silvia maria
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  • porto alegre
  • Brazil
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Everything small going wrong trigger a setback

Lately I have been way more seletive about interactions. Because they trigger easily to a place lost in space and time. Its like Rolling down this big Mountain over and over just to feel Al right,…Continue

Started Apr 17, 2017

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silvia maria posted a blog post

Health in context of grief

Safe to assume the deffenses go down with the spirits. But in all fairness I´ve been sick for a while since I had the back surgeries, and it´s sometimes hard to separe effects from feeling ups and downs to the food and habits healthy and unhealthy. Added to that the idea that I will be ok and doctors don´t seem to  do much more for me these days. Neverhteless, some times I go to fix one thing and the medication side effects harm in some ways or the pain meds have caused me to faint and break 3…See More
Sep 17, 2017
silvia maria commented on silvia maria's blog post Does religion help?
"I hear you. I am much less inclined to organized religion per say tcompared to the solid belief in God. Though I think some religion may be a good tool to approximate to God, some do quite the opposite in their actions and attitudes. But one thing…"
Sep 15, 2017
Dennis C. commented on silvia maria's blog post Does religion help?
"I was just wondering. Is it possible to to separate religion from God? It's my opinion that Most Religion does NOT teach the Bible. They teach their own viewpoint or dogma. I think that when we search for the truth in the Bible we learn that…"
Sep 15, 2017

Profile Information

About Me:
I am a professional who lived abroad and used to a fast pace environment. Currently making some carrer changes to suit my own special needs. Rebuilding my life around this and undertaking suitable treatments. Up until very recently I had been coming closer to my mother and became her primary caregiver. Which was suddenly interrupted by an hemorrhagic avc.
About my Loss:
I am in the process of grieving my mother´s loss. Although she is still alive family members have made a lot of changes making it a lot more inhospitable to visit. She is in a clinic now which I had to report to police for negligence and since other family members chose to keep her there I don´t feel remotely near comfortable to visit. I have done all in my power to change clinics. But as is i have to cope with earlier loss of her without the actual loss of her life yet. I was the primary caregiver. And I am grieving for loosing a lot more than her actual life.

Silvia maria's Blog

Health in context of grief

Safe to assume the deffenses go down with the spirits. But in all fairness I´ve been sick for a while since I had the back surgeries, and it´s sometimes hard to separe effects from feeling ups and downs to the food and habits healthy and unhealthy. Added to that the idea that I will be ok and doctors don´t seem to  do much more for me these days. Neverhteless, some times I go to fix one thing and the medication side effects harm in some ways or the pain meds have caused me to faint and break…

Continue

Posted on September 17, 2017 at 8:00am

How to avoid old patterns of being frozen in time in the NON ACTION

As i am moving on to making my way back to work these days, seems I have to avoid the MENTAL state whereas the mind goes into some FROZEN state whereas I am unabe to move on in a healthy manner. See once we decided to leave that state of mind whereas the self pitty pot is full and the gun of frustration pointed at self, justified hurting or not that keeps me back to a state of NON ACTION or POOR REACTION, where self blame mixes with the stan still place....well, times changed. I realize I…

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Posted on September 9, 2017 at 3:30am

Does religion help?

I consider myself spiritual and not much in favour of organized religion. But lately I thought that could perhaps help to bring some peace or have some positive impact, So for the last  weeks I have been going once a week to this evangelic church witch I quite enjoy the visits. In the beggining was some help to put more peace in my heart and feel better. And that had a positive impact however I needed that new boost the next week or things would feel heavier somehow. Some weekes later I…

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Posted on September 8, 2017 at 5:30pm — 2 Comments

How do we treat ourselves....?

Here is a reality check I was faced with very recently. I had to take vitamins after my doctors persistent advice and I got a few extra pounds. Nothing much but enough to bring bullying from a very unlikely source. A friend that recently separated, a guy who insisted to say every single time he saw me that I was FAT. Even though most my friends would say the complete opposite. That I look healthier. In fact was so many times I heard from the same friend (also my neighbour) that I came to the…

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Posted on July 16, 2017 at 8:30am

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Latest Activity

Briana Wroten joined Karen's group
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I miss my Mom!

