Pamela philipp
  • Female
  • Hobart, IN
  • United States
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Understanding grief
10 Replies

There has been things on this site I understand and some things I don't however with that being said here is my opinion on recent things I have read about grief I lost my mother and my husband within…Continue

Started this discussion. Last reply by JO B Jan 24.

At the end of my rope
2 Replies

I don't know if I can go on much longer the pain is so excruciating it's getting harder each day it's coming up on 15 months since my husband passed away from cancer and I am having trouble sleeping…Continue

Started this discussion. Last reply by bluebird Dec 6, 2016.

Why does everyone say that things will get easier?
6 Replies

I don't understand why people keep telling me that things are going to get easier when people ask me how I am like a friend of mine that I've been friends with for over 30 years she lost her husband…Continue

Started this discussion. Last reply by annjulie Dec 7, 2016.

Feeling more lost than ever
5 Replies

It's been just a little over a year since my mom and my husband passed I've had no contact with my family because obviously they think I'm fine it's funny how when you lose somebody you find out…Continue

Started this discussion. Last reply by ShingingLight1967 Nov 20, 2016.

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Pamela philipp's Page

Latest Activity

Maxey and Pamela philipp are now friends
Thursday
Pamela philipp replied to Maxey's discussion Total numbness in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Maxey I’m sorry for the pain you feel ,I understand how you feel it turned 2years in September since my mom and husband left they both left this world in September of 2015 eight days apart and I honestly have been is this fog ever since I feel…"
Nov 2
Simethea Reese replied to Pamela philipp's discussion Stupid cancer commercials in the group Losing Someone to Cancer
"Every time I see those commercials I get so upset."
Oct 10
JO B commented on Pamela philipp's blog post Empty
"yep no fealin bean 5 yrs sinse dad gon iv tld foget him r els i cnt i no i feal bad coz im not bean fair 2 ther fealins"
Sep 27
Susan Smith commented on Pamela philipp's blog post Empty
"HI Pamela, I'm really sorry you still feel the way you do. I'm exactly the same, I think I now have smiling depression. Our Mums death leaves a massive hole and a loss of identity as well. We had our Mums for so long and I truely believe…"
Sep 27
Alice Thompson commented on Pamela philipp's blog post Empty
"Good luck, Pamela :-) It is so hard to live among others when your inner life is so different from theirs. I think that after the first year I gave up expecting anyone to understand what is really going on for me. Sometimes I tell them anyway, but…"
Sep 25
Pamela philipp posted a blog post

Empty

It's been 2 years since I lost my mother and my husband and I am still lost and still very much alone in my grief I haven't been on this site in a while I've been trying to get by every day it's not working too well I'm struggling really really hard my family is still not around I guess they think I am OK that I'm doing fine little do theyknow that I'm not they are coming to my house this Saturday for a cook out because it's something my mother wanted me to do that's the only reason I agreed to…See More
Sep 25
Pamela philipp commented on MIchael Ortiz's blog post Why I cannot be allowed to grieve,
"Dear Michael Ortiz I am going through a lot of the same thing my mother and husband both passed in September 2015 eight days apart and since my family has been MIA missing in action nobody calls and if anybody asks how I'm doing I don't…"
Aug 28
Linda Engberg replied to Pamela philipp's discussion Still lost in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Anne, You said it perfectly."
Aug 15
Marie Salas replied to Pamela philipp's discussion Still lost in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Double grief must be difficult. Please accept my condolences on the death of your mother and husband. I lost my husband 10 yrs ago this November 12."
Aug 15
Marie Salas replied to Pamela philipp's discussion Still lost in the group Lost My Spouse...
"I felt the same as you do now. Two years is a short time since you lost your spouse. My beloved husband is now gone ten years and I am now beginning to enjoy like with only a few occasional tears. I know that he would want me to enjoy life. Please…"
Aug 15
Linda Engberg replied to Pamela philipp's discussion Still lost in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Pamela, I lost my Husband 4 yeas ago and am still lost and will be until I join him."
Aug 14
Susan K replied to Pamela philipp's discussion Still lost in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Pamela, I am sorry for your pain. I have the same emptiness. I lost my husband six months ago and it has only gotten harder. I realized after the shock of his death wore off of others, I am left alone to deal with the void. I am going through the…"
Aug 14
Pamela philipp added a discussion to the group Lost My Spouse...
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Still lost

