I have lost my beautiful sister Tonia on 21/05/2011. She suffered a heart attack at 36 yrs.. She was my sister my best ever mate my real soul mate... we has such a special and close bond - she was…Continue
Started this discussion. Last reply by Jarvis Jun 25, 2011.
I hate xmas now since I lost my 34 year old son following what a dr told us was a routine aortic valve replacement. He was taken from us in Jan., 2010. This is our second xmas without him. I have to say this has been more painful than last xmas. He loved xmas and we had so much fun together. I don't decorate or do anything for the holidays. Today I spent most of it crying and actually lying on the floor screaming. Just thinking about never seeing him or hearing his beautiful voice is horrific agony and pain. I don't know what to do anymore. I miss Marty so much the pain is unbearable.
I'm glad that my words were able to give you a little comfort. My heart just goes out to you. I know that people say things and they mean well, and I think it is because they know how much you are hurting and they don't want to see you that way. But right now your pain is very raw and it's okay not to be your best or your strongest. That doesn't mean that you are a weak person, it just means that you are dealing with a very traumatic loss that has hurt you to your soul.
I keep thinking about all of the times when I could have picked up the phone and called my brother. He called me often to see how I was doing, but I was working two jobs and going to school full time and I kept telling myself that I would get around to it "soon". I can't tell you how much that tore me up that I didn't call him. But I know that my brother knows how much I love him, just like Tonia knows how much you love her. Sisters have a bond that nobody can break - even in death - and you will always have that with her.
Yesterday I decided that whenever I start thinking about what Kevin went through when he died, or beating myself up because I didn't contact him more often, that I am going to think of something that was a good memory of him or of us together - or the times that I did show him how much I loved him. In the beginning I didn't think it would be much, but I am actually remembering that I did do and say a lot of things that let him know that I cared. It is kind of hard because my mind keep wanting to go back to those other things, but I think with a little time, I will be able to remember the good times we had together and stop focusing so much on how he died - at least I hope so. I don't know if this will help you, but if you give it a try, please let me know if it helps at all. God Bless.
I am very sorry to hear about the loss of your sister. It sounds like you had a very close relationship with her. She was so young...too young and I wish I could say something to ease your pain. Just know you are not alone and I will keep you, your sister and all of your family in my prayers. I am here for you if you need someone to talk to.
Nadia, welcome to the group. I am so very sorry for your loss. Your story brought tears to my eyes because I know the pain of losing a sister. Your loss is so fresh I suggest finding a local support group in your area which can be very helpful and read all about grief and the stages of grief so you know or are prepared for the times ahead of you. Again, Welcome, With Love, Deborah
No comments yet!
Welcome to Online Grief Support - A Social Community
"Strike those vacations below, they'll never be another one. Went on a memorial cruise with my daughter and family four months after she passed because she was so looking forward to it. It hurt enough to know they'll be no more."
"Yes Elynn, the loneliness. That's painful. They're not here and always was. Our best friend, lover, and most precious thing we had. We were lucky enough to spend the last 8 1/2 years together, joined at the…"
"Every day for me is the same day she passed. Not a joyful or even an ok moment. I spend a little time with the children and grands and do my best to hide my emotions, but they all know how I am inside, even the youngest grand at age 4…"
"Avi, I don't know if we can rethink our emotions that way. Our emotions are what they are, although reason can help us form our emotions and hopefully change them for the better. I don't know if my mom can hear me or not. I certainly…"
"How are you all doing?
I had bad last 2 days. Felt lot of guilt and cried. There were some moments which made me remember my mother.
Also I hear comforting words by a lady that people who have gone from this world can still feel your…"
"I wonder how i am managing. Not well and to be onest today I wanted to just set a date with death. I am approaching seven years of being without him and though I function towards the outside world better and my crying has lessened but at the…"
If you have lost a loved one to alcohol, substance abuse or suicide please share your story or feelings here. Share the love and beauty of the one you lost. Losing someone any of these ways is not natural and can be hard to understand and ask why? I lost my Mother to an overdose 9 years ago. She also suffered from major depression. Her doctor got her hooked on pain medication and she was addicted most of my life. These doctors who were suppose to help her ended up killing her in the end. I also…See More
"I am very sorry to hear about your Mom passing. I lost my Mother to an overdose 9 years ago and just my identical twin sister last month to an overdose. My mother and I were not as close as I would have liked. The disease kept her depressed and…"