Brett Bowman
  • Male
  • Apex, NC
  • United States
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Are We Alone?
33 Replies

Ever since the loss of my mom (12/242015) I have felt very much alone. It didn't start out that way. After mom died, as sad as I was, I had friends and family calling me each day to see if I was…Continue

Started this discussion. Last reply by Robin H Oct 28, 2018.

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Brett Bowman's Page

Latest Activity

Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Avi, I felt something very similar. After a year the pain and shock of mom's death had eased somewhat, but the guilt increased. I learned that grief is a process that has many different facets. I am really amazed by the folks who seem to…"
May 14
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Betsy, this is a tough post to answer or respond to, because I know that you have already put yourself on trial and found yourself guilty. You are not going to be consoled now. You want people to tell you that it wasn't your fault, but you will…"
May 13
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Mother's Day is my mom's birthday. There is good and bad about being further removed from my mom's death. I remember when she died, in the days and weeks that followed I would think to myself, "In 20 years maybe I will have…"
May 7
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"The triggers are one of the hardest thing. Just hearing a song, driving down a familiar street, a smell, a television show, can all bring back a painful memory. Even if they invoke a nice memory, it still hurts because of lost time, not being able…"
Apr 26
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Sue, if we can ever answer any questions that you may have about what you are experiencing, please let us know. Everyone's story is different, but the feeling of loss that we all have is familiar. This is a group of people who understand."
Apr 26
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Avi, it's amazing how the Lord took care of both you and your dad. As happy as I am for you, I think I may be even more happy for your dad. This gives him a reason to get up in the morning, and gives him someone to focus that lost love on. You…"
Apr 26
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Sue, I am so sorry. I know. Believe me, we know. And I wish that I could say something more. Something horrible happened to me today. The worst possible thing that could have happened, beyond losing my dog. I'm not sick or anything, but my…"
Apr 23
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi, Avi. Happy Easter to all. It's status quo for me."
Apr 21
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Time flies too quickly. My mom's first birthday away from this earth was very hard. It was a very odd day because it didn't even hit me until that night that it was my mom's birthday. I knew. I knew without even realizing that I knew.…"
Apr 3
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Yes, it is absolutely obvious that you are a loving son. And we all have our own stories. I know why I feel guilty but I do not pretend to know why anyone else here feels guilty, unless they tell us of course. And I want to be honest. I want to look…"
Mar 14
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Theresa, I'm trying as well, but this is something that my mom and I had talked about. Mom wanted me to go on with a smile on my face. If it had been me who had died, I know that it would have haunted my mom the same as her death is haunting…"
Mar 2
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I sure know that feeling. I was thinking about this today. I have faith that my mom is in heaven. And, yes I would rather be in heaven with my mom than be here. But here's the really sad things. Even if there is nothing after we die, I would…"
Mar 1
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Avi, I have been thinking about your post all day.  And I do not want you to feel like you are alone at all. There's not a day that goes by, not an hour when I don't think about my mom. And I think for people like me and Theresa, days…"
Feb 28
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"That's all it takes, Avi. Just one thing that makes you want to get up in the morning. That's a good start."
Feb 27
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"You are right. I became conditioned with my mom. Every health crisis that my mom would have was traumatic for me. And then there would be that ray of light. I would have mom safe at home once again. I developed some false hope. But as time passed…"
Feb 17
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Theresa, it's hard for me to be positive about anything. I always feel like something bad is right around the corner. That's because every time I thought mom was safe and had cleared another hurdle, something else would go wrong. It's…"
Feb 16

Profile Information

About Me:
I am an average guy who misses his mother greatly.
About my Loss:
I loss my mom on 12/24/2015. I was her caretaker.

Brett Bowman's Blog

Anonymous

I have only been on this site for a few days. And I realize that I am an anonymous person to all of you. You are to me as well. Over time I hope to get to know many of you better, to find out your stories, who you lost, and why you loved them so much.

I don't want to be just a random name, or that kid who misses his mama. I want you to know who I am. The first and most important thing to know is that no one calls me Brett. My nickname is "Oatmeal." I have been called Oatmeal…

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Posted on August 1, 2017 at 12:18pm — 5 Comments

How Far is Heaven?

