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Traumatic, Sudden Loss

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Latest Activity: on Thursday

Traumatic, Sudden Loss

I have started this group for people who like myself have suddenly, tragically and traumatically lost a loved one.

My mom died 8 weeks ago (August 17, 2009) She had been sick but I did not know the true extent of her illness. Her doctor knew she did not have long and I went to each doctor visit and talked to him at the hospital and he never told me and I do not believe mom knew either. I am not sure.

I found my mom sitting up on her bed and I know I knew she was gone. I still am in deep shock and cry occasionally but only a minute or two. Then I am back to not feeling or feel numb.

Discussion Forum

NOT COPING, NEED HELP! 12 Replies

Hi everyone.I really need some help/advice. I am at the point now where I don't know what can be done.I am finding it hard to cope with this right now as my best friend just died a month ago and I am…Continue

Started by Lee Evans. Last reply by Steve Suehiro on Thursday.

loss of 16 year old boyfriend 9 Replies

He was walking me home and when we stopped in front of my house he was about to leave but I asked him to stay a little longer to talk to me like always and being the sweet person that he is, he did.…Continue

Started by PotatoLord. Last reply by Stanley Ruiz Jun 23.

NEW AT THIS

Im sitting here in front of my computer and feel like bursting into tears. cant seem to understand how this works and how to talk to others.After loading some photos of my daughter, I just cant…Continue

Started by Sharon Robertson Jun 23.

first time posting 2 Replies

Not sure how to begin as I haven't really talked about this much so pardon me if I just start...My little sister was murdered ( rather brutally) two years ago...since then I have been fighting with a…Continue

Started by Matthew Wilson. Last reply by Matthew Wilson Jun 18.

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Comment by Steve Suehiro on Thursday

Erin,  I am sorry to hear this.  When I came home and found my wife I saw immediately that she was gone - I am a funeral director after all and it would have been obvious to anyone.  911 still had me pull her off the bed and start chest compressions.  I can remember crying and doing the compressions even though I knew that it was hopeless since it appeared she had died likely a short time after I had left for work that morning.   I too feel quite helpless since there is absolutely nothing I can do to bring her back.

Dave,  loss of a soulmate is devastating whether you were together only 3 months, 3 years, or 30.  Don't listen to people telling you unhelpful crap like that.  They may mean well, but they don't really understand how any of us feel. 

Comment by Richard Barns on Thursday

I lost my boyfriend 5 weeks ago suddenly. Funeral only 10 days ago, and people telling me I shouldn't be grieving as we was only together 3 months, well he was taken from me too soon, but we had a great relationship even if only 3 months but doesn't make the pain any less, I miss my Dave so much. I just wanna be with him. Dave was 40 and I'm 41. Xxxxxxxxxxxxx Miss my number one Geezer so so much.My Dave

Comment by Erin on Thursday

To Janet Hunter

I lost my boyfriend of 9 years almost the same way. He died on May 20 in bed. He started choking or couldn't breathe. I knew he died then. I saw him exhale his last breath. When the paramedics got there just like you stilled hoped that I was wrong and maybe they could save him. Now is gone and I need him back in my life. I miss him more than any words can express. When they told me he was gone they said his heart was as big as a basketball. I feel defeated because there is nothing I can do to bring him back. I will never be the same person. I will always carry this sorrow in whatever is left of my shattered heart.

Comment by Lisa Y on Wednesday

I'm sorry Janet, I lost my husband to a heart attack 6 weeks ago.  He was my world too.  We didn't have any kids together.  Just us and our dog. 

Comment by Janet Hunter on Wednesday

I am new to this site.  I lost my husband Wil, 11 weeks ago.  Massive coronary in our bed.  I don't know how to carry on.  My world is gone.

Comment by Gabrielle on June 21, 2015 at 3:20am
Today is Fathers Day and I am fortunate that my Dad is still here. However today I will see a broken man; mourning the death of his youngest daughter (my sister) 4 months ago. My heart goes out to everyone for whom Fathers Day is forever changed xx
Comment by Felicia Evans on June 20, 2015 at 7:43pm
Thank you JO B Alexis. I'm so sorry for your loss too.
Comment by JO B alexio on June 20, 2015 at 4:12pm

so sorrry felcia 

my dad died in 2012 nw 2 moreo t fathrs day all i cn do is let ballons off 4 him i cn

Comment by Felicia Evans on June 19, 2015 at 4:44am
Hi everyone. I am so sorry for your loss. My dad passed away in 2010. I still miss him a lot. He was so funny, smart, and he always knew just to say. My great nieces and nephew's dad passed away this past November. It is devastating for them, especially the oldest ones. Plus he passed away suddenly. So while I am grieving the loss of my dad, I'm trying to comfort them too. I allow myself to cry because crying is healing. As for Father's Day, I'm at the point now where I celebrate my dad's life for Father's Day. It's tough but I do it. It's hard when I see all the stuff in the stores but I ignore it for the most part. For my nephew's birthday I took his older kids to his gravesite and we spent time there together. I let them talk, cry, play music low, and I suggested they each bring a balloon to let go. They did and it was very therapeutic. I even let one go too. I overheard them talking and they are going to do the same thing on Father's Day. I'm glad it helped in some small way. It is still tough dealing with the loss but we were able to honor their dad in some way. Of course I almost lost it when I saw his baby daughter siting on the ground near her dad's gravesite. I held it together for them and cried a little. It really helped...if only for a moment. We need to allow ourselves to grieve. The only way to it is to go through it. The feelings don't go away they just get more bearable...one day at a time.
Comment by Gabrielle on June 19, 2015 at 1:17am
Hi Denise. How about a framed photo of your husband and his son?
 

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