Crystal K
  • Female
  • Honolulu, HI
  • United States
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  • Frances Koonce
  • Avi
  • Joy

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About my Loss:
I lost the most important person to me 10 days after my 25th birthday- my mom. Still dealing with all the emotions that come with such a significant loss. Its hard, very hard. Life feels empty. I don't enjoy much anymore. Any joy I have is overcast with a dark cloud of sadness. I'm angry, and sad. I have lost others but nothing could prepare me for this.
Now I don't know what the word is to describe the amount of pain and abandonment I feel from losing my mom. Feel like I don't have anyone to rely on. Never was close to my dad. Sisters moved out 10 years ago so although I love them, I am not very close as I once was.

If it was possible I would exchange places with her in a heartbeat, not because of how painful it is- but so she could've lived longer and enjoyed her grandchildren (my sister's kids). She was such a selfless mother, grandmother, sister, caretaker- that she did not deserve to go out the way she did.

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At 6:36pm on June 28, 2018, Joy said…

Hi Crystal, happy birthday. My birthday is also tomorrow and I also dream of my mom occasionally. I dreamed of her last night. She's been gone a little over a year and it's not gotten any better for me. I'm functioning, but I think of her all day every day.

At 9:33pm on October 9, 2017, Bryan Kelly Reeves said…

just your story, why your are here, what you battle (anger, fear, etc)

At 5:16pm on October 9, 2017, Bryan Kelly Reeves said…

Id love yo exchange stories sometime. Also Im working on a project for my masters degree and need to have contact with 5 people and ask them a few questions.

At 7:23pm on September 20, 2017, Joy said…

Crystal, like you, I talk to my mom daily. Whether she can hear me is unknown. I do believe God hears me, so I ask him to tell my mom how much I love her, miss her and wish I could see her to give her a hug. I'd give up everything I own to see her again


Latest Activity

Benny Avina posted a discussion

Moving Through the Seven Stages of Grief

When a heart breaks, you’re left gasping for air. After a while you seem fine, yet fall apart unexpectedly at random moments, sanity seemingly forsaken. There’s a saying that when a heart breaks, it cracks to allow golden love to shine through onto others. Do you see the value in going through this?It may not feel like it now, but grief is an honor. It is an honor to feel that much, to have loved that much. It teaches you compassion, gratitude, resilience, and the importance of grabbing life by…See More
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Roslyn replied to Roslyn's discussion learning to cope with my loss
"Hi Enza This is a very early response to your email I know, but my sister is arriving today for 2 or 3 days.  I have to admit to being nervous.  First time having someone stay since I lost Pete. Plus, she will be sleeping in the bed he…"
V. R. replied to Roslyn's discussion learning to cope with my loss
"Hi Ros, I hope you're not getting too much rain. We are yet again going through a period of persistent rain since yesterday morning and apparently will continue for the next few days. I thought England was bad! The tomato crop went OK, would…"
dream moon JO B replied to Carol Sue Tracy's discussion Too many deaths
"yep i get it loss mom to dem/copd cud not get in to sea her coz of cov 19 ruless in 2021 loss my uncle jon in 2021 bothh of thm 6th mnths aprt  so mushloss in lastt 30 yrs or more shud say loss of 47 yrs omy life coz i am 47 "
Carol Sue Tracy commented on Julie Dolsey-Weiss's group Multiple Losses Group
"Is this group active?"
Carol Sue Tracy joined Julie Dolsey-Weiss's group

Multiple Losses Group

I am creating this site for the many of us who have suffered several losses. I lost my mom, dad, grandma(2nd mom), grandpa, my beloved dog and divorce.Many of us have lost more than one person or event.Come share!See More

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