Gail Richardson
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  • London
  • United Kingdom
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Gail Richardson's Blog

I Can Hear you Whisper - by Sandy Goodman

I CAN HEAR YOU WHISPER



In the mornings

I reserve my drive time

To say hello to you

And to feel you surround me

With your violet eddy of emotions.

In the beginning, a hundred years ago (or was it yesterday?),

My trips to town were for crying,

For screaming,

For asking you over and over and over again

WHY YOU HAD TO LEAVE,

But now it's different.

Now we share the sunrise.

We listen to music,

We reach for…
Continue

Posted on March 21, 2010 at 4:52pm — 1 Comment

The Grief of Fathers

The Grief of Fathers



Fathers are cast in a societal role that is different from that of the

mother. Although there are many role crossovers and although frequently

the deep strength in a family is in the mother, society expects, and

fathers themselves expect, that they be the “strong ones.”



Generally the father is the major support of the family, and he plans to

meet his current expenses, insure against the unanticipated, save for the

anticipated… Continue

Posted on May 31, 2009 at 5:30pm

oneday9.jpg The Emotional Roller Coaster Child loss brings with it an array of mixed emotions. Parents can feel anything from sadness and depression to extreme anger at everyone and anything. Some …

oneday9.jpg



The Emotional Roller Coaster



Child loss brings with it an array of mixed emotions. Parents can feel anything from sadness and depression to extreme anger at everyone and anything. Some days the tears will flow like a river for no apparent reason. Other days the language that pours forth from your mouth will… Continue

Posted on May 27, 2009 at 3:44pm — 2 Comments

The Awakening

A time in your life when you finally get it.



When in the midst of all your fears and insanity,



You stop dead in your tracks, and somewhere in your head cries out -



ENOUGH!



Enough fighting, crying, or struggling to hold on.



And, like a child quieting down after a blind tantrum,



your sobs begin to subside, you shudder once or twice,



you blink back your tears and through a mantle of wet lashes



you begin to look… Continue

Posted on May 12, 2009 at 4:25pm

Close By your Side

You think I've gone far away and life has lost its will,

But look around, I am right here, living with you still,

I watch your tears, I feel your pain, I see the things you do,

I weep as well, each time you cry, my soul it lives with you.

It gives me such joy to hear you laugh, and do the things you do,

And when you smile over bygone days, I smile right there with you,

For we are still one, just you and me, one mind, one soul, one being,

Walking forward into… Continue

Posted on May 10, 2009 at 4:47pm

Comment Wall (9 comments)

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At 10:23am on December 21, 2011, Sherry Bell said…

I hope you are doing ok Gail. I just wanted you to know your kind words of someone that understands ment so much to me! I will write more later just wanted you to know i was thinking about you and your family. Also the kind words you sent to me. luv Katelynes mommy

At 9:51am on February 25, 2011, Sherry Bell said…
thank u yall help me at my worst times becuse yall know the pain
At 9:27am on June 29, 2010, Darren Mitchell said…
Gailm I am not sure if you have figured it out yet... But it appears that a new member cynthia ie baby.cynthia29@yahoo.com is not really looking for grief support. I received a private message from her that suggests a longer term sexual relationship. Not only that if you look at her comments as of June 28th you will see dozens of them and they are not comment but form letters. Yahoo is well known for infiltrating site with their pornographic advertising which come from "mostly" underage Asian girls.