My 25th wedding anniversary is tomorrow and I am more lost than ever I miss my husband so much the pain of losing him is harder everyday my heart is in a million pieces and next month it will be two years since he left I'm only still here because I promised him otherwise I would be gone because life without him is no life at all and I will be forever broken without him and I will never understand why and anyone who says that time will heal you is a liar because the more time goes by the more…See More
Aug 14
Pamela philipp commented on Pamela philipp's blog post Lost
"Thankyou for what you said billy jo colt and Jackie Cooke I appreciate the support and it does help when you know someone is listening and understanding thankyou I am at a point where I am just feeling extremely lost and I would never do nothing…"
Jul 3
Jackie cooke commented on Pamela philipp's blog post Lost
"Hi Pamela, this is normal. Over 100 people at shirls funeral, no one been near, no phone calls. I think people can't handle our grief, they think it's catching, maybe we remind them this could be them one day, I don't know but I do…"
Jul 3

Profile Information

About Me:
Married 23years mother of two grandmother of seven
About my Loss:
My mom passed on sept 6th 2015 and then my husband passed sept 14th 2015 eight days after my mom how do you go on from there and also my wedding anniversary is August 15th it will be 24 years and no I will never stop saying I'm married because I am I guess the worst thing is no one in my family seems to care no one calls or has talked to me since the memorial for my husband how can I keep going on and the only reason I'm still here is because I promised my husband I wouldn't follow him into the dark but I really don't know how to live anymore without him and I still am not dealing with my mothers passing either so now what do I do and it makes me doubt there is a god or heaven how could a god that loves you hurt you like that

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Pamela philipp's Blog

Empty

It's been 2 years since I lost my mother and my husband and I am still lost and still very much alone in my grief I haven't been on this site in a while I've been trying to get by every day it's not working too well I'm struggling really really hard my family is still not around I guess they think I am OK that I'm doing fine little do theyknow that I'm not they are coming to my house this Saturday for a cook out because it's something my mother wanted me to do that's the only reason I agreed to… Continue

Posted on September 25, 2017 at 9:20am — 3 Comments

Lost

In September it will be two years since I lost my mother 9-6-15 and my husband 9-14-15 and since they left my family absolutely abandoned me no one talks to me no one seems to care if I'm OK all my friends that say they're my friends are liars they never talk to me either and it makes me start to wonder what the hell did I do so wrong that makes your family and your so-called friends just stop communicating when I ask if they're going to come visit soon they all have excuses oh I can't I'm too… Continue

Posted on July 2, 2017 at 2:41pm — 3 Comments

Trouble sleeping still

Does anybody else have trouble sleeping I can't seem to fall sleep I'm up night after night really really late usually wind up crying myself to sleep but no matter how tired I am I just don't sleep does anyone else have that problem i've had this problem since my husband got sick and it seems to of gotten worse almost 14 months he's been gone

Posted on November 12, 2016 at 8:06pm — 9 Comments

I feel like I have the plague

My mom and husband passed within eight days of each other in September of 2015. And now for the last year all my family has left me completely alone they don't call why is it when you lose someone like that everyone disappears all the people that said they were going to be there for you is not don't they understand how hurtful that is how do you handle that ???

Posted on October 8, 2016 at 1:00pm — 1 Comment

Comment Wall (3 comments)

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At 9:23am on December 28, 2016, Jarvis said…

Hi,  you may wish to check out the following link.  It's from Dr. Oz.  Let me know what you think of his suggestions.  http://www.oprah.com/health/Dr-Oz-All-Natural-Cures-for-Anxiety

At 10:05pm on November 12, 2016, Lisa said…
Please know that you are not alone. Nights are difficult with thoughts racing and wanting to sleep but you can't. I have to tell myself over and over to let the thoughts go. It's not easy but you made a promise to your husband and he wants you to be ok. Let me know how you are, please.
At 12:47pm on November 12, 2016, Fran said…

