Sandra Nichols
  • Broken Arrow, OK
  • United States
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Virginia G left a comment for Sandra Nichols
"Are you still a member?"
Jul 9, 2018
Sandra Nichols commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Nancy, we are so alike. I just want peace also. You WILL remember your mom and good memories. It will come to you. My mom went downhill for about 3 years and the last year was very very traumatic between nursing homes and homes that would not take…"
Jul 16, 2013
Sandra Nichols commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi Wendy, It has been 1 1/2 years since mom died and some days I can hardly get out of bed the sadness is so intense. We also were hopgin and thought mom would make it through the cancer therapy she was one week from coming home and up and walking…"
Jul 12, 2013
Sandra Nichols commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi Nancy, Yes, the dynamics in a family change so much with death. My sister and I fought about the most stupid things but, thankfully we have learned to work together and are closer now. Please dont fret about your siblings. Death has not…"
Jul 10, 2013
Sandra Nichols commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Maddy, give yourself permission to cry. It is perfectly ok. AFter 1 1/2 years from my mom's death now and I got so sad today I barely made it to work with tears streaming down my face I could hardly move. I am so very sad but the…"
Jul 9, 2013
Sandra Nichols commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Sheila B, we have had so much of the same feelings. My mom was very frustrated and scared and alone at the end. She would not share any of that with me. What really tore me up was she turned form her religious she had always always been very…"
Jul 8, 2013
Sandra Nichols commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I"m glad it helps some people here, to talk about work. People at work, can be understanding about this mourning situation. I told my manager I was in a very fragile state but, working would be good therapy for me if I could just be…"
Jul 3, 2013
Sandra Nichols commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi all. It has been about 1 1/2 years since my mom has died. Some days I can go on automatic. Other days I get so very depressed and sad that I can't move. It is definately up and down... That is normal for everyone i think. I jsut about…"
Jul 2, 2013
Sandra Nichols commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Yes, I can see moving away from some people because of this  unbearable loss we are all experiencing. I am changing and i'll bet many of you are feeling the same thing happening. I will never be as I was and so my priorities and…"
Jun 25, 2013
Sandra Nichols commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I trulyl believe that people are all in different places in their lives and just about everyone means well when they talk to us in the midst of our deep grieving. but still, i am staying around people that truly understand. i am just too…"
Jun 24, 2013
Sandra Nichols commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I forgot to add one other thing. I feel like all of you are "my People" and everyone else in the world is just on another level somewhere else. Just as i feel like the cancer patients and their family members that would come in…"
Jun 24, 2013
Sandra Nichols commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"It has been 1 1/2 years since my mom has died. Sometimes I feel so very very sad that I can't function. I think of her little bald head from the damn chemo and it makes me upset. I am tearing up just writing that. Then other times I can laugh…"
Jun 24, 2013
Sandra Nichols commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Well, actually I;m reading the comments and it seems like a lot of you are having a harder time with teh second christmas than the first one. I'm angry at myself for feeling like i dont want to go on. Im impatient at my sister for blocking out…"
Dec 25, 2012
Sandra Nichols commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"It's been about 1 year and one month since mom has died. I feel worse now than I did last Christmas. Actually i feel like the first year i was in denial and shock. Now I cry more than I did before. I wonder if anyone else if like this. I really…"
Dec 25, 2012
David H left a comment for Sandra Nichols
"hi sandra thanks for picking me as a friend   Dave"
Jul 24, 2012
David H and Sandra Nichols are now friends
Jul 24, 2012

Profile Information

About Me:
I need support form recent loss of my mom. My best friend. She lived with me for 8 years and then died from complications of cancer treatment. I feel lost and go between numbness to total grief that I can't stand.
About my Loss:
My mother passed one week before Thankssgiving this year. I am in shock, denial, and grief. I am not coping with my job well. I get angry at coworkers that ask me if I am having a good holiday. How can people ask that?
Are You a Service Provider? If Yes, please tell us about your service.
no

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Sandra Nichols's Blog

Crying

It is Monday morning and I am at work in my cubicle. Crying and can't stop. Finally, my sister has started crying after about 8 months from losing mom. It made me start crying because she is the one person left on this earth that I love unconditionally. It is all so sad. This life is so depressing. WHy in the world are we here? To go through grief that makes us so depressed that we can't function?  Life is just so sad and depressing, I can't think of anything good about it. I am not sucidal…

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Posted on July 23, 2012 at 9:30am

Will this emptiness and depression lift from my life?