If you have that hole in your heart that you get when you lose the woman that you shared a body with....
2 hours ago
Avi is now friends with Frances Koonce and Brett Bowman
7 hours ago
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Avi, I will message my phone # to you. In fact, anyone who wants to call me can. I am convinced that none of you are strung out crackheads, trolling the internet."
7 hours ago
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Thanks BlueBell and Brett.  Bluebell wishing that you get perfect soon.  Brett, do you have a skype Id where we can have a call?"
7 hours ago
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Avi, I am so happy for you. And you are obviously doing better with women than I am..."
yesterday
Chanel commented on Cathy Richardson's group Being the Other Woman/Other Man
"I'm sorry to hear that you're still going through a tough time, Rain. I feel like some days I'm okay and others I'm struggling. I'm here if you ever need someone to talk to."
yesterday
BLUEBELL commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Congratulations Avi! Bluebell"
yesterday
Susan Dee Leatham posted a blog post

While I was sleeping

It has been 4 years since my mom died.  I still think about it every day, and can't seem to look past it.  I know I need to go grocery shopping.  I know I need to entertain my 4 year old but before I do anything today I want to share what has helped me tremendously in making my mom's death easier to live with.The first thing that helps is remembering her and being stubborn about NOT letting her go.  I don't have to let my mom go.  She already went.  The thing I do have to do is admit how I feel…See More
yesterday
Susan Dee Leatham posted a status
"It has been 4 years since I lost my mom. I never got "over" it. It has remained the most traumatic terrible thing that has ever happened."
yesterday
Profile IconCJ, Roslyn E!lison, Brend and 1 more joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
yesterday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Your mom is all around you..."
yesterday
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Thanks a lot Theressa.  For 4 days it was a roller coaster ride as we were in hospital but now as I am at my home I again get sad feeling my mother's absence. My wife and daughter is at my wife's place as there is no lady at my place…"
yesterday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Congratulations Avi!!!!! You have many happy years ahead of you!!!"
yesterday
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi All Guys I was away for few days as I am blessed with a baby girl on 10 Aug 18. Both mother and baby doing fine.  I planned my baby only as my mother wanted to see her grand child but destiny had other plans. But I hope she has still blessed…"
Tuesday
Rain commented on Cathy Richardson's group Being the Other Woman/Other Man
"It's been almost two years for me. It doesn't hurt any less. Some days I push it away but then all of a sudden every bit of it hits like a ton of bricks. I did tell a few of my best friends and I mostly regret it. Now I feel it's just…"
Tuesday
Frances Koonce replied to dream moon JO B's discussion mad at god
"Awww- I’m sorry about that! It must make you feel really terrible that you can’t just take her home.  The same thing happened with my mom after her heart attack. She couldn’t just live by herself anymore. We had to empty her…"
Tuesday
Profile Iconmorgan and Natasha Camacho-Gomes joined Amy Reed's group
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Losing a spouse and dating again

I lost my spouse 16 months ago. Have gotten into a new relationship but he lets me grieve openly. I have a2 year old daughter. Also I am 26See More
Tuesday
dream moon JO B replied to dream moon JO B's discussion mad at god
"iv bean to day to sea her iv hadto liee to her wish i feal bad wen can i go homee wen drs says so wear isdr on holday  why am hear coz dr says so i anserd it for abot 40 mins i did evry tim i leabee i feal dranedd i do  th 5 mons latr she…"
Monday
Jeff Tice commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Thank you bluebird.  My kids have been a huge comfort for me.  Making me laugh even when I don't want to and giving me someone to occupy my time and energy with.  I am working my way through this slowly and they help…"
Monday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Jeff, So sorry for your loss."
Monday

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