Oh hun- I'm sorry. I hope you have family or someone to help you. Snuggle ur babies. And If you think you need to, go see your doctor. You are carrying a lot of weight on your shoulders and don't be afraid to seek help. For yourself and your babies.
Anyshia, Give yourself time to grieve! You have so much going on! The grief from losing your husband, the fluctuating hormones from having that precious little bundle....I can't imagine how difficult it must be for you! Does your 7 year old have some friends that he plays with regularly? Maybe he could do a sleepover to give you some rest and make him feel like maybe life can be "normal". Be kind to yourself!
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"I thought celebrating my mom birthday would make it easier. It was fun to celebrate but I still feel the loss. Downs are not as bad as they use to be but I still have them around anniversaries dates."