Would you please mention this to someone that can look into it? Thanks. I hope I am wrong.
At 2:14pm on May 16, 2010, Pastor Jenine Marie Mason said…
Thank you for the birthday wishes for Jayson. We all love and miss him so much! blessings honey...
At 2:28pm on January 28, 2010, Trudy F. Evans gave Gail Richardson a gift
Gift
Thank you Karen. Do appreciate your kindness. My eldest son was born on Feb. 6th and died on Feb. 8th. My younger son was found dead the morning of Feb. 2nd.
At 10:08pm on September 22, 2009, Dee Dee said…
Thank you so much!
He was trying so hard. My heart is broken
At 6:13pm on July 17, 2009, Laura Villarreal said…
Gail, thank you for the beautiful and heartfelt words! I have received sympathies from people who say things like "it must be difficult" or "I know how you feel" but when I ask how they were able to work through the loss of their child they reply with something like "oh, I have never lost a child but I can imagine". I have literally quit going out and taking phone calls. I will only talk to certain family members and I only communicate with all others via email or text. I know they mean well but it just makes me angry because "you cannot imagine the pain and suffering I am going through"! The best sympathies I have received are store bought sympathy cards that have been signed with love, prayers and thoughts. Sometimes less is better.
My thoughts and prayers are with you, too.
At 3:51am on May 10, 2009, Gail Richardson said…
A SALUTE TO MOMS ABLE TO CARRY ON
BY: Erma Bombech
May 13, 1995



If you’re looking for an answer this Mothers Day on why God reclaimed your child, I don’t know.
I only know that thousands of mothers out there desperately need an answer as to why they were permitted to go through the elation of carrying a child and then lose it to miscarriage, accident, violence, disease, or drugs.
Motherhood isn’t just a series of contractions; it’s a state of mind. From the moment we know life is inside us, we feel responsibility to protect and defend that human being. It’s a promise we can’t keep. We beat ourselves to death over that pledge, “If I hadn’t worked through the eighth month.” “If I had taken him to the doctor when he had a fever.” “If I hadn’t let him use the car that night.” “If I hadn’t been so naive, I’d have noticed he was on drugs.
The longer I live, the more convinced I become that surviving changes us. After the bitterness, the anger, the guilt, and the despair are tempered by time, we look at life differently.
While I was writing my book, “I Want to Grow Hair, I Want to Grow Up, I Want to Go to Boise,” I talked with mothers who had lost a child to cancer. Every single one said that death gave their new lives meaning and purpose. And who do you think prepared them for the tough, lonely road they had to travel? Their dying child. They pointed their mothers toward the future and told them to keep going. The children had already accepted what their mothers were fighting to reject.
The children in the bombed out nursery in Oklahoma City have touched more lives than they will ever know. Workers who had probably given their kids a mechanical pat on the head without thinking that morning were making calls home during the day to their children to say, “I love you.”
This may seem like a strange Mothers Day column – a day when joy and life abound for the millions of mothers throughout our country. But it’s also a day of appreciation and respect. I can think of no mothers who deserve it more than those who had to give a child back.
In the face of adversity we are not permitted to ask, “Why me?” You can ask, but you won’t get an answer. Maybe you are the instrument who is left behind to perpetuate the life that was lost and appreciate the time you had with it.
The late Gilda Radner summed it up pretty well. “I wanted a perfect ending. Now I’ve learned the hard way that some poems don’t rhyme and some stories don’t have a clear beginning, middle and end. Life is about knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what is going to happen next. Delicious ambiguity.”

"Hope" is the thing with feathers...
That perches in the soul...
And sings the tune without words...
And never stops at all.....
(Emily Dickinson
At 1:30pm on May 9, 2009, Jarvis said…
Welcome to the community.
 
 
 

Latest Activity

Emma Milner joined Jarvis's group
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I love my Dad.

For everyone that has lost their Dad.
4 hours ago
Profile Iconkiran singh, Cheyenne Steffen, Emma Milner and 3 more joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
14 hours ago
Michaela waldier commented on Julie Dolsey-Weiss's group Traumatic, Sudden Loss
"Well, the finality of it all has set in;recieved my hunni's ashes and death cert finally from Alaska.He's been gone 9 weeks. Im no longer angry,im moving towards finding a happy medium, didnt have the luxery of laying around in defeat,have…"
yesterday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I was so glad that I was able to do everything my mom needed as a caretaker but that did not make her death any easier. I still lost her. I still have the finality of death in my mind that hits me every day like a sledge hammer. And it's the…"
yesterday
Lisa Green commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Brett,  Life is so hard and it's definitely not fair. No one should ever have to lose their Mom at any age.  My mom has been gone for 20 months and I still miss her terribly and I do still talk to her out loud in my car. It makes me…"
yesterday
Louise joined Desiree's group
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When will the ache subside?

