Losing Someone to Cancer

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Losing Someone to Cancer

This is for anyone who has lost somone to cancer. I lost my adopted Mom to breast cancer some years ago. She was everything I could have asked for. She loved me because I was just me. She also loved my family and children as if they were her own.

Members: 550
Latest Activity: Jun 22

Discussion Forum

Completely Lost 6 Replies

Started by Shirley Thompson. Last reply by Shirley Thompson May 25.

Missing mom 2 Replies

Started by Spencer Paul. Last reply by Trina Mamoon May 15.

Guilt 9 Replies

Started by Donna Doucette. Last reply by Donna Doucette May 7.

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Comment by JO B on June 22, 2016 at 2:38am

she can do su thngs its verbl abus nite day i get on/off bt bean tld its gona get wors wev bean tld its gona get wors soon it wil atckin us 

Comment by Donna Doucette on June 21, 2016 at 8:00pm

Is she able to do anything for herself?

Comment by JO B on June 21, 2016 at 5:40pm

sum days i feal lk i wish i cud run go on run ocz of ths devilss ilnes dnt no wish 1s wors demsaha or big c bth bad i no 

its geti t yelid at e day or dif tmoods moods wish i dnt no im wored 1 day ill end u; bean kied kiled i am bit coz of guvmt cut bks in uk it wil hapen 

my nercs so bad im shaky so msuh on off i am

i feal lk thm in prsin prison seam 2 hav mre fred thn we do or i do its lk 1 crul blow aftr NR CRUEL BLOW U CUD SAY

latly i need 2 rabl on hear i just wory in cas i upset or ofenf ofedd anyy 1 on hear do

jiuts juts feals lk iv bean put thru hell i do

dad dieds in 2012 thn so mush loss

lk 201 so mush loss

thn 2014 loss

2015 loss

2016 loss

its lk iv brok a bedin miror coz of all shttyyyyyyyyyyyyyy luckk iv had u cud say

its nit slf pity its nt its me bean psit off inlif off in lif u cud say coz of all shitt iv had tost it me

i get mad u sea  a peado smirkin coz yju hav go way not bean pusnd

u sea seril kiler grinin thy go do it agan

thn  wy us on hear we v gt lif sentse u cud say 1s its lozin pepel 2 big c or had a ls2 s 1 its had it we or thyv got lif senytse of musij thm or sean thm suffer u cud  say

or we feal so sad coz of loss we had misiin person we had evn sad wen  kids not had lif get bi c or siuffr suffer u cud say

Comment by JO B on June 21, 2016 at 3:54pm

yep it can be k lk livin in helllllllllll u cud say its yellin hribl thngs bean sead it gets 2 me 

pepel say dnt let it get 2 me 

but i do 

Comment by Donna Doucette on June 21, 2016 at 3:52pm

It was hard, I would want to throw something, I would cry.  People would look at me with such pity and after he passed there were several people who told me.. now it's your turn to live.  I still have anxiety and I always think I wish I could talk to him, tell me what he felt and if he is at peace and ok.  We lived thru it though.  I keep thinking if I get sick, I will I be like that?  I would hate to put that on my daughter

Comment by Susan on June 21, 2016 at 3:32pm

You are both wise to walk away from your loved one and cool down and collect yourself when they don't treat you right. I've had to do that, too. It's far better than getting angry and yelling back at them. I've made that mistake, too. My husband could push my hot buttons easily and I sometimes got upset at him instead of walking away. I also did a lot of holding my tongue and not saying anything at all. I wasn't free to speak in my own home for many hours of each day unless I wanted a confrontation that would go nowhere but downhill.

Comment by JO B on June 21, 2016 at 12:06pm

pity thy dint giv us a book on howw 2 handl thes ortbrtst wen thy kikck off it us

its lk we 1s its get pusnhd u cud say i fw feal lk iv bean pusnd enuf i do

Comment by Donna Doucette on June 21, 2016 at 11:16am

I always had to put into perspective the disease.   I remember friends came and brought food, at this point my husband was in a hospital bed unable to walk.   I was about to eat and he called me, I started to walk to him and his buddy said hey Dan what do you need, I'll get it, Donna is eating and he got angry and said no I want her now!  No, I would never verbalize to him how tired I was or anything.  He had been given a 3 week life sentence at that point, I would have to walk away or go outside and collect myself.  Hospice had told us to expect this. That they are angry and they will take it out on the one they are closest to.  Life is always changing and I take nothing for granted.

