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Comment by Jesse's Mom on August 15, 2014 at 8:39am

It will be coming up on two years this October for me since I lost my son. Yesterday I had to contact the sheriff's dept regarding the woman who ran over my son (she killed him in his own lane and is being charged with vehicular homocide) . The woman ran away before the court hearing so we are now looking for her. The sheriff dept was actually snotty to me in the first email back. Like somehow I should not be asking for an update on her whereabouts and their efforts to locate her. I asked back in the second email, "if you are not the appropriate person to contact in regards to updates please indicate who correct person is"...and yes, the next email through was totally different in tone. It is sad when a victim of a crime has an uphill battle on everything, including those who are "sworn to protect and to serve". I  think they forgot that part. Also our sheriff is an elected official, I would like to ask him who he thinks he works for.

Comment by Adrianne Edgerly on August 15, 2014 at 2:06am

Dick I understand the guilt. Messes me up.
To all the others I read everytng you write and my heart cries for you too.
Lynn I will be thinking of your Kyra this Sunday as well as my boy.

Comment by Michelle W on August 15, 2014 at 12:27am

Dick,
What a beautiful bench.. It just feels special to me.. This time of year just kills me .. It is getting closer to the date and I just relive everyday like it is a VHS movie playing over and over in my head .. Back to school .. Oh my daughter came over with her b friend and a couple of girls that are close friends.. We BBQ and she casually sends me a video that was taken almost to the day two years ago of my son on our last family vacation, he was putting a diaper on a doll for one of those silly shower games at my sister in laws shower. I can remember watching he and thinking, well it will be a long time till he has to actually do this he is so driven and smart.. But he will make a great dad some day,,, right? Well it emotionally killed me again I watched it once.. I read the definition of PTSD again today.. This is definitely it.. And yes it is grief and guilt for not protecting my boy from the evils of the world.. We set a scholarship up to give out each year because my son was so much in helping with better others education .. He would want that but I need to do something more to honor him and the great kid he was..I hate this time of year everyday plays over and over..

Comment by Sigrid on August 15, 2014 at 12:05am

Missing my 16 yo son tonight. He died Aug.8, 2013 with his dad in a car accident. Laid on his still-unmade bed with its still-unwashed sheets with my head on his still-unwashed pillow and talked to him for awhile. I can't wait to see him again.

Comment by Dick on August 14, 2014 at 6:12pm

My pain is not only grief but guilt also, all wrapped up in a messed up piece.

Comment by Dick on August 14, 2014 at 6:10pm

Memorial Bench

Comment by Dolly on August 14, 2014 at 9:47am

every day I miss my boy... every night... all the time... I feel numb so much of the time now... except for that ache that never goes away... the longing and the pain... that never goes away ... ever....

https://search.yahoo.com/search?fr=mcafee&type=A111US605&p=...

could be a song to lament a frozen heart too....

Comment by Taylor's mom on August 14, 2014 at 9:34am

:'( rough couple of days. A year is quickly approaching and it feels as though no one understands.

Comment by Lynn Williams on August 14, 2014 at 7:50am

Adrienne I know what you mean. Last year Kyra was alive and we were visiting her in Montana. She died on August 17, 2013. I am going to see a LI medium show in Albany that day by myself I sure hope Kyra comes through. Love to all here.

Comment by Rachel on August 14, 2014 at 3:01am

I agree Linda. For so long we mothered our babies. Stayed up worrying about them. Made sure they were safe and had everything they needed. Even as they got older. They were still out babies. And now, we are left wondering if they are "okay"?
Do they need us? It's not fair. It's just not fair. I just recently losty my daughter. She was the only beauty in my life. I feel so lost. I don't know what to think. Every now and then I sometimes feel I hear her say "I'm okay Mom". But as a parent we still worry. If all they need is our "Love" they have that ALWAYS.. If all they need is our prayers they have that TOO. It's not fair, it's not fair to any of us. My heart aches for you and your loss. I send you my love and hugs. Sincerely, Rachel

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