Losing Someone to Cancer

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Losing Someone to Cancer

This is for anyone who has lost somone to cancer. I lost my adopted Mom to breast cancer some years ago. She was everything I could have asked for. She loved me because I was just me. She also loved my family and children as if they were her own.

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Delayed Response 3 Replies

Started by Shayna. Last reply by Shirley Mar 19.

Lost my husband to acute lymphoblastic leukemia 1 Reply

Started by Debbie. Last reply by JO B alexio Feb 11.

feeling guilt 11 Replies

Started by Jennifer L Gebhardt. Last reply by Jennifer L Gebhardt Jan 15.

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Comment by Debbie 2 hours ago
Hi Shirley I'm sorry for your loss my prayers go out to you to .My one son gets S.S. Because he is high school, my other son is in college, he doesn't I do not get anything either .
Comment by Shirley 5 hours ago

Debbie.....Prayers for you and your boys. It has now been almost six months since your husband had to make his journey alone. As the days pass for you it will begin to ease up a small amount at a time. Lost my hubby last April 29, almost a year now, and my days seem to be somewhat easier to navigate through.  Things will never be the same yet until our time comes to take our journey, we have to do the best we can to move forward.      P.S.   Do you get SS for yourself and your kids now. They are the first ones who contacted me regarding finances coming in for me.

Comment by Debbie 5 hours ago
Hello all my sympathy goes out to all of you, I just have a question, My husband died in August at the age of 48 and left me with two boys when does it get easier every day I cry it's harder and harder it seems. Know job know money and know help from anyone.
Comment by Shirley 5 hours ago

JT....Just a few words to say hello and that I know how you feel about not being able to say goodbye to our loved before they pass over to Heaven. I had the same thing happen to me when my Mom passed. I received a call that my Mom was in a coma and I immediately left my home, in another State, and started to drive home. When we arrived we were told she had passed and they were not going to let me know until I got home. That was quite  a few years ago and today I still think about not being there to say goodbye.  I believe she knew I was on my way home and that I loved her very much. I plan on seeing her again soon and we will have a Joyous time strolling over Heaven together. Will send prayers for you and your family and always remember your Grandfather knew you loved him very much too.

Comment by JO B alexio 6 hours ago

im so sorry for evry 1 its had a loss coz of evil big c 

its so evil big c

Comment by Jt 7 hours ago

Thank you so much. This means a lot to me.

Comment by Fran 8 hours ago

JT, sorry to hear about your grandfather. It is evident that he meant a lot to you. Even tho you didn't get to see your grandfather before the end, I'm sure he knew that you loved him. Sometimes it's even harder on the person dying to see his loved ones crying over him...Hopefully, while he was alive you let him know how important he was to you. Cancer is an evil thing and cruel to the body. What you can do now is support your grandmother and mom and live your life so your grandfather would be proud. Sending you healing thoughts and prayers.

Comment by Jt 10 hours ago

About 3 months ago we found out that grandfather wasn't feeling very well. He's just not feeling very well today we were told. A month later we kept getting the same store, even though my uncle went down there to help cook and clean for my grandparents. We found out that my uncles and my aunt were taking turns caring for my grandparents, and that myself, my brother, and my mother were not allowed to go down to Florida from Maine. After one of my uncles had gotten home, I called him and he ended up telling me that my grandfather had inoperable bone cancer. After I spoke with my uncle, I called my grandmother and she told me everything that she knew. I, of course, told my mother and my brother. 3 weeks ago today my wife was speaking with my grandmother and was told how hard things are and how much pain my grandfather was in. My wife suggested hospice care since they could control the pain 24/7. My grandmother said that they and the Dr. were considering it. Tuesday night I did my daily phone call to my grandmother to see how things were going and was told that they were putting my grandfather into the ambulance to transport him to the hospice. My wife, my mother, and I loaded up my car and we drove down to Florida. My brother would be flying in on Friday. We left Tuesday night and go to my grandmothers at 10pm on Thursday the 5th. We were told that my grandmother wanted us to go straight there so she wouldn't be alone as my uncle was with my grandfather. We fell asleep with every intention of waking up early to go and see my grandfather. My wife was woken up before 7am Friday morning by my grandmother saying that my grandfather had passed and that she needed to go. My wife was told to stay at my grandmothers home and wait for further instruction. My wife was given the task of telling me and my mother that my grandfather was gone. We never got to say goodbye to him while he was alive. We went to the hospice to see him, but he wasn't the same Grampy that I had know my whole live. I will always remember seeing him in his death bed with his mouth wide open like he was gasping for air. My grandfather was for than just a grandfather. He was like a father to me, he was my hero, and my role-model.

