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Comment by Shellie on January 25, 2017 at 12:15pm

I'm going to go and see if i can find that book that been recommended to me..I'm trying so hard to be strong for my family..my parent were married 46 yrs so dad blaming himsrlf..he says if he justen the grey hound down she be here..and he also regretting what he said to me that night he said to me is all i care aboutcis that piece of metal not my mom..he said many times sorry and its he fault ...my whole family a mess .i dont want lose my whole family over the accident..i just want us to learn from it and be stronger for each other..we cant take back what we said or bring mom back to live..
I knew one day i would loss my mom from a illness or something but not the way i did..i thought i would be able tell her i love her
I would have many more years sorry for venting

Comment by Lisa Green on January 25, 2017 at 11:33am

Oh Shellie, my heart goes out to you. I lost my Mom Feb. 24, 2016 so I am coming up on one year. I can't imagine the hurt of losing a Mom could be any worse than what I've experienced but I guess there are circumstances where it certainly could. My Mom and I were not arguing at all and I still felt guilty for a long time. I was her Medical Power of Attorney and had to make a lot of decisions when she got really sick in the hospital. I will always second guess those decisions but ultimately I now realize that her death was not my fault and i could not have prevented it. No more than you could have prevented your mom's death. There is no way you could have known what was going to happen. When God call us home, he calls us home. Try to focus on all of the wonderful memories you have with your Mom. Coming to this site was a great help for me. I don't feel like I'm the only person going through grief. I have learned from many of the comments here and they help me so much. I hope they will help you also. The book that David mentioned below was recommended to me by a grief counselor that I saw (only once). Recognizing the stages of grief has been helpful to me also. It helps to put things into perspective. May God bless you and give you peace and comfort and understanding. Be easy on yourself, especially now. 

Comment by Shellie on January 25, 2017 at 10:40am

On 20 of dec my dad had drop me and my hubby and daughter at the airport. We were going to go and see my inlaw he hadn't had a christmas with them for 5 yrs so we were excitied about seeing them..
My dad asked if he could use my and my hubby car while we were gone..i said they could which to me was to use in the local area

My dad had a chance for a job interview for trucking which the interview was out of utah we lived in idaho. My dad decided to take my car . he didnt think i mind but when my hubby and i found out our car was in utah we were upset
On the chrstmas eve i got the worse call from my brother that i could ever get. He told me that mom was killed in a car wreck
Dad got the job and he told mom to take the car home. She got 17 miles from home and hit black ice. She was heading west bound on a major freeway and she ended up going through medrain and into east bound lane. She hit a semi head on. She died on inpact
My mom was a good driver and she doesnt speed or so i didnt want to believe she was gone. How when i just talk the night before..to me i guess always thought accident that bad was people doing stupid stuff like drinking and driving speeding but mom never did those stuff.was it something that was said the night before when we were fighting that made it happen
I wanted my car back but it wasnt worth losing my mom..I've learned a hard lession dont drive if your fighting make sure you made up before driving and dont take your love one for granted..i feel so guilty and sad. The last thing my mom said was to my hubby he had it on speaker sorry sir car is coming home now..i want her to know I'm not mad about the car I'm upset she gone sorry for venting

Comment by Theresa on January 25, 2017 at 5:21am

Shellie, I agree, my dad was ill and when he passed I knew that would be what would happen, my mom, died suddenly and unexpectedly from cardiac arrest, that is what I am struggling with.  

She was not sick, I spoke to her thirty minutes before she died and she sounded like herself.

Everyday is painful for me.

Comment by Shellie on January 24, 2017 at 7:53pm

I have do some reasearch about grieving.i have found in my research that a sudden death like my mom in a car wreck can hurt more then someone that has a illness and known there going to die. Dont take me wrong all death hurt...I'm in a face why and what if. Which is normal ..i have heath 5 stages of grieving

Comment by David B on January 24, 2017 at 4:59pm

I have started reading a book by Elisabeth Kublet-Ross M.D. & David Kessler that is called "ON GRIEF & GRIEVING
Finding the meaning of Grief Through the Five Stages of Loss". Elizabeth devoted her life to the study of death and the dying and to nurture those she came in contact with. It may not be what you want right now but I have found for myself it is time to work through the grief I have tried to ignore or wallow in. It is by no means a substitute for professional help, but I feel it has support value and we all will visit the stages of grief in our own time and and as many times as needed to understand and become at peace with our losses. My heart goes out to everyone struggling with the loss of a mother.

Comment by Shellie on January 24, 2017 at 4:35pm

Thank you everyone for the support

Comment by David B on January 24, 2017 at 4:32pm

Very sorry for your loss Shellie. I too lost my
dear mother in the month of Dec. It still haunts me every Dec and Christmas and life have never been the same. My heart goes out to you and I hope this group and the universe will guide you to a place of peace. I know it takes time and work and for me a lot of tears. Be kind to yourself and talk to others that understand the pain. Maybe not exactly what your experiencing but have the common thread of the loss of the most important person in their life. We have all experienced that loss of our dear mothers. Bless you Shellie.

Comment by Theresa on January 24, 2017 at 4:06pm

So sorry Shellie

Comment by Shellie on January 24, 2017 at 3:19pm

Hi i lost my mom on christmas eve from a car wreck and it just tearing me up today is one month

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