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  • Greenfield, MA
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About Me:
I am a mom, friend, sister, daughter. I love nature, it is one of the few places I find peace at this time. I am raw with grief from losing my son Silas, and don't know what to do with it. Sometimes I wonder how I have kept putting one foot in front of the other since his death.
About my Loss:
I lost my 29 year old son Silas to cancer a little over three years ago. I am having trouble coping.

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Christmas time~miss you Sy guy

Four years ago at this time, Silas was here fighting cancer, the disease that doesn't show itself in anyway that allows for fighting fair. What the hell, since there were no clear rules, it seemed right that Silas should come up with a few rules of his own. The most important rule; he would do things his way. He would listen, assess, and act accordingly. Because Sy was diagnosed with stage IV cancer that included mets to his spine, he was feeling very sick pretty much from the time of his…


Posted on December 15, 2011 at 9:07pm — 4 Comments

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At 7:05pm on October 3, 2014, Gale Brunault said…

Hi Lorraine,  I lost my only child to an apparent drug overdose in June of this year.  I'm from Mass. and decided to look for anyone living in my area.  I loved your love story about "Sy" and was wondering how you are doing?  I guess I'm looking to get an idea of what grief looks like 3-5 years out.  For me the pain is constant and I am just so sad and down.  Anything you can offer would be greatly appreciated.  Thanks for sharing your story - beautiful tribute.


At 12:20am on May 10, 2013, Karen R. said…

Hey Lorraine, just saying hello and sending hugs.

At 12:17am on February 28, 2013, Emily said…

I"m sorry about your son, please feel free to message me anytime.

At 8:11pm on December 8, 2012, Karen R. said…

Hey Lorraine, sorry I missed your chat, thanks for the shout out, still trying to hang in there, I don't know how we do it, sending hugs back to you.,

At 12:30am on November 1, 2012, Karen R. said…

Thanks Lorraine, I'll take all the hugs i can get ! so nice to hear from you, we just have to keep trying to hang in there for our loved ones that still need us.

At 9:31pm on September 1, 2012, Karen R. said…

Hello dear friend Lorraine, Unfortunately, I know exactly what you mean, nothing is getting easier for me either. I hate the way I'm always feeling. I long for my son sooooooooooo much. It's like I can't move forward, I am stuck in my pain. I find myself sitting back watching everyone enjoy life. I have some days that are better than others. You are always in my thoughts as well. I hope that someday we feel find the peace that we need.

Love, karen

At 9:37am on December 13, 2011, Sue Waxman said…

Dear Lorraine,

You son - very handsome and strong. I can see it in the photos you have shared. My mom died on June 26, 2011 of cancer. She passed away right in my arms. That day haunts me always. I miss her every second. She was my only parent. We were very close. The bond between a child and parent is one that is never broken, even when they leave us behind and move forward without us. The holidays are so extremely lonely for me. Mom and I share Dec 19th as our birthday. I don't have a big family, so the generosity, love and support I have received on this site has been unmeasurable for me.

Please accept my friendship and know that you pain is well known to me. I experience it 24 hours a day myself. But, we must muddle through life until it is our turn to move on.

Fondly, Sue

At 5:33pm on December 6, 2011, MIchael A Ballard said…

Hello Lorraine and I'm glad to make a new friend.

My mother left us on 12-30-10, then my wife on 04-01-11.

My mother was ailing badly, but my wife's departure was so sudden.

Sometimes we have to evaluate the grief feeling and separate it from the trauma experience.

Those two are very difficult to deal with and accept, but we can still have the good things in our life, the love and memories.

We're all equal on this site with our situations, also we're all equal because our time will be up one day.

I believe in Love over death, and remembering and honoring alongside of grief.

Hope you are doing well,


At 10:40am on December 4, 2011, Dick said…

Lorraine, thanks for sharing the video. It brought me to tears as well. My son passed quickly with no warning and I do not have movies of him unfortunately. Will the pain ever ease?

At 1:25pm on September 25, 2011, Ammy said…

Thanks Lorraine.  I can understand your trepidation over October coming.  I have just gone through an emotional time because of the season change.  It is always something that brings them to our mind.  Even simple everyday things can produce a memory that makes the heart feel the ache.  I'm often surprised with these fleeting thoughts that bring on the tears for what seems like no reason.  

I know it's hard, but I hope you will find some comfort in the coming days.   Hugs.



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