Toni Jones
  • Female
  • North Pole, AK
  • United States

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About Me:
I am a daughter, sister, mother, and wife. I've lived in 5 states of our United States. Currently we are in Fairbanks Alaska. My husband Mark, my son T. Jay and my 2 dogs are living in a wonderful little cabin that is surrounded by mountains. There is a serenity here that I don't think I could have found anywhere else.
About my Loss:
I hate the term "I lost...". I didn't lose me son. I know exactly where he is...and where he isn't. November 19, 2014 my youngest son, youngest child, was in a single vehicle wreck. The next day my baby boy, 30, was pronounced due to traumatic brain injury.

Toni Jones's Blog

Why won't any one help me??

Please, please, please!! Why won't  any one help me?? The 20th of this month  is the one year anniversary  of my Jamey being taken  from us, and he still doesn't  have  a  headstone. I have done everything  I  can  but I  admit that I  can't  do it alone. The one I have picked for him and made the non-refundable  down payment is beautiful. It has a picture of him in cameo with a waterfall on black granite. Yes, it's expensive, but why would I give him some cheap thing that just says there's …


Posted on November 28, 2015 at 9:52am

Organ donor/recipients

The sadness just keeps getting worse. My son, Jamey, was an organ donor. I know that 3 men in their 50s received his gifts. To be absolutely honest, I was not happy to find out that they were in their 50s because I thought he would have wanted to give a younger person a chance for longer life. But, 2 of the men who were recipeints wrote me letters. I am in my fifties and hope like we all do that we are going to be around until we are in our 100s. After the letters, I'm pretty sure Jamey…


Posted on September 9, 2015 at 7:12pm

I mean no disrepect

What I have laying so heavy on me today is this...why won't churches do more to help their community. I am angry and I will be angry for an unknown amount of time. I can't keep it to myself or I feel like I'm going to explode. But, I have asked several "friends" of mine to ask their churches to help me raise the money for Jameys headstone. They can raise money for a trip to Disneyworld or for the pastor a new car or a vacation trip for the congregation because it's exhausting being a…


Posted on September 6, 2015 at 3:29pm

Why bother

I'm wondering why bother with calling out the name of an all seeing, all doing creature that would steal the life of a child and then tell us it was Mr. High and Mightys plan to begin with!  I'm so pissed off right now! We throw people in the deepest darkest hole we can find if they have killed anyone. But this great big wonderful loving monster is thanked every day for his miracles. Even when he's the one that did the killing. How does that make sense? If "he" has a plan for everyone, the…


Posted on September 4, 2015 at 4:49pm — 1 Comment

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At 1:39am on September 7, 2015, Gita KG said…

Lots typos, sorry Toni...but I am sure you understood my comment

At 1:37am on September 7, 2015, Gita KG said…

Unfortunately  Toni people will say what they will and judge. You knoe howbbeautiful and wonderful your son was and still is in your heart. It sounds like he struggled and persevered showing enormous strength. I do understsnd this, I work with men as avtherapist who struggle with substance use.Try to hold onto what you know of him not what others say

At 11:45pm on September 6, 2015, Gita KG said…

Thank you Toni, for your words and I offer you a big hug... I read your above posts, my personal opinion is that you should not worry about how you express your pain and anger just that you express it.  This experience truly sucks!  It's hard to imagine that there's a purpose or reason for it and it's not fair.  I ache for you and many parents that have lost their child.  No one should.  

At 7:10pm on July 8, 2015, Gita KG said…
Toni, I am heartbroken reading about your son's passing. Life seems so surreal. I still feel like my son will walk through the door. I agree with you about the word "lost". Wishing you times of peace
At 5:14pm on June 8, 2015, Connie K said…

Hi Toni

I am so sorry for your loss. I also lost my son in a car accident. That was 30 months ago - he was 17. I hope you can find support and hope here. We are all here for you. Hugs.


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"Hello, I am a newbie.  I lost my father on May 22nd at 2.22am. He was 92 years old.  Loosing him is the hardest thing I have ever gone through.  I really miss him.  We were able to have a funeral for him but there were so many…"
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My Story

When I was twelve my mother was murdered then my beloved sweet grandmother died when I was 18. My maternal grandfather died when I was 22. My maternal grandmother died when I was 33 and my final living parent/grandparent died when I was 35.  I lived with a lot of loss most of it came at a sudden clip.  I'm left with incredible feeling of loneliness even though I've been married for 20+ years and have two wonderful children.  It's tough to share my true feelings with my wife because it's so hard…See More
Christian Miller added a discussion to the group surviving family members' murders

My Story

When I was twelve years old, my mother was brutally murdered during a robbery of our home.  I came within minutes of finding her body but by sheer chance I didn't.  It has been over 35 years since that day but it still effects my life today.  As a child, I went through the trial of the man convicted of killing my beautiful mother then as a man I went through his parole process finally his death from illness in prison. See More

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