This has been such a lonely weekend for me. My mom has been gone now 7 months. I"m so sad and the deep depression does not get any better. I try to stay busy but, that doesn't help for 24 hours a day. I"m crying right now and I still feel angry at the cancer institute for the chemotherapy on my mom. I think that doctors don't worry about elderlyl and just give them the treatments without thinking of how fragile they are. I honestly don't know at this point,  how this world can become a good…

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Posted on July 1, 2012 at 5:40pm — 7 Comments

8:30 am monday

I had a panic attack and couldn't sleep Sunday night. I should have taken something to sleep but, didn't know it would keep on. I"m so sad today that I can't cry. Sunday was hard. I laid in bed and slept.

As bad as this is, I still don't think I"m facing the reality of you being gone, mom. I so wish you could communicate with me. 

Love,

Sandra

 

Posted on June 25, 2012 at 8:37am

2:30 pm friday

Hi again mom,

I"m sitting here thinking about the weekend and torn between being glad I can be away from people and worried that I will have a panic attack while I stay in our house all alone.

I"m still praying that you are in a wonderful place, a place you deserve.

I"m still angry at the cancer doctors and think they should have made your treatments a lot less severe. Someday, I may forgive them, but right now I feel lots of anger.

I"m also angry at life in…

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Posted on June 22, 2012 at 2:23pm — 2 Comments

Comment Wall (9 comments)

You need to be a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community to add comments!

Join Online Grief Support - A Social Community

At 2:44pm on July 9, 2018, Virginia G said…

Are you still a member?

At 5:50pm on July 24, 2012, David H said…

hi sandra

thanks for picking me as a friend

 

Dave

At 5:01pm on June 20, 2012, Mark said…

Sandra,  first of all I want to say I'm so sorry for your loss.  Second i want to say thank you so much for what you suggested.  The part about taking time each day to celebrate my mom.  I'm going to start doing that.  I know she'd want me to move fwd with my life and never consider giving up.

At 2:28pm on April 19, 2012, Storyas Fawnfeather said…

Hi Sandra.  Thank you for inviting me as a friend.  I hope you are feeling ok today.  I don't even want to say good, because I doubt any of us feel good.  But, I hope you feel ok.  Do you have a pet?  I got a dog after my dad died.  Actually, i think my dad sent me the dog due to after death experiences i had (have you seen that part of this website yet?), but I'll tell you that story later.  I just got home and I'm too tired to tell it now.  But, I have a dog.  This morning I took my dog to the office with me.  On the way, I ran out of gas cuz I'm so out of it lately I forget little things like that.  Well, Elbert - my dog who is named after my dad; my dad's name was Estil Elbert - was in the car with me.  While I waited for AAA, he climbed up on me and just put his face in mine and we rubbed our foreheads together, and it made me feel a little less depressed and made me feel connected to something (I rarely feel connected any more).  It was like he can sense how bad I feel, and he was trying to get through.  It helped a little. 

At 4:19pm on January 11, 2012, Bob Naples said…

Yes,there is a place where the spirit goes immediately upon passing over.If you would like to know more details,please go to the website of Victor Zammitt.He has a free e-book which goes into tremendous detail of the afterlife experience,and I'll think this will really help to give you comfort!!Be prepared,because what you are about to read may be the TOTAL opposite of what you've been taught to believe!:)

Keep me posted!

At 12:34pm on January 11, 2012, Bob Naples said…

All three of my kids were with me when I had my nde.It was my oldest son,Chris,who called 911,and if I had been alone,I would have died.After spending several years in a haunted house,I have never had any doubts about the afterlife.However,I did have doubts about where we would spend eternity.Thanks to the nde,I have no fear death,and I'm looking forward to the homecoming party that awaits all of us at the end of this long journey!

At 3:14pm on January 10, 2012, Bob Naples said…

Sandra,

The evening before my near-death experience,I saw my mom materialize about 12-15ft. in front me.It was 7 years after she passed over to the next life.The whole visitation lasted about 45 minutes,and I can't recall what we talked about off the top of my head,but I do have it documented word for word.My mom was mom,dad,friend,etc.all in one,and I once told her that I didn't know what i was going to do when she passed.She said if there is any way that she could call me home with her,she would try.The last memory of my visitation was mom motioning with her hands,calling me towards her.The very next day,I had my nde,and as I was going into the light,I could hear my 8 r. old daughter screaming for me not to go!!This broke my heart,and I asked for more time,and the next thing ii remember is waking up in the e.r...

