Jon-Paul Ackerman
  • Male
  • Tavares, FL
  • United States
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  • Maxey
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Latest Activity

Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Joe, I was thinking the same thing take me and protect my family. I am hoping like you."
Mar 17
Joe Kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Linda, For you, me and many here, we may soon have our prayers answered.  I just pray it's just me and not my children or grands.  That will hopefully be the case."
Mar 16
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"PLEASE GOD, JUST TAKE ME"
Mar 1
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Martee, I am so sorry for your loss. I feel we all have had some regrets when losing a loved one, but we still try to go on in this world, even when we don't want to."
Feb 29
Martee commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Sorry for your losses as well. I am at 30 days since my husband was overtaken by severe depression and alcoholism, he took his life at 58 yrs old, he didn’t even know he did he was so out of it. I am free falling still and my life is over, I…"
Feb 28
Martee joined Jon-Paul Ackerman's group
Feb 28
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Bluebird, Thanks for your kind post. I feel the same as you about getting another pet. No other dog could ever take her place and no man could ever take the place of My Dear Husband, Julian. As with you, I don't want to face anymore deaths…"
Feb 22
bluebird commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I feel the same as both of you. morgan, I'm sorry you had a particularly bad day -- I certainly know what that's like. I hope today is easier for you. Linda, I know what you mean about your dog. When our cat died, aside from the sadness I…"
Feb 22
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Morgan, I just wish I could have died with Julian. Like you, everyday I just go through motions. I am blessed with my Sweet Dog, Babie J. I am living for her. She now has dementia and it is so sad to watch her declining. She has been by side…"
Feb 22
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Amen Linda.......Today for whatever reason was a particularly rough day.  I am exhausted from crying.   I just don't know how long I can keep pushing forward.  I am definitely in the hate mode......."
Feb 21
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
Feb 21
Nancy commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I love that explanation Linda!!!"
Feb 12
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
Feb 12
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Jen,  I agree. I would hate to waste all this suffering if it screws up my transit and reunion with the other half of my soul but how much is one person supposed to endure?  I am a blinkered mess. I look like I function to others as I have…"
Feb 11
JenShep commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I feel the same way Linda. But, I've had so many experiences that make me pretty sure there is one. I'm afraid to have wasted all of this suffering for nothing. If there is an afterlife/reincarnation, to kill myself now will mean I'll…"
Feb 11
Joe Kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I think I'm going down hill and very hopeful that it won't be too long now."
Feb 11

Profile Information

About Me:
Grew up in crime, met my Creator who changed my life and gave me a perfect Queen and children
About my Loss:
My perfect wife lost her life giving life. Her uterus ruptured at 20 weeks and she passed away...

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Comment Wall (11 comments)

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At 2:26pm on August 19, 2017, Maxey said…
I think John has said everything I am feeling each day. I sometimes think during the day of how many of us are out there suffering through this pain. It has been almost two years for me, so, I guess, after three there is still no relief or hope in sight. I feel nothing, and for those who tell you are now free to do things; they are crazy. Why would I want to be free of my love who made all the things we did worthwhile, meaningful, and happy?
Everyone who had a love will someday lose them; it is inevitable. They will then, and only then, understand our thoughts and pain.
I do not wish it on anyone.
At 9:24pm on April 3, 2017, Jon-Paul Ackerman said…
The darkness has completely overtaken the love
At 3:07pm on August 18, 2016, Mel Royer said…

Elynn, I can relate to your situation as it parallels mine perfectly. First, I am sorry for our loss. I am aware there are no words that can take away the sting, the inconsolable pain of your loss. I lost my Nancy, April 29th of last year and am still and will for a long time be facing the hell of loneliness, the emptiness and the never ending longing for that person who defined you and was always there for you, your soul mate and best friend. That was Nancy.   Now, I too cannot drive and have a limited social network, again, apart from this grief site. I live exclusively on social security and can barely make that last, but I do. I wake up broken and go to sleep broken, spending the day lost and wandering through my empty house, more like a tomb than a home. We are all so vulnerable to to the world we must live in and on that day I do not wake up, I hope to wake up in the arms of my true love, my beautiful Nancy. I pray the same for you and everyone who must endure this cold empty life. May God watch over you and bless you and take care of yourself...Mel 

At 3:43pm on August 9, 2016, Elynn m said…

Anyone else  feeling lonely and depresxed?   I have trouble getting out if the house because I do not drive.   My husband used to go everywhere with me.   It's really lonely and depressing having to stay in the house all day (luckily my son is here daily).  Too hot to go outside (here in the desert ). Wish I had something to look forward to.

