Id love to talk sometime add share stories. I am working on a paper for my masters degree and have to talk to different people and ask them a few questions. I am new at this a little confused so if you could help it would be appreciated.
I am so sorry for the loss of your fiance. I can not begin to imagine or understand the pain that you are going through on top of having to raise your baby alone. I recently lost my sister and have been so lucky to have my husband help me through this incredibly difficult time. I hope you have people in your life to lean on and I pray that one day you're able to find peace.
Thank you Kali. I hope you are having an ok day today. Going on with life seems to be the hardest thing to do. We wish life will stop going while we are grieving. And all events, bdays, anniversarys, holidays etc. will just skip until we are better. But unfortunately, that does not happen. Everything around us keeps going regardless of how we feel. Please take one day at a time. Dont feel rush into things. And if you have a good day, dont feel guilt or bad, that just means that God and your fiancee are with you!. I try to live life the way my husband will want me to live it. I have had many many dreams with him where he tells me exactly this!.
Hello Kali. Sorry for the loss of your fiance. And know that at this time there are no words that can make you feel better. But just know that all of us in here understand each other. I myself, know exactly what you are going through and what you might be feeling at this time in process of grief. Please know that it is a process that takes time. Dont feel rush to heal or feel ok right away. You will see that as time passes you will somehow begin making baby steps into being o.k., not good or better, but o.k. Since I believe our lives will never be the same.
About me, I became a widow at the age of 27 after my husband was murdered on April 28, 2011. In a minute my life completely changed and turned upside down. Never did I imagine loosing him at such a young age and in such cowardly way. My son was just 19 months old at the time. And like you said, although he did not know what was going on, he did become sick and looked around for Daddy. It has now been 1 year 3 months, since he has been gone. Til this day, I still at times feel its a bad dream and will soon see him or hear his voice. My son will be turning 3 yrs old next month and it will be his 2nd bday without his Dad. I talk to my son about his Dad a lot and keep his memory with him at all times. Mention his name a lot, sees pictures and tell him stories.
I can tell you and believe me when I say this. You have a precious gift with you, the symbol of love you and your fiance shared, which will be with you forever, and that is your Daughter!. I was told this many times soon after my husband's loss but my mind was just to overwhelmed with pain and I honestly did not made sense of things around me. Now, I can say that my son, is my Heroe!. Its because of him that I am still standing today!. He reminds me of my husband and know that my husband will live on him forever!. He has done a lot more than any doctor or therapist did for me while attending theraphy for over 1 year!.
There is many challenges ahead of us in raising our children. I can tell you many I have already faced myself. But know that there is "light for all of us ahead of this dark tunnel".
Take Care and when you feel alone, simply hug your daughter close to you and you will feel the love!
"I thought celebrating my mom birthday would make it easier. It was fun to celebrate but I still feel the loss. Downs are not as bad as they use to be but I still have them around anniversaries dates."