At 3:23pm on December 28, 2011, Lisa Gladieux said…
I was so there with my mom and held her hand as well! While it was sad losing my mom, I wouldn't have wanted it any other way. 
At 11:51pm on December 20, 2011, MIchael A Ballard said…

Hello Sandra,

Very sorry for your loss, and we all are here for you.

Through my experience, this is the best place for support and friends.

Loss is terrible and we all know how you feel.

Hope to chat on here with you soon!

Peace and prayers,

Michael
 

 
 
 

Groups

Latest Activity

G B is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
18 hours ago
Dennis C. replied to Amy's discussion How do I get unstuck?
"Amy, I am so sorry for your loss. The journey of caregiving is extremely difficult. The loss of our especially loved dear ones is unspeakable. There are so many different ideas about what happens to us when we die. Religion teaches many different…"
yesterday
Sue Toler commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I just feel like I am in a fog.  I have a little dog that is at least ten years old.  She adored my Mom & she has really grieved for her.  I know how you feel about your dog.  I worry about her.  She is all I have. …"
Thursday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Me too Brett, I sit here an look at my 12 year old Labrador and I know he is on borrowed time, and my heart breaks, losing him will be something that I am not looking forward to. As you said Brett, we have the live our lives until we are called…"
Thursday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Yes, I was looking at something that popped up on my Yahoo news feed. It was an article naming 106 celebrities who have passed away in 2019. So many names and faces that I remembered. Now they are gone, and they aren't coming back. Their time…"
Thursday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Brett so true she was my security blanket I feel like I have no one to lean on that understood me like her You know what keeps coming in my mind. How true it is and scary that everything has a beginning and an end."
Thursday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I hear it all the time you don’t know how lucky you were that your mother wasn’t sick and you didn’t have to take care of her I say to them lucky I was lucky that my mother died and I was not right by her side to tell her I love…"
Wednesday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"M, the problem is that our security blankets were ripped away. Like you, sometimes I am glad to be sad. I feel like I am closer to my mom when I am crying. At least, her memory is fresher with me when I am in that zone. I feel like the hard reality…"
Wednesday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Theresa, millions, billions of people have lost their moms. Sometimes someone will tell me that they have lost their mom, too, but they were able to deal with it, and they wonder why I haven't dealt with it as well. This may sound like an…"
Wednesday
M Adams commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Me too ...I was sitting marking a paper yesterday and suddenly realized that I can’t see or talk to my mother about this or anything else and the tears came.  But I’m glad to think of her, in a way I can be glad to be sad sometimes.…"
Tuesday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I sometimes will just be sitting down and I start to cry because I keep thinking I miss my mom so much my whole world is just not the same I think that I’ve become a different person it will be four years and I still cry I can’t put into…"
Tuesday
M Adams commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Definitely a colder world now.  I like the image of the security blanket — like, as we go forward, we will always keep it but eventually may be able to wash it, fold it nicely, and put it in some place of honour close at hand but without…"
Tuesday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"The world just became a colder place when my mom died. I just remember feeling like all was right with the world when my mom was in the next room. "
Tuesday
Sue Toler commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"It is such a traumatic event, especially when you have had a wonderful Mom.  It is so hard knowing she is gone.  Knowing this is permanent.  There is no one that can fill the void she left.  My brother was close to Mom, but he…"
Tuesday
Cherie is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Tuesday
Amy replied to Amy's discussion How do I get unstuck?
"I am not a believer and nor was he. We covered the bases just incase though. We were both raised Catholic. That is all besides the point though. "
Tuesday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"While I never forget that my mom is gone, for some reason it just hits me over the head sometimes. Just out of the blue I'll be like, "Mom is gone." It's horrible. It's ever present. And the thing is that it is always with…"
Monday
Sue Toler commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"My Mom also.  I could always talk to her about anything & knew she was someone I could totally trust.  I am constantly thinking of something I want to share with her & then I remember she is gone.  I loved spending time with…"
Monday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"There is no doubt that it is anxiety. In fact, I think we are experiencing fight or flight. Since birth my mom had been my security blanket."
Monday
Sue Toler commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"It is still numbing to think my Mom is gone & I can't talk to her or see her again.  I lost part of me when she passed.  Someone said the restless feelings I have are really anxiety.  Daily crying is part of my life. …"
Monday

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