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Lost My Spouse...

Members: 371
Latest Activity: May 20

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Today is the anniversary of my wedding day 2 Replies

I got married on May 1, 1992 and lost my husband on June 30, 2017. My wedding day was the happiest day of my life and if I had one wish, it would be to go back and live that day over. It has been…Continue

Started by Carol Klotz. Last reply by Carol Klotz May 3.

Lost my light in the darkness 2 Replies

I lost my wife on the 25 of March after returning from my Dads funeral. She is everything to me. No matter how bad it got, no matter how much my PTSD drug me down, She has been my light in the…Continue

Started by Shane Hughes. Last reply by Shane Hughes Apr 16.

Lost my husband the father of my kids and bestfriend . 5 Replies

  I lost my husband we were high school sweethearts we had plans and it was not suppose to be this way we had two kids together and I feel so lost and the pain i feel becuase of how much I miss him…Continue

Started by Nicole. Last reply by Wendy Apr 7.

My Love 1 Reply

On November 6 of this year, I lost my husband in a tragic automobile accident. We live in Georgia and the accident was in Montana making it more difficult. I am completely lost as we were best…Continue

Started by Kathy West. Last reply by Anna Chris Apr 7.

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Comment by Donna M Dowling-Hall on April 1, 2015 at 6:21pm

I have lost my faith.  I am still angry with God and blame him. 

 

Comment by George H on April 1, 2015 at 4:45pm
Mary was a true believer she told her daughter that she was right with Christ and she could go anytime myself I'm still searching for answers but I hope then when she closed her eyes for the last time that it was all she expected
Comment by Tildyc on April 1, 2015 at 3:57pm
George, John T and m morgan- Thank you for sharing your opinions/thoughts on the afterlife and where you feel our loved ones may have gone. I was raised by my parents and my mom is very religious. She is a sweet and loving woman my mother and a saint in her own right. And her faith keeps her strong and has helped her through 85 yrs and everything that life throws at you when you live that long. Myself personally – as I've grown older, I've begun questioning everything that I was taught in the church when I was growing up. Ive never been what you would call a devout church goer or religious. But now that my soul mate has "disappeared" I truly feel there is a different answer from what I have been told all this time. I do feel at a gut level that there is an afterlife for us. And I'm sure most of us heard that energy never goes away, it just changes form. That is scientific fact. So it stands to reason that the energy from people who pass must go somewhere. I prefer to call this energy- our spirit/soul. And the first couple weeks that my Mark was gone, I felt his presence. I do not know how to explain it. He showed up mainly in my dreams. But these dreams were like no other dream I've ever had before. They were far beyond just lucid. There was a physical aspect to them somehow. A tingling sensation in my upper body and a voice in my head that woke me up a couple of times. The voice was not my own and I felt it more than I heard it. If that makes any sense. And I know it was Mark's voice. I realize all this sounds strange but I don't know how else to explain it. So plz don't banned me from our site because you guys might think that my cheese is slipping off my cracker. It's something that's been on my mind since Mark went away.

m morgan- what you shared- interests me. It sounds a little complicated but I would like to explore this a little more. I'll do a Internet search on this subject to start. If you have websites or other information to suggest, I'd appreciate it.
Comment by George H on April 1, 2015 at 2:25pm
Thank you Sandy
Comment by Sandy Elaine Norris on April 1, 2015 at 12:57pm

I'm right there with you George. Everyday seems to be a little harder than the next. I wish I could help make your heart lighter.

Comment by George H on April 1, 2015 at 11:54am
just another heart wrenching lonely day don't know what to do seems like it doesn't get easier it seems to get harder and harder darker and darker don't think anyone can ever figure this out
Comment by Sandy Elaine Norris on April 1, 2015 at 6:09am

Uncontrollable sadness, unending loneliness

Comment by morgan on April 1, 2015 at 1:29am

Tildyc,

You asked earlier about belief and is there an afterlife?  Like George I was brought up Catholic but about 12 I realized it was not my cup of tea.  I needed answers not hanging my hat on some supernatural story that no one could prove.  From the day my husband died I started reading, researching and studying physics because they are trying to prove where we come from and where we go.  This time I was looking for answers that weren't quite readily available but the theories are better than the best of the old Catholic doctrines for me. 

I think space is filled with an energy vibrating at a different level all the time.  Sometimes it comes together to form matter and other times it falls apart. It all depends on the frequency of the vibration.  This "energy" is really information (the consciousness of the universe). Information that our brain processes and spits out what we perceive as reality.  Our brain is sort of a projector screen for the movie, for the information/energy we call reality.  I think string theory and  parallel universes are a plausible idea to help explain the big (classical physics)and the very very small (quantum mechanics).  Much of it has been proven and the universe functions exactly like they have surmised.  My husband and your loved one must be connecting from somewhere in some dimension otherwise why would we feel so strong about their absence. Their energy is still vibrating somewhere.  It must be.  I also think that we were connected at some point before we even met here on this planet.  I think we travelled together in some capacity before we hooked up here otherwise why would I have been so attracted to him here out of all the millions of people I could have been with.  There has to be something that brings that energy together in this physical form and I want to believe that I will be reunited with that energy when I leave this physical body.

 

I would never have studied physics if I wasn't searching so hard for an answer as to why I have been in soooo much pain from my husband's death. But over the past two years it has been the one thing that has made some sense to me as to this thing we call death. 

 

Today I went all day without crying. That is a first in weeks and weeks.  Maybe I'll have a second day too.  That would be a bonus. This has been the hardest thing I have ever had to do and when I read about how we all wonder how we are going to make it through I can only say that when you wake up you end up making it through because your body overules your mind.  It is going to have another day no matter what your mind says.  And days change.  None are the same now.  Crying comes at you like a slingshot.  No rules.  Just coping.

 

Enough for now.  Jus thought I'd throw my two cents in the ring.

Comment by Sandy Elaine Norris on March 31, 2015 at 10:20pm

I am empty!!!

Comment by Tildyc on March 31, 2015 at 9:15pm
Just got back from a dog walk. Here in Southeast Alaska its a rain forest. Just not tropical. Anyways it was pouring-pouring- pouring rain out side when we walked. And on this walk I was thinking... during a walk that it rained like this, either Mark was with me or he was at home making dinner for us. And I remember how cozy and happy I would feel when I got home and dinner smelled so good and the rain was pounding on the roof and we're sitting down to eat and we had each other. It was the most amazing and content feeling. The rain made me happy. This evening– I cried my way thru the rainy walk and I cried when I came home in the rain. Now the overcast skies and the pouring rain make me feel lonely, dark and empty. Nothing feels like it is ever going to be good again.
 

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