A group for people who have lost loved ones with prolonged suffering. For those of us who have seen that the end is coming, and had to watch the ones we love creep toward it.
yesterday
Louise replied to Ashley Lounsbury's discussion I lost my daddy to suicide.
"I’m so sorry Ashley, your situation sounds truly horrendous, life seems so unfair. My husband died from suicide on 29/30 September; I have the uncertainty because he disappeared for a night and wasn’t found until the next day, so…"
yesterday
Louise posted a blog post

Does Counselling Really Help?

I’ve not been on here for a while, it’s been so hard just trying to get through the days; keeping myself busy, trying desperately hard not to think about things and often failing miserably. I’m so tired of feeling so shitty all the time. I had my first session with a counsellor today, after feeling initially nervous and not wanting to say much everything came out and I cried like a baby. I feel absolutely drained now and very emotional. So my question is this, does counselling really help or…See More
yesterday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Morgan, I feel the same as you it has been 4 years 3 months my wonderful husband died. I wish God would just take me. All I am is a zombie walking around in this hell. Linda   "
yesterday
Trina Mamoon commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
""All I want, like most of the rest of you, is to reunite with my husband.  I want to know he is ok.  I want to hold him again.  I want his love.  The sooner the better." Morgan's words, simple yet so profound,…"
yesterday
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Bluebird,  I find myself wanting to kick over tables or throw something hard at times and yet my old catholic upbringing kicks in and disallows me to act out but I get the same feelings.  In the beginning I used to kick a cardboard box a…"
yesterday
morgan replied to Ashley Lounsbury's discussion I lost my daddy to suicide.
"I really don't know what to say Ashley.  I'm so sorry.  There is some kind of weirdness in this universe that seems to have its way with us when we are not at all prepared for how to handle it.  Death by any means is hard to…"
yesterday
Ashley Lounsbury posted a discussion

I lost my daddy to suicide.

My daddy was a us navy veteran who brutually killed himself on September 27, 2017 at the age of 51.My Daddy had become really emotionally sick in recent years. He was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia. Which of course he didn't believe because he thought that was the Va trying to control him. He became really hard to be around as he has these crazy conspiracy theories and he heard and saw things that didn't exist that proved to him he was right. Then he started believing people were out to…See More
Sunday
Nancy commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I'm the same way bluebird"
Sunday
bluebird commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"And along with being incredibly sad all the time, I am also very angry, all the time.  Right now I want to jump out of my fucking skin, I want to punch everything, I want to yell and scream. I can't even contain this level of anger;…"
Sunday
bluebird commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Absolutely, Paul.  We do not deserve to live in this hell."
Sunday
Paul commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"bluebird, As bad as I feel now, I do not look forward to the holidays as this will be the first holiday season without my beloved wife. We also met on a New Year's Eve and I am really dreading that day. I can't see myself lasting years on…"
Sunday
bluebird commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Same here; I feel just like morgan and everyone else. My husband died five years ago, and my "life" is no better -- in many ways, it is worse, both as a result of his death and due to other factors.  For me, the pain of his death, of…"
Sunday
Paul commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"This seems to be an especially hard time for a lot of us lately. I feel exactly the same way as the previous 4 posters."
Sunday
Marine Marietta posted a group
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Elderley Abuse Mum died

I lost my mum in September. She was subject to elderly abuse by my older sister. I dont know where to start from. The anger and rage I have for my elder sister, its not funny. I try to get the vision out of my head, and how she treated my mother. The pain is excruciating that i feel, I need to join my mother. I spent a week in the crises centre. I hope this grief and anger passes.Question: how do I accept or come to terms with the matter.I do have evidence supported by my other siblings. The…See More
Sunday

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