At 2:40am on June 16, 2016, Mary said…
Jon-Paul
My heart goes out to you. Your last comment is worrisome. I don't know what to say to help you other than pls find strength from the love of your lovely wife to keep going. Take care of yourself. Praying for comfort and peace for you and all others including myself.
At 9:39pm on June 9, 2016, Jon-Paul Ackerman said…
Hello all. I have been relentlessly seeking. Sorry to be away so long but I am very unhealthy and don't want to spread it. There is hope for you if you truly want it. I however do not. I find peace in the agony that grows deeper each day. With much understanding comes great suffering.
At 10:30pm on January 30, 2016, rachel_micele said…

Just want to say Jon-Paul I appreciate your recent posts. "I rendezvous with my Queen daily. I've never felt closer to Her". I found that absolutely beautiful. That is what I am aiming for with my love. It seems the only option to survive this nightmare. To "seek ruthlessly" - if you ever care to share what has been your journey I would be interested to hear.

At 7:27pm on January 13, 2016, Hilary Christene said…
You have been missed here
At 3:00pm on December 25, 2015, Hilary Christene said…

Sending you Christmas blessings Jon-Paul.

I imagine you are finding a way with your children, into your future. I hope for you.

This place you created here has a special healing quality to it. I know we all appreciate you, and when we see the name Jon-Paul Ackerman, we feel comforted.

At 12:10am on April 2, 2015, Tildyc said…
John-Paul- I want to thank you for creating this community. It's help me more then any counseling or medication or doctors could of ever have helped. This is one of the most difficult and painful times in anyones life. And to be able to communicate with other people who are experiencing the heartbreaking, life-changing, loss of a soulmate.... It's proving to be of sincere importance. So- thank you John-Paul.
 
 
 

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Latest Activity

Joe Kelly commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"St. Brigid, Sorry for your loss.  I too feel so alone, sad, empty and lost.  I lost my darling wife over two years ago and as time goes by, I get worse.  I wait for death to be reunited with her in her realm and the sooner the…"
8 hours ago
St. Brigid joined Jesse's Mom's group
10 hours ago
St. Brigid commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"I just finished up everything with my once in a lifetime's friends estate. I spent two and half months in TX, a thousand miles away from friends and family dealing with it. Now, paperwork filed away, estate lawyer paid, bills taken care, it and…"
10 hours ago
St. Brigid joined Katherine Ellis's group
Thumbnail

Losing Someone to Cancer

This is for anyone who has lost somone to cancer. I lost my adopted Mom to breast cancer some years ago. She was everything I could have asked for. She loved me because I was just me. She also loved my family and children as if they were her own.See More
11 hours ago
St. Brigid posted a status
"In despair.friend died on Dec 20th. Spent weeks in TX closing his estate. Back in MN and have finished with the estate. Now I am in despair."
11 hours ago
St. Brigid updated their profile
11 hours ago
St. Brigid is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
yesterday
bluebird and Mark Coz are now friends
Friday
Profile IconaRin Smith and Mark Coz joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Friday
dream moon JO B replied to dream moon JO B's discussion mad at god
"do not no how mad i am or mad i am but all ilness goin on in wolrd big c th c dises viris pepplee cnt luv or kiss luv 1s coz of it cnt sea my mom till god noze how long coz of rstict loc doon ruless "
Wednesday
dream moon JO B commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"hi evry 1 still hatee big c now hate ths evil viris we got now"
Wednesday
Rhonda Partin-Sharp commented on Julie Dolsey-Weiss's group Multiple Losses Group
"Hi.  I'm new to this group.  I've been on a group for losing my Mom and my Dad and there have been others I've lost that I never got in a group for.  My father-in-law passed away on March 14.  I'm sadder than…"
Wednesday
Rhonda Partin-Sharp joined Julie Dolsey-Weiss's group
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Multiple Losses Group

I am creating this site for the many of us who have suffered several losses. I lost my mom, dad, grandma(2nd mom), grandpa, my beloved dog and divorce.Many of us have lost more than one person or event.Come share!See More
Wednesday
Profile IconJessica lee kent and Kathlyn Powell joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Wednesday
Keifus Mathews left a comment for Mary Walker
"Sorry for your lost~"
Mar 23
Profile IconKeifus Mathews and Mary Walker joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Mar 23
John Braley is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Mar 22
jlbowling is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Mar 19
dream moon JO B replied to dream moon JO B's discussion mad at god
"do i need 2 be mad or not ?????????????????????????????????? yes/no"
Mar 17
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Joe, I was thinking the same thing take me and protect my family. I am hoping like you."
Mar 17

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