Losing Someone to Cancer

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Losing Someone to Cancer

This is for anyone who has lost somone to cancer. I lost my adopted Mom to breast cancer some years ago. She was everything I could have asked for. She loved me because I was just me. She also loved my family and children as if they were her own.

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Losing my love of my life husband to lung cancer 9 Replies

Started by Toyanne. Last reply by Shirley Stacy Wallick 11 hours ago.

My uncles death 2 Replies

Started by Trey Osborn . Last reply by Wendy (Boabie) on Tuesday.

Finally realizing 3 Replies

Started by Chris W. Last reply by Sandi on Monday.

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Comment by Shirley Stacy Wallick on September 14, 2014 at 1:15am

Hello,  My name is Shirley and I recently lost my husband with Cancer.The Cancer was in five different parts of his body when he passed  April 29,2014. Been almost  four and a half months today and to me it seems like forever. We were an older couple and did things that older couplee often do.  He played golf, I would go and watch sometimes. We loved good movies,  he was an avid smoker, I did not smoke,  loved to listen to Country music, going out to a good family restaurant to eat, sit in the back yard and admire the flowers and trees,. He took care of the flowers. The day came when he could no longer do anything and my son and I became his care givers helped by Home Hospice of the Valley.  They were wonderful and brought everything he needed at the end of his life. He passed about 4:15 AM and the lady did not get here till close to 7:30 AM to pronounce him dead. Hardest this was when the wrapped his ravished body in white paper, tied  it in  different areas of the body and carried him out to the van. Then it dawned on me...He is gone and will never come back through our front door. Tears can only help for so long then reality sits in and the stress, pressures, documents need to signed, the people have to be notified and it seems like it goes on and on and never.stops. After four and a half months I have finally accepted that God wanted him to come home and his pain & suffering is no longer.  My plans are ..to one day , soon, to take my Journey Home and we will not have to good by any more. God is in complete control  and the day will arrive and my kids can start Memorial for me as I have for my hubby. My thoughts and prayers are for each of you that have gone through the hurdles I have.  Now we can say we take it one day at a time and try to smile as often as possible.   Shirley

Comment by anne on September 1, 2014 at 9:15pm

I really didn't think I'd be here in this group too, but today My best friend died of cancer. I hate cancer. There must be a cure out there somewhere. She was the nicest person I have ever known. She didn't judge anyone. She believed that even when you don't agree with someone you still should love them, and now she's gone. I have already buried both of my sons, and got through it because of what she taught me, and now I'm lost. Stupid cancer.

Comment by Linda K on August 27, 2014 at 7:08am

Hi ASKala,

I am equally sorry for your loss. I thought of my husband as my best friend, my heart feels like someone ran it over with something sharp. I talk to him and ask him to connect with me in a way I will know it is him, went away to NJ shore with kids who had never set foot on the beach at the ocean and came home to a single flower growing in my overgrown flower bed, not a variety already planted there, fully in bloom, want to believe it is him that made that happen. Having a hard time finding a support group in my town that works around the schedule of 4 kids who are all in activities outside of school. I will check out the facebook lead. Thanks.

Comment by ASKala on August 25, 2014 at 5:43pm
Hi Linda,
So sorry for your loss. I lost my husband to bladder cancer May 28, 2014. He was 59 years old. I wish I could share some magical, insightful words to help you "pick up the pieces." What I have found is that this is the most difficult and painful experience of my life. My husband was/is my soulmate. What's working for me is going to a support group to talk about my loss. I try to be kind to myself and not expect myself to be able to do too much. I'm learning that I'll never get over losing my husband. I am learning to take each day as it comes without him. I talk to him all the time so that I can get through each day. I found a support page on Facebook called Grief Speaks Out and her blog www.griefspeaksout.com which also has been tremendously helpful. Take care of yourself. Prayers and hugs.
Comment by JO B alexio on August 25, 2014 at 4:05pm

so sorry linda iv lost so mush faml 2 big c 

all i no 

i h a t e big c its evil its evil 

Comment by Linda K on August 25, 2014 at 10:42am

Hi I am new to this site and group. Lost my husband of 20 years whom I had been friends with since 18 to Acute Myleoid Leukemia, he was diagnosed 7/6/14 and died 7/26/14 and was only 53. I am wondering if anyone in this group lost a loved one to Leukemia can shed some light on how to begin to pick up the pieces.

Comment by marilyn rumball on July 9, 2014 at 12:36am

Mom also had lung cancer and was on oxygen for many years and lived a lot longer then they thought she would. 

