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Traumatic, Sudden Loss

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Traumatic, Sudden Loss

I have started this group for people who like myself have suddenly, tragically and traumatically lost a loved one.

My mom died 8 weeks ago (August 17, 2009) She had been sick but I did not know the true extent of her illness. Her doctor knew she did not have long and I went to each doctor visit and talked to him at the hospital and he never told me and I do not believe mom knew either. I am not sure.

I found my mom sitting up on her bed and I know I knew she was gone. I still am in deep shock and cry occasionally but only a minute or two. Then I am back to not feeling or feel numb.

Discussion Forum

first time posting 1 Reply

Not sure how to begin as I haven't really talked about this much so pardon me if I just start...My little sister was murdered ( rather brutally) two years ago...since then I have been fighting with a…Continue

Started by Matthew Wilson. Last reply by Gabrielle yesterday.

Been over a year, it's still hard. 3 Replies

I never dreamed my wife would die so young, I have met some friends, but I still can't connect. I still will lay at night staring at nothing, still numb to the loss of my wife of 35 years.Wish there…Continue

Started by Ross johnson. Last reply by stewart p on Wednesday.

It seems to get harder, not easier 5 Replies

I feel so alone.I reached out to this group briefly after I lost the love of my life almost exactly six months ago.  I haven't been able to come back much, as I felt like my heart was breaking even…Continue

Started by Jennifer. Last reply by dawn larvan on Tuesday.

34 is just too young 7 Replies

I'd known my boyfriend since we were in middle school together. I didn't succumb to his charm and persistence until I was about 28 years old. We were absolutely inseparable once we started dating. We…Continue

Started by bryana. Last reply by rachel_michelle on Monday.

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Comment by Gabrielle on Tuesday
I am also fed up of hearing that my sister is in a better place. I'm pretty sure she'd rather be continuing her dream of seeing the world rather than sitting as a pile of ash in an urn. She was only 22 years old.
Comment by Michele on Tuesday

I feel the same way it makes me so mad for someone to tell me my sister is in a better place and what a great life she had, I'm sorry she just turned 50 she should have many more happy years ahead of her and the same with my brother in law. Its so depressing to see how life just seems to go on for everyone and I am drowning in grief and depression. The more time that goes along I just see how much of a void there is in my life. Its hard for me to cope with the fact that my life will never be the same. No more holidays or no more dinners no more sister trips. I try to go through the motions of work and day to day life but I still find myself crying daily and hearing a song or seeing something that just floods the realization that i will never see her again .........

Comment by Felicia Evans on Monday
I feel like that too. Every time I think about the future without my more like a brother nephew it makes me feel some kind of way. I still can't believe he's gone, especially on a day like today. He always invited me and my husband to spend holidays with him and his family. He knew I couldn't have kids and it warmed my heart to be around him and my 7 great nieces and nephews. He also told me he loved being around us. We often talked about how we were going to look and be when we got old together. I don't take anything for granted anymore. I can't imagine my life without him. We were so close. I'm tired of people telling me he's in a better place or everything happens for a reason and all of the rest of those cliches' I love and miss him and I wish he were here. For now, I go on...like I said, one day at a time. The nights after my husband goes to bed, are the hardest.
Comment by Gabrielle on Monday
I agree, it is better to let it out and have a little (or big!) cry whenever we want to. I'm a firm believer in feeling grief and not trying to bottle things up or keep myself so busy that I'm not dealing with anything. It's good to have a routine of course and to make plans. But I never want to stop myself thinking about my sister. At the moment my love for her is the reason for my misery but I hope one day it will be the reason for me to continue. We'll see. I am yet to see the light because I only want to see her, not a future without her.
Comment by Felicia Evans on Monday
Take time every day to do something in memory of your love one. I know it is so hard right now. I'm taking one day at a time, one minute at a time. I was just folding laundry and this sadness came over me...I just want to cry. I allow myself to cry for a little while. Then I get up and keep going one step at a time. Peace be with you on this day and the days ahead.
Comment by JO B alexio on May 22, 2015 at 3:24pm

2 day is 1 of my low days 

Comment by Breana on May 17, 2015 at 10:54pm

Hope everyone is getting by better each day. Can't believe it's been a little over a week for me. Even though I'm young, when you find your soulmate you can't fathom being with another person and I have no interest in that whatsoever. Been looking more into the spiritual aspect of things for the first time and just trying to live on like he would if I passed, one day I'll see him again. I'll keep on keeping on just for that moment. Never thought I'd be a widower from here on out but it's worth it for the end result to see him. My heart goes out to everyone else grieving at this time.

Comment by Felicia Evans on May 17, 2015 at 5:13pm
Hi
Comment by Denise on May 17, 2015 at 4:21pm
Hi
Comment by JO B alexio on May 17, 2015 at 3:41pm

me 2 felica sorry 4 evrys loss new 1s on hear as well old 1s on hear

i no 1 thn we ask why me we do we wil ask it evry day why me

 

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Fran left a comment for kathleen akin
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