Pamela, I share your pain. My husband's diagnosis seems similar to your husband's. Not discovered for way too long and then much too late. Stage IV lung cancer. Just passed 2 years since he died. It's only now that I am starting to feel much of anything. He suffered for 8 or 9 months after the official diagnosis...but we were told it had probably been there for 4 years already. And that's what I don't understand...he'd been thru a couple of surgeries including a nose surgery just a month before diagnosis...why wasn't it discovered earlier? Anyhow, now I have to handle all the "little things" that he would've done. He survived to our 27th anniversary. Decisions were joint or he'd make it based on some input from me. It's taken me this long to just decide to repaint our bedroom! For me, finding myself, finding out what I want without any input from him , well, I'm just lost! I don't know who I am without him. I have 2 adult children who live with me and help keep things going, without them I'd be even worse. I have friends who are more supportive than my siblings. Thank God for them. Anyhow Pamela, we continue because we must.  Know that you are not alone on this forum. We all hurt. We all support each other thru this "new normal".

 
 
 

Latest Activity

Peggy left a comment for Aaron Hoenig
"I'm so very sorry for your loss Aaron.  I lost my husband to cancer as well.  He died in August 2015.  It's early days right now and I hope you are feeling well supported by your family and friends.  Should you ever…"
2 hours ago
Alice Thompson left a comment for nat
"Dear Nat, I’m so very sorry you had to lose your beloved husband. I wish you strength and comfort as you make your way through these early days and nights. There are many kind souls on this site who know about deep pain, and I recommend…"
7 hours ago
Profile IconKar-Kate Leung, nat, Ambreen and 5 more joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
9 hours ago
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Bluebell, my thoughts and prayers are with you. My brother called me the other day and he said are you ok? There is a twenty year age difference between us, so we are not that close and he lives five hours away. I said to him, yes I though you would…"
12 hours ago
BLUEBELL commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Another bad day. I was shopping for Christmas cards and gift bags when without warning, I broke down in tears at the register. Thank goodness the cashier was a sensitive caring person and did not just blow me off. She said "Your Mom will always…"
14 hours ago
Stephanie Coyle joined Courtney Adams's group
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Suicide....Hard Knowing They did it By Their Choice

This is for some of us who have lost someone due to suicide...I miss you Annie!!!See More
22 hours ago
Alice Thompson commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Thank you, Linda and Morgan. It just hurts so much for all of us."
yesterday
bluebird commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"((((((morgan))))))"
yesterday
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Paul, Each of us have memories of a time and day of the death of our beloved.  Mine just happened to come at a time of the year when normally the excesses of celebrating kick into high gear.  Not better not worse than anyone else's…"
yesterday
Elynn m commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"My friend just lost her husband before Thanksgiving.   I'm trying to reach out to her, because I know how she feels, but she does not seem to want to respond.  She's keeping very busy!  I feel bad for her, but I guess…"
yesterday
Elynn m commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Thank you, Linda for posting that.   "
yesterday
Peggy left a comment for Dawn W
"Hi Dawn, I saw your posts and wanted to introduce myself.  I'm also in Canada, in Ontario.  I lost my husband suddenly in 2015.  He had cancer but had been given 3 to 5 years and was gone in 8 weeks.  If you'd like to…"
Thursday
kim posted a status
"my beautiful son, its x mas again, ill be with you soon I promise, I love you forever mom"
Thursday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Alice, I am so sorry, I know you holidays will never be the same again, we just make the best of it. "
Thursday
Alice Thompson commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I feel the same. My love had a comprehensive stroke on 22 December, and died in hospital at 10pm on New Years Eve. Then I went “home” in a taxi amid fireworks."
Thursday
Profile IconAnn Appa, Alison Eley, Hannah and 3 more joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Thursday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Morgan & Paul, I feel exactly like you do, I wish I could sleep the holidays away, I find no joy in them, it's just another day I am being tortured."
Thursday
Paul commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Morgan, As hard as it is for the rest of us to endure the upcoming holidays it must be at least doubly difficult for you given the circumstances your husband and you were dealt with.  To everyone here who has put up with this hell for multiple…"
Thursday
Maxey is now friends with Cheyenne Steffen and Pamela philipp
Thursday
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Paul,  In particular this time of the year everyone who hasn't lost their love is celebrating.  I used to be one of them. Then one day a long time ago, I took my sick husband to the hospital Xmas Eve day and found out the day after…"
Thursday

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