Losing Someone to Cancer

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Losing Someone to Cancer

This is for anyone who has lost somone to cancer. I lost my adopted Mom to breast cancer some years ago. She was everything I could have asked for. She loved me because I was just me. She also loved my family and children as if they were her own.

Members: 570
Latest Activity: 14 hours ago

Discussion Forum

I Wish Someone Will Take Care of the Paperworks for Free 1 Reply

Started by cin po. Last reply by Kevin Bailey Mar 19.

I feel worse 2 and a half years on, than I ever did. 6 Replies

Started by Michael Thompson. Last reply by morgan Mar 5.

Stupid cancer commercials 3 Replies

Started by Pamela philipp. Last reply by JO B Dec 27, 2016.

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Comment by Michael on April 16, 2017 at 11:35am

Katherine, your mom sounds just like mine.  I thought I was the only one who had a mom that loved you for who you are because the people I know never truly understood me but her.  You brought back memories as though mu mom was here with me right now.

Comment by loui gae on February 28, 2017 at 7:30pm

it is the worst for anyone has to go through fought a six year battle but it won out in the end my mate of fifty years is gone and there was nothing i could  to fix it 

Comment by JO B on January 28, 2017 at 11:49am

me 2 kevin it ruens livs it duz it kills us 2 2 sea loved 1s sufferr it can

Comment by Kevin Bailey on January 28, 2017 at 11:29am

I truly hate what cancer did to my beautiful wife, no one should ever have to go through that, cancer has stolen a precious gift from all of us. the pain I have isn't going anywhere, I really hate myself for not being able to do more, I tried my best but it was too strong, I remember trying to just get her to eat but she just couldn't, it would be a battle everyday to get her to eat or at least drink an Ensure. I didn't understand what she was going through, I just wanted her to eat and get stronger and come back to me. I just love and miss her so very much. I feel like I missed the flight she was on and got left behind. God knows I wanna get a flight to where she is right now but I gotta be here for our kids. My heart is broken never to be repaired again until I join my beautiful wife again.

Comment by Linda Engberg on January 28, 2017 at 7:32am

Hi Sherry,

I am so sorry for all your losses, this year I lost a nephew to bone cancer (48) and sister-in-law breast cancer (58), I also lost my dear Husband 4 years ago. Life has changed for me for the worse, Everyone I love is dying. My friend just lost her sister this week. I know death is a part of life but I can't wait until my time comes to be united with them.

God Bless You, Linda

Comment by Sherry on January 27, 2017 at 10:59pm

Hi, I recently stumbled on this site,,, my dad died 5 years ago, from pancreatic cancer,, poor guy went through major surgery, the whipple, only to find out they didn't get it all. Radiation, chemo gave him six months before he died. One year later, my younger brother was dx with stage 4 biliary cancer. He put up a good fight, no surgery, only chemo, which was the only thing keeping him with us, until he couldn't do it anymore. He fought hard for a year and a half, he died leaving behind his wife and10yo son. It was terrible sing my dad, but watching my brother die, was unthinkable. All I can say is, it was like having a front row seat to pain and suffering. My world changed,  and that person I use to be before they were diagnosed, she died too. Oh, and my mother died 1 year after my brother, not cancer, but COPD, it was so painful watching her suffer after the loss of my dad, then my brother. I still feel numb, sometimes it feels like a bad dream. Well, I guess this is a safe place to talk about losing the people you love, Thanks!

Comment by emma on December 27, 2016 at 9:19am

I lost to many people to cancer , the hardest one for me was my dad 10 years ago he passed away from brain cancer , the Christmas holidays are never the same anymore without our love ones that we lost ...

Comment by Kevin Bailey on December 24, 2016 at 10:16pm
I honestly just want to be with my beautiful wife right now, I honestly and truly hate the holidays right now. I used to look forward to them, being with my wife and helping her cook. I remember her stealing some of the cookies I just made and she'd give herself away by laughing. Now she's gone and I'm alone. I honestly believe that it's so cruel to be left behind after my wife passed. I would've been so happy to leave the same way they left on "The Notebook" cause any other way is just suffering.
Comment by Jan on November 29, 2016 at 9:12am

Here I go again. Go to bed at night with a bit of a better outlook on things - try to plan to do something useful the next day.  The morning comes and I'm like "what was I thinking"? I'm on my second vehicle since my husband passed. I put 32,000 miles on the first one in 12 months trying to run away from my feelings.  I traded it in and got this one 1 week ago w/42 miles on it. I now have about 500 and I'm getting ready to run again.  I tend to get worse if I have doctor appts. to face and I have 2 this week.  How I wish I could feel "normal" again. This pain is life changing and I never did take change well.  God bless you all.  I hope your fairing better than I am today.

