Comment

Comment by Mark on June 20, 2013 at 9:41pm

Someone posted:

 

NEED HELP ON HEALING AND COPING
My father passed away on May 2, 2013. He was 83. He was perfectly healthy and fit for his age. He had age related very mild diabetes and some blood pressure. Two years back he had stents put in (angioplasty) activities slowly. All his tests blood lungs etc. were fine. The next morning my mother telephoned to inform us that he ............had passed away. He woke up at 4.45 a.m. and told my mother to call the ambulance, he is finding it hard to breathe, and once he is given oxygen he will be fine.  My mother gave him some juice since his mouth seemed dry and he had three drops of juice slowly and closed his eyes. My mother thought he is taking rest. One of our neighbors is a doctor and came by within 5 minutes to see my father. My mother had left the door open for the doctor can come in.  She examined my father and said he has passed. The ambulance came within 7 minutes and they also confirmed that he has passed away. They said it was cardiac arrest.
I came back as soon as I got the news. I am devastated. I feel very guilty. When my father was diagnosed with pneumonia the doctor said he may have got the infection from me. I feel very guilty about this whole thing. I feel that if I had insisted on not going on the trip he may not have got the pneumonia and he may be fine and alive today. I feel that I should not have moved in with them and maybe my frustration also added to all this.  I have been a failure all life. I had an ok job and was married (1987) but the marriage lasted only 4 years. It was a very difficult marriage and I was not happy at all.  My attempts at remarriage and finding a partner again have been failures. Now I am jobless. So I have never given my parents happiness by being happily married giving them grandchildren etc. I have always had some problem or the other and have only managed to stay afloat with all my problems. My father was always a great support to me and made me feel optimistic.
My father has always been a very loving and responsible husband, son, sibling, parent, grandparent, employee, friend who lived life very well within his means, was very charitable and helpful always. H prayed every day for everybody. He did not have any enemies and did not speak ill of anyone. He loved everyone. I believe he was so good he must be in heaven now.  Why did he have to pass on so soon when he was so healthy and enjoyed life? I feel that my coming back home and my problems added to all this. Every day I pray that is happy and blissful wherever he I and one day I will meet him and say how sorry I am I could not give him happiness in every way. My family believes in rebirth also but after this I am confused and don’t believe in anything. Why does somebody so good have to leave so suddenly.
Please tell me how to find solace and how to see that my father is happy, blissful and not suffering.

....I am responding.  I am so sorry for your loss. I hope you can find some help from people who are specialists in grief.

I went through a very similar situation about a year ago, losing one parent (and as an aside, this was after losing the other parent a short time prior).

 

I have spent many hours re-thinking lots of things. I have "beaten" myself up over the passing. I wish I could have both parents back, and particularly - since it was so unexpected - wish I could have the one back that passed suddenly.

 

I don't know what else to say to you.  I believe you tried your best, and life sometimes doesn't give us all the things we want. I know some people don't get this - they would say that we get what we go after.

I'm confident you tried to help your parents.

 

I will pray for you.

 

 

Comment by dream moon JO B on June 15, 2013 at 3:17pm

so sory abot yore loss shirly i no how u feal i wish i cud evry 1 a hug we hav lost if i cud bring thm all bac i wud i no i cant 

Comment by Shirley Holt on June 12, 2013 at 7:36am

My sister Barbara was murdered three months ago today. So many bittersweet memories. I just wish I could give her a hug and tell her how much I miss having her in my life.

Comment by Deborah Christine Creekmore on June 11, 2013 at 7:38pm

Marilyn, I am so sorry for your loss and I know exactly how you feel as I feel the same way. Frasier is about the only show I can watch, because Dustin didn't care for it. I use to watch Reba with him every evening when he came home from work while he ate. I can't bring myself to watch it. It has been almost 2 months now and I still have yet to go in his room or his bathroom. I feel lost without him. He lived with us his whole life and was such a wonderful child and wonderful young man and he touched so many lives. I miss him more and more with each passing day. I know how hard this is for you and again I am so sorry. I guess we are to take it one day at a time. My son Josh told me the other day "Mom all we can do is breathe, so just breathe" and that is about all I can manage at this point....

Comment by Patricia Hoffman on June 9, 2013 at 5:16pm

I am so sorry for your loss Deborah, The pain of losing a child of any age is unimaginable, I lost my 3 year old granddaughter, 2 months ago, and my mom a week 1/2 ago, and I dont know how I get out bed everyday, I think theymust be giving me the strength, along with my dad who I lost 26 years ago.......I am told each day gets better, so far I am not feeling that, but it must be true, because look at all of us  doing it and living as out loved ones would want......HUGS, Patricia

Comment by Deborah Christine Creekmore on June 9, 2013 at 5:04pm

I just lost my precious baby boy(24 yrs old) on April 27th 2013....He was killed in a flash fire at an Exxon Mobil plant....He was mine and my husbands only child together and was my husbands only biological son. Between us we have 7 children and he was the baby. He was such a loving and authentic young man and touched so many lives. My husband and I are not doing well at all. My middle son Josh is taking it very hard as well. He and Dustin (our baby) were more than brothers they were best friends and he is the one that found him....I just don't understand any of this....He was such a comfort to our family and such a caring and loving young man. He had such a beautiful caring smile and he loved everyone and never had anything bad to say about anyone...I don't know if I will ever find any  peace and comfort as I feel as though my insides have been ripped out....thanks for listening

Comment by dream moon JO B on June 9, 2013 at 3:37pm

if i cud bac in tim i wud to spend more tim of pepel i had lost i now relize life is to short 

i ask why dose god tak the best 1s good pepel it nevr hurt any 1 

Comment by anne on June 7, 2013 at 1:32pm

Dear Marilyn, I know that feeling. when I read your words I had a flashback to the day I too went through what you did. Your words of the Lord have comforted me today. thanks

Comment by Dennis C. on June 7, 2013 at 6:42am

Marilyn

You are absolutely correct. This is a terrible pain. An agony really. No words can truly express the anguish that we can feel in our hearts.

the Bible says this:

Romans 8:22 — For we know that all creation keeps on groaning together and being in pain together until now.

So everyone at one time or another deals with these things. I do believe this. DEATH is NOT part of God's plan. God has not brought death to mankind. Man has done that. Gods gift to us will be LIFE. I look forward to that.

Comment by Dennis C. on June 7, 2013 at 6:27am

I lost a dear friend on Wednesday to a terrible accident. He fell off a roof and suffered a fatal brain injury. He was only 12 feet high. But he landed head first (the the back of his head) on a concrete driveway.

How true the Bible is when it says:

James 4:14 — whereas YOU do not know what YOUR life will be tomorrow. For YOU are a mist appearing for a little while and then disappearing.

It was so difficult watching the family (whom I have known for years) come to the hospital one by one to hear that Lyle had died. I am glad I was there for them. 

• ‹ Previous
• 1
• …
• 50
• 51
• 52
• 53
• 54
• …
• 127
• Next ›
• Page