 

Comment by marilyn rumball on July 9, 2014 at 12:34am

My family has had a very bad year and a half.  My favorite uncle passed away from cancer of the kidney in2012.  My mom passed away at 86 in Feb. 2013.  My spouse was diagnosed with follicular lymphoma in May of 2013.  My brother passed away in Sept of 2013 and my spouse passed away on April 30th of this year.  I read somewhere that a human body can tolerate or stand one dealth a year.  I guess that explains why at times it is so overwhelming.

 

Comment by Joe H on July 8, 2014 at 6:54pm

I've lost 4 siblings to cancer and none of them had the same type. I'm new to this group and will check in again later. Just thought I'd introduce myself though.

Comment by Pat on April 25, 2014 at 2:52pm

It's been 18 month since my husband died of esophageal cancer that had spread to his liver.  He went to the doctor the first part of Sept 2012, was diagnosed the last of September and died October 16.  Hospice was a true God send.

 

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Zell commented on kim's blog post my shawn
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Zell commented on kim's blog post my shawn
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kim commented on kim's blog post my shawn
"zell. thank you from the heart, yes everything you said is true.  I know you are here for me and I hope you know the same from me.  everyday I go see shawn , no one is out there I like it that way, I cry so hard and talk to him…"
5 hours ago
Zell replied to JO B alexio's discussion mad at god
"Love what you say Dennis: "I do completely believe that the future holds:1) The end of all suffering2) The end of all pain3) An abundance of peace4) The reunions with those that we have lost in death.Those things give me great comfort at times…"
9 hours ago
Zell replied to JO B alexio's discussion mad at god
"Hi Jo - yea, that can look rather funny hey :-)  but this is what it actually means: For we are strangers and sojourners (aliens) are used in conjunction with each other to imply that we are temporary residents on God’s earth…"
9 hours ago
Zell posted blog posts
9 hours ago
Zell commented on kim's blog post my shawn
"It's ok Kim. I can relate to you not wanting to "go public".  You need to feel absolutely comfortable about who you speak to.  Best maybe for you would be someone who has gone through a similar loss, or if not the same loss,…"
10 hours ago
Shirley Stacy Wallick replied to Toyanne's discussion Losing my love of my life husband to lung cancer in the group Losing Someone to Cancer
"Would like to say hello to all on this thread.It is almost five months since my hubby went to live in Heaven with Jesus. Has been a lifetime since then but with the help of Jesus, I am now slowly returning back to normal. Tears can only help for…"
11 hours ago
Eva Van commented on Karen's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"Linda, It's been 6 months since the loss of my daughter as well. I am still at the point that one day at a time is not comforting to me. All I feel is the pain... The Agonizing loss. My daughters birthday however was in June. There was no…"
13 hours ago
kim commented on kim's blog post my shawn
"thank you zell. yes everyday hurts so dam bad. I do feel very alone, I know no one that has gone through this pain here where I live. as for going to a support group, right now I just cant do it. I don't want to talk to someone that has not…"
21 hours ago
JO B alexio commented on JO B alexio's photo
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"i luv yore pic 2 zell i fogot 2 say "
21 hours ago
JO B alexio commented on JO B alexio's photo
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"thnx zell it tks abot 25/30 mins in a car or bus i cnt drive dont no hw 2 plus medicl resons iv bean on pic size its a web sit it cn mk yore pics biger or smaller 2 fit on difnrt sits i hav u can fix thn in 2 4 d as well u can hears a few i did…"
21 hours ago
JO B alexio replied to JO B alexio's discussion mad at god
"it wud be grt if wz no sufinrin we suffer 2 mush we do coz of deth we do no pain yea pease as well 2 sea evry 1 we lost never let go ever again  its grt we can all hav difrnt vews or sea thngs difernet as well"
21 hours ago
Zell commented on kim's blog post my shawn
"Dearest Kim, My heart really breaks for you in this added frustration and isolation you feel with your family unwilling or unable to meet your emotional need to talk about it, to talk about Shawn. I know what you mean. We seek that…"
22 hours ago
kim posted a blog post

life will never be the same

to my darling son shawn, everyday seems to get harder and harder to go on with out you. I cant remember what its like to sleep a full night, to not cry every day. to pray to go with you. how do I go on? how do I watch others smiling, laughing, shawn I need you so bad,i wear your things to bed I smell them all night long, ill never ever wash them, I need to know you have not left me alone. my heart feels like its slowly stopping, dear god I miss my baby, those beautiful big brown eyes that deep…See More
22 hours ago
Alexandra Raphaela left a comment for Michelle H
"Well thank you so much, and I am sorry about your lost as well. My prayers go to you."
yesterday

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