I'm Wife and mom . My daugher is nineteen and has moved home to help me...
About my Loss:
On November 26 2011,I lost my 17 year old son in a multiple roll over car accident. He was the passenger , driving with a friend comming back from a state playoff football game. The game was held in a city that was hours away. My son was extremely special to me and those who knew him. He had a very bright future with school and music.
I lost my daughter four months ago in a freak car accident. She was 26 and my comfort too. I started going to see a bereavement counselor a few weeks after her death and continue to go every week. I also joined a grief group for mothers who lost a child once a month. It is run by the same counselor. This has helped me a lot and I would reccommend you to look into seeing someone. This is the hardest event to live through. I have another daughter who is 23 and two step sons with families.Everyone lives so far from us and that is very hard for me. We spent christmas in New Mexico with one of my stepsons and my daughter came down too. I live in Vermont and the frigid gray winter is not helping my mood. Peace and hugs.
Thank you so much Michele. I'm still trying to figure out this website and it was so nice to get your reply. Right now we feel so alone and overwhelmed. I don't even have the energy left today to say anything but that I am grateful for the support of all of you who know this terrible grief and wish you all some peaceful moments when your child's spirit surrounds you.
my son and only child was killed on Dec.1, 2012 as a passenger in a car as well. He was 17 years old. I feel your pain so completely. The driver while I'm sure feeling his own pain, has not apologized or manned up to his actions (speeding, passing illegally on a wet road - I'm sure he thought he could handle it all). The pain of not having my son, my only child and having to deal with the legal process, anger, guilt, regret, etc etc is overwhelming. I just joined this group and as I look at the pictures of your son I realize he was a musician. So was my son Daniel. My husband and I are both professional musicians and Daniel was always joining in and learning new instruments and well as producing his own music. How I would give anything to hear him again. He was incredibly talented and I miss him so much. I know how devastated you are because I am too. And with no other children, our lives and future seem empty. It is all so unreal. My heart goes out to you.
You have suffered such a horrible loss. I cannot even imagine how a mother deals with such a loss. My heart aches reading about your son. I am glad to hear your daughter has moved home. That is a comfort I am certain. I will include you in my thoughts and prayers. This site provides a tremendous amount of support and comfort to me. I hope it does for you as well. There are no answers to the questions you must ask yourself. We never know why someone is taken at the age they are or in the way they were taken from this earth. From us. The reality of living without them physically here is an every day challenge. For me I just know that at any given moment and place I could be next and be reunited with my family in heaven. That's one of the things that keeps me from just giving up on myself and this life. How blessed you were to have such a wonderful son even for a short while. I got pregnant was I was really young and was selfish and had an abortion. I still hate myself for that. I wish I had been more together and had a more stable frame of mind back then. Made better choices. Your son is still your son he is just in another place surrounded by wonderful people and still playing his music. As much as there is good in the world there is evil. Evil created the accident - God wrapped his arms around your son and took him to heaven so that he would not suffer. Sue
GM and hello and im so so sorry for your loss unreal this to me how many of our babies are taken so randomly so unfairly and yes i have Sarah and she is what matters i can not bring amber back matter of fact the other day i looked over at amber's picture and turned it around said to her im so mad at you so angry how could you not listen to us your sister and i begged you to please stop , we asked you did you ever stop to think what it would do to your sister and i if you were to overdose and you took it all as nagging and me being controlling and your sister being the good little girl playing on moms feelings i had this whole conversation with her while Sarah sat on couch watched me then she said im glad you said that mom i feel like that at times about her but then feel guilty because shes gone and more guilty because your so so sad so Ty i don't feel so bad any more ...any how Ty for all the kind words ..talk soon...
Sue, you are right a child and mother have a special
bond and I'm so sorry for your loss .. My mom just
came down for the funeral and I tooan close to my mom
so it will be hard for me and yes I do know your pain..
my son was half way through his senior year, getting ready t
to go to college and start a spectacular life.. He loved
everything.. He is all over the web this was not private what
happened and I have to relive every minute over and over..
At this time things are very unbearable... It's like a bad crime movie....
I was so proud of my son Billy he would have been someone
Great as an adult.. He would have been eighteen Sunday ...
May of his friends were there again to pay respect for my son on his birthday..
First of all...I am so deeply saddened to hear you have lost your son. Your burden is beyond measurable. Life forever changed. The why's ....there are no answers that we know.
Why your son? If you can possibly take one minute at a time, then one hour...one day...how ever you can do it. When I start to go to a dark place thinking about my mother dying before me...the life leaving her face...I have to tell myself "I can't go there".
The bond between mother and child and child and mother - a bond so special, so strong, just so unbreakable. You lost your child. I lost my mother - she was devoured by cancer.
Loosing a child has to be the hardest. My mother was not 17. She had lived a nice life of 77 years. You have a long painful road ahead Michelle. No one will sugar coat what you have to overcome on the site.
Loss of your job, purchasing a new home...stressful on its own. My heart is very heavy for you right now Michelle. For those of you who have lost children - I have no idea how you can even get out of bed each day. But we all have to. Please accept me as your friend and part of your support system. If you need to talk 941-809-8673. Hugs and Love Sue
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