I'm a mamas boy. There was a time when I was embarrassed to say that. Not anymore. I would scream it from the mountain tops, especially if I thought that my mom could hear me. I was her caretaker. I couldn't stand the idea of my mom spending her last days (years) in assisted living. I wanted her to die in her own home, and I wanted to give something back to the woman who not only gave me life, but also loved me unconditionally until her last day on earth. She died on Christmas Eve, 2015. And…

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Posted on July 27, 2017 at 10:30am — 12 Comments

Comment Wall (3 comments)

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At 1:23pm on March 7, 2018, DeeDee said…

Thanks so much for your kind email. I was just reading your Blog. I am so very sorry for the loss of your beloved mom. She sure sounds like she was one very strong and loving woman. God bless her. Cool nickname "Oatmeal" that's certainly unique! :-) I know in time things will get a little easier, but right now, they are so raw. Thanks again for taking the time to share and write Oatmeal. I truly appreciate it. ~Dee-Dee 

At 8:26am on November 23, 2017, BLUEBELL said…

The holidays are coming up and the anniversary of your sweet Mother's death. How are you?

Bluebell

At 10:46pm on October 10, 2017, M Adams said…
So sorry about Little Boo -- this kind of loss on loss is really hard. Hope the other little dog is doing okay and that you can give each other some comfort.
 
 
 

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Nancy is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
yesterday
dream moon JO B replied to Elynn m's discussion Lonely
"thnx.............."
yesterday
Jazi replied to Elynn m's discussion Lonely
"You are a good person. I'm sorry you are gong through this."
yesterday
dream moon JO B replied to Elynn m's discussion Lonely
"thnx  i no 1 day thy will get loss we got but i will not treet thm way did me "
yesterday
Jazi replied to Elynn m's discussion Lonely
"Thank you. I am sorry people have abandoned you. "
yesterday
dream moon JO B replied to Elynn m's discussion Lonely
"so sorry on yore loss i no u soon lern abot frinds familyy wen it cums to a loss  u soon lern abot real frindss u do evn famllyy 1s it dont trun bac on u wen u need themm "
yesterday
Jazi replied to Elynn m's discussion Lonely
"You said everything I am feeling right now. I am doing and thinking the same. I know it doesn't help but I am so sorry. "
yesterday
Jazi replied to Elynn m's discussion Lonely
"I am new  here and don't really know how to navigate so forgive if I make a mistake. I am drowning in pain and have been ignored by friends. I have only two left and both have many things of their own. I sit at night and hurt until the…"
yesterday
Profile IconKayla and Jazi joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Monday
Billy Jo Colt commented on Kelli Auerbach's blog post New York Times essay I wrote about orphanhood
"Thank you Kelly for a genuine and bright yet deep insight into how berievement has affected you. Children are resourcefull and it isn't till in later life that the death of a loved one creates a new reality. I've written a song about the…"
May 17
Kelli Auerbach posted a blog post

New York Times essay I wrote about orphanhood

Hi everyone, I am new to the group, but not to loss. Thanks for adding me.I wanted to share an essay I wrote, "Welcome to the Freak Show: Becoming an Orphan in My 20s", that is in the New York Times today. Even though all of our experiences with grief are unique, I hope it resonates in some way.Best, KelliSee More
May 17
Profile IconKelli Auerbach, Fedor Malkin and Jan McCracken joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
May 17
Coartney Hale updated their profile
May 15
Coartney Hale posted photos
May 15
Elynn m commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Everyone sounds a little down today.   And that's OK.   I do the same thing.   I am learning how to move on with life.  I know that there will never be another Joe.  He was my life, my love.  I miss…"
May 15
Joe Kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Over the last couple of days, I've had some real negative thoughts, scary to say the least.  I know I'll never see her here with me again, which I know but can't accept, but today I questioned is she here with me in spirit? …"
May 15
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Marita, not that I am glad to  hear you suffer from anxiety and fear but thank you for at least sharing that you too are overwhelmed with living.  At times I want to scream that the way I feel is not some cry for sympathy but more I am…"
May 15
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Bluebird, You were the original poster who made it real for me that telling the truth about our pain was ok.  That it was how this grief was going to be no mater how I might be told otherwise.  And to know that your truth is that pretty…"
May 15
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Linda, yes, I too have the recurring thoughts my brain sends me that my husband is dead.  It's not possible for me to accept it either.  I know it as fact just as I know the sun shines, but when it appears in my brain I simply cannot…"
May 15
Joe Kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"As much as we all suffer, some may have an additional burden of having to go out into the real world and deal with people in business to survive.  The impact of that makes it all that much more unbearable.  While I'm not in that…"
May 15

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