Comment by Trina Mamoon on March 18, 2015 at 5:32pm

Hi Kathy,

My condolences for the loss of your mother. I, too, lost my mother in December 2011. For me, the first six-seven months were unbearable. I would think of her all the time and it would be very hard to make it through the day. Then gradually, after 2 years it got a little bit better. I think of my mother every single day now, but the pain is not so intense. It's more happy memories and regrets that she is not here anymore, but the sharp pain is gone.

Now I am dealing with the grief of losing my husband this past August. This is extremely hard to bear. Sometimes I can hardly breathe.

Sending good ives your way.

Best, Trina

Comment by Kathy Liz on March 18, 2015 at 5:14pm
Hi all, lost my mom in December to cancer. I have moments where feel overpowered of memories of her last few days.. Along with the day she died. I was her caretaker for the last month of her life..how long does this last... It is beginning to be overwhelming.... All I wanna do is sleep .. I am on anti depressants already.. And xanex.. But I am not liking this.

I know she wouldn't want me to feel this way, but I have this huge weight
 

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George H added a discussion to the group Lost My Spouse...
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Missing my wife

My wife passed on 2/24/15 like most of you it was just her and i.i don't have any friends so I spend all my time alone I was her caregiver for seven years right up until she passed not sure what to do next being with her is all I know we were together 37 years and I sure as hell don't see me getting over this all I have are bad days and nights it's getting real hard to handle my counselor says that I should do things in my own time but I don't seem to be able to do anything I still haven't…See More
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Tildyc commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Here's what I think John T. Just remember- it's just my opinion. But I'm starting to feel as if Mark can hear me in a sort of way... Kinda like when John-Paul said to still your mind. I find if I am in a very quiet place- and I try…"
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Debbie commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"Hi Shirley I'm sorry for your loss my prayers go out to you to .My one son gets S.S. Because he is high school, my other son is in college, he doesn't I do not get anything either ."
2 hours ago
Donna M Dowling-Hall commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
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John T. commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
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Tildyc left a comment for mike m
"Hey – what a terrible thing to have in common. Losing our spouses on the very same day. How are you feeling now?"
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Sheri H commented on Courtney Adams's group Suicide....Hard Knowing They did it By Their Choice
"Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem"
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Shirley commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"Debbie.....Prayers for you and your boys. It has now been almost six months since your husband had to make his journey alone. As the days pass for you it will begin to ease up a small amount at a time. Lost my hubby last April 29, almost a year now,…"
5 hours ago
Debbie commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"Hello all my sympathy goes out to all of you, I just have a question, My husband died in August at the age of 48 and left me with two boys when does it get easier every day I cry it's harder and harder it seems. Know job know money and know…"
5 hours ago
Shirley commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"JT....Just a few words to say hello and that I know how you feel about not being able to say goodbye to our loved before they pass over to Heaven. I had the same thing happen to me when my Mom passed. I received a call that my Mom was in a coma and…"
5 hours ago
Jason commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I agree with the writing in a book idea. Me and Amanda use to talk about anything joe everything. After she passed I missed talking with her, I had so much I wanted to say but no way to say it. One person suggested posting on her facebook but some…"
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vinnie perez replied to Orville Hamman Jr.'s discussion My wife in the group Traumatic, Sudden Loss
"So sorry for your loss, it is so hard to push through each day, I lost my husband, we were together for 40years, since I was 16. When you spend everyday together all those years ,you don't know anything else. Even down to making a cup of coffee…"
6 hours ago
Rj commented on Sheri H's blog post suicide letter, keep it or burn it?
"That is a tough question. I also have my sons note. It is very short. Some of the grief reading i have been doing suggest not making many decisions up to a year later. Perhaps you could wait until you have a more clear idea as what to do. everything…"
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JO B alexio commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"im so sorry for evry 1 its had a loss coz of evil big c  its so evil big c"
6 hours ago
Fran commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"As a nurse we "learned" the stages of grief and I agree, it's BS! I don't know that anyone ever really "accepts" death.  I did my writing in a book last year when Bill was diagnosed and kept it up until he died in…"
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mike m posted a status
"it was 2 days before her birthday and that morning found out were are going to have our first grandchild"
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Donna M Dowling-Hall commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I don't know if this will help anyone or not.  My counselor has me writing things down in a book.  Anything that comes to mind.  Questions for Jeremy, questions for myself, stories, observations.  She asked me if I felt his…"
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Losing Someone to Cancer

This is for anyone who has lost somone to cancer. I lost my adopted Mom to breast cancer some years ago. She was everything I could have asked for. She loved me because I was just me. She also loved my family and children as if they were her own.See More
6 hours ago

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