Comment by JO B on June 21, 2016 at 10:19am

i thngs its got me so low  i getbyel yelld at it lst bit thngszb thngs i do i hav 2 go leve abot evry 5 or 10 mins just 2 cools off i do pepel relzin now i needd me tim im not bean selfs im not coz ths ilnes taks it ort of us iv begin 2 relzie 

Comment by JO B on June 21, 2016 at 10:06am

susan i dred wot moodss shes gona be in i do 1 days shes ok nxt day its lk all hellll let lose u cud say 

 

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Robin commented on Stephanie Dennocenzo's blog post Remembering hurts
"I know how you feel up until one week ago all I had was pictures I keep saying if we only had the voice well we do my daughter found a voice message on an old phone it brought tears to my eyes and it really didn't make me happy because the only…"
5 hours ago
Robin commented on CindyA's blog post Where is my peace
"I could not imagine lossing so many people I lost my soulmate and I feel like my life is over, I think we all are looking for peace. To be able to not feel so empty,lost and alone I hope that peace finds you"
5 hours ago
Robin commented on Denise's blog post Today is not a good one
"I know how you feel and understand my Kevin has been gone for six weeks today and everyday seems harder not easier. I have just learned to live with the fog my husband was cremated I have a necklace with his ashes around my neck, we did have a…"
6 hours ago
Mary commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Denise. We are here for you. I too don't like the word widow. I still feel like a wife but who has lost her husband. Was curious about how you feel about going to see a councillor- do you feel it helps a little. It's been 9 weeks since…"
6 hours ago
Denise Lavoie commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Today has been very hard.I went to my second counciling session  .I have not thought of myself in so long I don't know who I am. I am a widow now which I don't like.I am a mother, a grandmother, and a great-grandmother titles that…"
6 hours ago
Mary commented on Mary's blog post Heartbroken
"Hi Val. I live in Canada in British Columbia. It is so hard missing our husbands. It is hard to explain how we feel but you and others (Robin) share it's exactly how you feel. Yes I believe too Robin, that children's grief is different.…"
7 hours ago
Matthew Davenport replied to Matthew Davenport's discussion Lost My Beloved Wife On June 11th
"I am grateful to know there are others, but also saddened that so many have passed through these same awful gates into the world of grief. I send my sympathies as well. "
10 hours ago
Matthew Davenport replied to Matthew Davenport's discussion Lost My Beloved Wife On June 11th
"I thank you for the sympathy and thoughts. We are trying desperately to pick up the pieces she left behind and rebuild our family."
10 hours ago
Robin posted a blog post

Don't want this any more

I don't want this pain anymore, I feel like I can't breath without him yet I do, I don't want to face another yet I drag myself out of bed,I don't want anymore memories because he won't be apart of them anymore. I feel so empty I have tried more tears than I thought possible, I did not deserve him yet I was blessed to have him for 26 years he was my world and now he's gone I feel like nothing matters I don't want this anymore.
10 hours ago
Robin replied to Matthew Davenport's discussion Lost My Beloved Wife On June 11th
"Let me tell you I feel and understand your pain it has been six weeks today I lost my husband of 26 years and it hurts beyond words I don't know how to even tell you how to cope for me it is day by day I just want you to know your pain is felt"
10 hours ago
Robin commented on Mary's blog post Heartbroken
"I know exactly how you feel today is my six week mark and it hurts more now because the loneliness has set in I miss my Kevin so much it hurts so much, we have seven children but their grief is different my life stopped the day he passed.I feel your…"
10 hours ago
Alin Tooby commented on Denise's blog post Neutral
"Hello Denise,   I hope this message finds you well. I am very sorry for the loss of your dear husband. I pray you may find comfort and peace. I found your post to be a bit ironic as I just went and picked up my mothers death certificate three…"
12 hours ago
val commented on Mary's blog post Heartbroken
"Hi mary . i spent the afternoon moving furniture around lounge ,god knows why as i then put it all back, i suppose in my mind i thought if i dont have to look at his chair every time i come in the room it would be easier , but in fact it had the…"
18 hours ago
Mary commented on Mary's blog post Heartbroken
"Val. I'm sorry for your pain. I know your pain. I also feel it every day. No one understands it unless they have been there. And you are right, our children have different relationship with him. My kids are 25, 21 and 16. I try to be strong for…"
19 hours ago
val commented on Mary's blog post Heartbroken
"one week so far since my hubby passed and oh god it hurts , pain like no other ,feels so heavy ,i cry so much ,dose this ever end , everything is a reminder , even going to shop for a paper , I dont even read it , just feel i ought to have it , no…"
22 hours ago
val replied to Jennifer's discussion Buried with silence
"hi , yes I know , it consumes our every thought , my husband  passed last weekend , and its so empty now , its so painful, everything in our home we chose together ,24 years yesterday married , best friend,, and its all so many reminders ,…"
22 hours ago
val replied to Deborah Bailey's discussion Can any one help in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi deborah , I to feel the same, mine passed last week, and every day is so hard and raw, i have to go back to work soon and im a retirement schem manager and i live on site , so its in my face every day, they just keep on , every time i go out…"
23 hours ago
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Jennifer posted a discussion

Buried with silence

The pain hurts so much, I feel so along without my soulmate, he was everything to me, the one I dream of having family with. I jus can't live with this silent, bury my feeling everyday, pretend everything is ok, but I'm hurting and I have no one that I can feel to open up to. I'm crying in pain, it's been a while since I wrote on here, I just wasn't feeling it to do anything. My mom thinks once I get my life together, have a job soon, going to gym meet new friends, that I would feel better, and…See More
yesterday

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