Don't grieve alone; 14,000 members and growing
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what?, 2 weeks... I am so sorry :(
Feb. 14th 2017. I guess that makes it 2 weeks ago already
Bluebell, you didn't have to accept my friend request, that is fine... I had a bad day yesterday. Some days the abandonment from my sister and her daughter just get to me. It's been 2 years 4mo since my Mom passed away... some days are still very hard. Bluebell, how long has it been since your Mom passed?
Thank you Nancy. It is a rough day. We are going to have to decide what to do with Mom's house in the next 2 months because of the Reverse Mortgage she took out on it. It really hurts. I know my Mom's house is not her, but they sure seem to be tied together. The thought of selling it seems to be doubling my grief. Bottom line is that reality is slapping me in the face and it feels really bad.
Bluebell
"I am just hoping that one day it goes away and I will be able to
live again."
I know what you mean Theresa. My heart goes out to you. We....meaning all of us on this forum.... are here for eachother. None of us has to go through this alone.
Bluebell
Bluebell, in time you will, but right now you are grieving.
Everyone keeps saying to me take your time, sometimes I like I am taking my time, my problem is I keep going over and over things in my head, not they will change
I wake up anxious and when I get to work it distracts me, somewhat.
I am just hoping that one day it goes away and I will be able to
live again.
Theresa,
I saw my Mom every day and night. My own home became a very expensive kennel for my dog and 2 cats. I only went home twice a day to feed the cats and dog and walk the dog. I worked part time just a couple of days a week for a few hours. As her health further declined, I always made sure my sister was able to be with her. But the primary responsibility was mine. Now that she is gone, I am all off kilter. I can't seem to pack up and leave her home and move back to mine. It is just seems more than I can bear. I thought I would be happy to be able to carry on with my life and go back to the way the it was before I became her caregiver. But it is not. I can't let go yet of what was my routine for so long
Bluebell, my only sibling is my brother, he is 17 years older than me, his view on my mom passing was "it was moms time", he believes the lord took her for that reason.
But he is compassionate and caring, but he lives 5 hours away and rarely saw my mom.
I saw my mom if I was off from work during the week and every Sunday like clockwork.
I talked to her 15 times a day just to see where she was and if she was ok.
I used to panic if I called her cell and she didn't answer, my heart would sink in fear that something happened.
Wow did things go down differently.
I get so upset that I aggravate my anxiety which in turn aggravates my IBS, horrible.
I do feel better when I am around people and interacting.
One day at a time is what I keep saying and praying
I am sorry Theresa. Some people are not very caring and your m in law is one of them. I have so many feelings and thoughts marching around in my head, that I think it is going to take some time to figure it all out. Many of them seem to be about my relationship with my brothers and sister. I have no anger at them. I just want them to be closer to me. I want my brothers to acknowledge that it is okay for me to grief as intensely as I am. I want to be able to give myself permission that it is okay for me to grieve the way I am grieving and that the intensity of it is okay.
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