Comment by morgan on November 25, 2016 at 11:33pm

Kimberly, There is nothing more you can do but what you already have.  It will have to be enough.  This isn't a test of how much... it is just how a deep connection works.  We will forever miss some of the people who have meant the world to us for the rest of our living days.  And hopefully one day that red thread will bring us together again in another time and place......We have only today, our present, the gift of our love.  You are and will be enough for her today.  Baby steps.......you will learn all about baby steps soon but try not to be too hard on yourself.  It takes away energy you need.  Its hard enough without adding to it.  Give her a hug for us.  We will be here for you like you are for her.......

Namaste,

morgan

(Namaste means " a recognition that the life force within us as individuals is the same as that within everything and everyone")

 

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Kevin Bailey commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"It is sad Trina but it is our truth. When my wife was here I'd dream about the good times that we would have when the kids finally cleared out. How I could really turn all the attention to her and spoil her, take her out and have date nights,…"
3 hours ago
BLUEBELL commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Theresa Thank you for your words of encouragement. I hope you are right. I pray that you find some enjoyment on your day off. Sending hugs and love you way, Bluebell"
3 hours ago
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Bluebell, being a hospice nurse has to be tough I think you are right because of your own experience you will be stronger than you think. I am off today and I am going to run errands it helps to occupy my mind, but not completely.  "
6 hours ago
Trina Mamoon commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I just read the recent posts and wanted to say how only this evening I was thanking the universe that we humans are mortal. Whether it takes another 30 years (and like Jackie the thought of another 30 years terrifies me and saddens me beyond words)…"
8 hours ago
Jackie cooke commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Your so right, a charade describes it exactly, just pretending all the time. I to have been left with not knowing how to do the bills, there is no money anyway now, I never did any of the finance stuff and the suddenness of her death meant there was…"
9 hours ago
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Digging deeper in my hole again........of course I'm not sure I mean, again......it seems like i think I emerge but then there I am again........digging furiously so I can escape.  This is the hardest, most painful, most misunderstood…"
12 hours ago
Kevin Bailey commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I was in denial even when they was talking about hospice. I was thinking she's not going anywhere, we're in recovery mood but I do need a nurse to help me with some things. Cancer is a wicked disease and it took my beautiful wife through…"
12 hours ago
Kathleen Jordan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I soo believe that....I see him, or feel him every day...It's hard to stay posititve...but   it works"
14 hours ago
Crystal joined Katherine Ellis's group
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Losing Someone to Cancer

This is for anyone who has lost somone to cancer. I lost my adopted Mom to breast cancer some years ago. She was everything I could have asked for. She loved me because I was just me. She also loved my family and children as if they were her own.See More
14 hours ago
Crystal commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Yeah, Ben was told 5 months at christmas, but he made it 3 months. It was fast and aggressive. He was on hospice for 1.5 months. He was up and walking around after his brain surgery in july, did great all the way till chriatmas, but the cancer came…"
14 hours ago
Kathleen Jordan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Crystal...you were lucky to have enough  time to learn while he was on hospice....I had 3  whole days of coherence.  But, I seriously did appreciate  it, even though he thought he was going to make 6 months"
14 hours ago
BLUEBELL commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I have been blessed with a very understanding set of people at work. They have told me to take my time coming back to work and have ask if there is anything they can do to help, just ask. They knew how much my life was centered on taking care of my…"
14 hours ago
Heather commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi Theresa, It is the same for me in terms of my job. I'm a special education assistant and have worked with kids for over 20 years with varying special needs. The last 5 years I have specialized in working with children with autism. I started…"
15 hours ago
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Heather I feel the same way and the weather here has been the same I'm in Pennsylvania You were not rambling It just lets me know I'm not alone Are used to always look forward to summer to go to the pool see my friends now I feel like I…"
15 hours ago
Heather commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi Theresa, I understand what you are talking about. I work in a very large school and have been there for 3 years and no one acknowledged or asked about how my mom was doing (I had to take some days off in the last month of the last school year to…"
17 hours ago
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"No Bluebell, any death is difficult for all of us right now. Sometimes though I feel numb towards others that have lost a loved one I have people come in to my place of employment all the time (jewelry store) that have lost parents and they seem so…"
17 hours ago
Crystal commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Same here. I've never been on my own. His beING on hospice , though he was able to stay at home, he was completely immobile, so I learned how to do all the things most men would do naturally, even paying bills, which I never have done. So he…"
18 hours ago
Jackie cooke commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I know, it shouldn't have happend and the thought of another 30 odd years alone terrifies me"
19 hours ago
Crystal commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"When I said "til death do us part" during our wedding vows, I never thought that that would ever happen.. I didn't mean it. He's still apart of me."
19 hours ago
Jackie cooke commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I'm just the same,,it's still we, us, ours I don't want to be I, me or mine. I signed an email jackie n Shirl the other day, realised what I'd done and it nearly killed me. I never want to be a single person"
21 hours ago

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