmas, but the cancer came…"
4 hours ago
Kathleen Jordan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Crystal...you were lucky to have enough  time to learn while he was on hospice....I had 3  whole days of coherence.  But, I seriously did appreciate  it, even though he thought he was going to make 6 months"
5 hours ago
BLUEBELL commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I have been blessed with a very understanding set of people at work. They have told me to take my time coming back to work and have ask if there is anything they can do to help, just ask. They knew how much my life was centered on taking care of my…"
5 hours ago
Heather commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi Theresa, It is the same for me in terms of my job. I'm a special education assistant and have worked with kids for over 20 years with varying special needs. The last 5 years I have specialized in working with children with autism. I started…"
6 hours ago
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Heather I feel the same way and the weather here has been the same I'm in Pennsylvania You were not rambling It just lets me know I'm not alone Are used to always look forward to summer to go to the pool see my friends now I feel like I…"
6 hours ago
Heather commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi Theresa, I understand what you are talking about. I work in a very large school and have been there for 3 years and no one acknowledged or asked about how my mom was doing (I had to take some days off in the last month of the last school year to…"
7 hours ago
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"No Bluebell, any death is difficult for all of us right now. Sometimes though I feel numb towards others that have lost a loved one I have people come in to my place of employment all the time (jewelry store) that have lost parents and they seem so…"
8 hours ago
Crystal commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Same here. I've never been on my own. His beING on hospice , though he was able to stay at home, he was completely immobile, so I learned how to do all the things most men would do naturally, even paying bills, which I never have done. So he…"
8 hours ago
Jackie cooke commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I know, it shouldn't have happend and the thought of another 30 odd years alone terrifies me"
9 hours ago
Crystal commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"When I said "til death do us part" during our wedding vows, I never thought that that would ever happen.. I didn't mean it. He's still apart of me."
10 hours ago
Jackie cooke commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I'm just the same,,it's still we, us, ours I don't want to be I, me or mine. I signed an email jackie n Shirl the other day, realised what I'd done and it nearly killed me. I never want to be a single person"
11 hours ago
M Adams commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Not sure what is normal, but I do that too -- it's normal to me and I haven't tried to change it. It's not so much that I can't bring myself to use the past tense, more that the present still seems natural to me when something…"
11 hours ago
Crystal commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Does anybody else here have issues with talking about your spouse as if they are still with us? I can't bring myself to use my husbands name in the form of the past. I still say things like "my husband and I like...' or "ben IS a…"
12 hours ago
BLUEBELL commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"My best friends parrot died yesterday and it is hitting me very hard. I am not dealing with it well right now. Lots of tears and sadness. Will this never stop? I do not think it is all about the parrot. It is tied in with my Mom's death…"
15 hours ago
silvia maria posted blog posts
16 hours ago
Chum commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I"
19 hours ago

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