"Morgan,
Thank you; I sometimes hesitate to speak (type) the truth of how this is for me, as the last thing I want to do is make it worse for anyone else. At the same time, I know that it helped me to find others online whose truth was similar to…"
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Deborah Dodds
- Female
- La Quinta, CA
- United States
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Deborah Dodds's Groups
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Tattoo Memorial
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Losing SomeoneTo Murder
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Murder Victims Families
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mY sOuLmAtE, mY bEsTfRiE…
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Traumatic, Sudden Loss
943 members
Deborah Dodds's Discussions
murder forumI
1 Reply
ONE DAY THERE WAS A MURDER FORMUM POSTED AND i JOINED BUT AI DON'T SEE IT AS ONE OF THE FORUMS please help
Started this discussion. Last reply by Jarvis Jun 25, 2011.
Almost one year since I lost my husband, I need help Please?
5 Replies
It will be one year on May 31st that my husband was brutally murdered at the prison he was at. He was coming home in 2 years. He was/is my best friend, lover, husband, soul mate. When we met we…Continue
Started this discussion. Last reply by Deborah Dodds Jun 17, 2011.
How do I get my zest back for living?
1 Reply
I just don't care about my goals and dreams anymore because Randy waS a part of those goals and all of my dreams. I just don't have the momtivation or the get up and go like I used to. I'm so sad…Continue
Started this discussion. Last reply by Jarvis Jun 25, 2011.
I'm having a difficult moment
2 Replies
This whole month has been difficult for me being that it is the one year mark on the 31st. I just don't care about anything. (tears) Just last month I was motivated to return to school and today I…Continue
Started this discussion. Last reply by Deborah Dodds Jun 6, 2011.
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Profile Information
- About Me:
- I am a 53 year old widow now who is a full time student and intern for a Drug abuse program. My goal is to become licensed and work in a dual diagnosis facility.
- About my Loss:
- One year ago on May 31, 2010 my husband was brutally murdered at the prison he was in
- Are You a Service Provider? If Yes, please tell us about your service.
- I am a student working on getting licensed as an Alcohol and Drug Counselor
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I'm new to this community
My name is Deborah, my husband was brutally stabbed to death in the prison that he was in. it will be one year on the 31st of this month. I thought that I was doing well for the past few months, but this month i can't stop crying. i feel so sad and i miss him so very much. At first I wanted to know everything so i read the investigative report and the autopsy report and now I can "see' the entire attack happening in my head. it won't go away. I feel sad all the time and cry all the time… Continue
Posted on May 9, 2011 at 4:04pm — 2 Comments
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Latest Activity
"Sorry to see your stories here... There is nothing worse. I will be at 4 years in June. After a while at least for me, the acute pain just became dull pain. I have heard that grief is love turned inside out. No…"
"Thank you bluebird for always encapsulating the horror movie we live in in a way that is gentle but firm. I can only nod my head in agreement with each of the points you made because I am so exhausted by trying to explain this widowing to…"
"Martee, I am so sorry you are also in this hell. I really have no hopeful words to offer; for me, any meaningful life ended when my husband died. I didn't survive, my body just hasn't died yet. There is no joy in life anymore, for me.
That…"
"Re doing things we did together I was thinking more of making piecrust with my mom, or the right way to chop vegetables, or starting plants from cuttings, not anything like vacation travel. When my husband died several people, including…"
"Brenda, I think that people look too hard to find some thing very big. That something that makes you happy could just be a doughnut. When you are taking baby steps it's just a matter of getting from the chair to the couch.
That's what I…"
"Hello mommas
Nice to have your words and well wishes here. We all know this journey all too well. There are days u dread as well, and on those days we all have, we just need to be very gentle with ourselves. That's something I'm…"
"Re baby steps, one thing that has helped me is doing things that we did together, or learning to do things that she did. It might sound sad or even heartbreaking, to do those things alone, and if it feels that way it’s not the right…"
"Brett you said it perfectly and you actually helped me also God bless you and your little dog and everyone of us here it’s always nice to know that we still keep in touch after almost 5 years"
"Day by day. Minute by minute. Find something, anything that makes you happy and focus on it. For me it's my dog. When she is gone I will focus on something else. It could be anything.
If that doesn't work, do it for your mom. Carry on for…"
"For me it now has been three years ... three years and four months.
I survived first by distracting myself from it, thrust into work and no time to think, it would only come back at evenings and nights to haunt me ...
I guess what helped me was…"
"Bluebird, so sorry for you loss,your posts spoke my feelings exactly on grief and pain of living. Can you please let me know how you survived all these years.
Its been just over 2 weeks and each day is an eternity for me I hope I don’t…"
"Today I have been walking as a lifeless, joyless, husk for 2 weeks and 4 days. My beautiful, loving husband is gone...."
"it has been almost 6 years (my mom passed away on Feb 18, 2014) since my mom (56-year-old) passed way, it still feels like yesterday..I can't believe it..anyone here whos still here after all these years?"
"Brett, I am looking for the same light at the end of the tunnel. I feel the same way about my dog he is a Labrador and its so so difficult to see him limp or have a bad day, he takes meds, I just want him to be comfortable. I say to…"
"Brenda, I rely on my faith so much, but I realized a long time ago that there won't be a magic moment where an angel comes down and tells me that everything will be okay. I'm not criticizing God. I just realize that this is something that…"
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Thank you Deborah, I am doing okay just now - not so many days where I want to lock myself away from the world. I still feel the loss each day that I wake and realise that Chris wont be coming back to us but it is getting easier to bear. I still talk to him each day and hope for guidance - his is the first name I think of each morning and my last thought at night. I have so much that I wish I could have said and so much still to say. Even now 28 months later, I am still meeting people that don't know that he is no longer with us and those meetings are so very hard and uncomfortable. I hope that you are finding things easier too and you are in my prayers each day., God bless you and hold you in his hands and heart.