I am so very sorry about your beloved daughter. I can’t imagine the extreme pain you must be feeling right now.
I don’t have all the answers, but if you would like to have a friend to travel this journey with,…"
"Sorry that I’ve been away from the forum for a bit.
How are you today? I’m tired some. We have older friends that are moving and we did yard work for them so they can sell their house. It’s more work than I expected. Where I…"
"Rebecca - I don’t know if I was imagining it or if I just can’t find it, but I thought I sent you a reply. I’ve been offline for a bit as I was helping a friend get to appointments out of town. I wanted to make sure I had enough…"
"Thanks for your message Frances. I just saw it. I appreciate your kind words. God bless you. I don’t post on this site likebI did when my mom first died. It’s still hard adjusting to her not being here. Her death has helped…"
"Awww- I’m sorry about that! It must make you feel really terrible that you can’t just take her home.
The same thing happened with my mom after her heart attack. She couldn’t just live by herself anymore. We had to empty her…"
"Thank you @bluebird, I appreciate your concern for my daughter.
I’m sorry this happens to you often.
I have been learning so much from reading the posts here. I realize I need to sit down and talk with my family about getting our…"
"Maybe we will continue to have distressing dreams. My daughter is now a teenager and she has ongoing health issues. My dreams now involve her health or her desire to move away. Ugh - it’s very hard. I wake up in a panic sometimes. "
"I’ve had nightmares before of a different kind. When my daughter was an infant and it seemed all I thought of was protecting her. I had constant nightmares about not keeping her safe.
My heart goes out to you. "
"Yes, I remember once my uncle went to visit my mom and she didn’t even realize it was her brother. When he left to go home, she asked who that man was.
I was terribly frightened of my mom being in a nursing facility after one of her…"
I’m so sorry about the loss of your wife. Even though you live a distance from family and friends, do you have any support or encouragement from them?
Your wife as brave to have a snake! I’m basically a chicken,…"
"I'm sorry it happened faster then expected for your mother. It must have been hard watching her go through that. It's great that you had that time with her as short as it was.
I never had siblings, I have a step sister but I didn't…"
"Awww - I know you will cherish that special time you had during the years he was healthier. Isn’t it odd that the things we hated don’t seem so bad when we realize it connected us to the ones we love?
I practically begged my mom to…"
Married with teenage daughter.I am the primary caregiver for my disabled husband. My dad died when I was about 12 yrs old from congestive heart failure and my mom in 2015 from dementia and congestive heart failure. Welcome others for mutual encouragement.
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Thanks for your message Frances. I just saw it. I appreciate your kind words. God bless you. I don’t post on this site likebI did when my mom first died. It’s still hard adjusting to her not being here. Her death has helped me to be a lot more sympathetic to others who are suffering, but I am certainly not the same person I was before she died.
I'm sorry it happened faster then expected for your mother. It must have been hard watching her go through that. It's great that you had that time with her as short as it was.
I never had siblings, I have a step sister but I didn't grow up with her. I wasn't close to my step mom actually for the longest time I hated her btt I do miss her too. My dad and I were very close I could talk to him about anything.
I wish I had more time with my grams she was 90 but she was so active, she still walked everyday. She loved to bake I wish J had baked more with her. When she went into the hospital she had to have a blood transfusion, I don't remember what had happened but she did have uteran cancer. She came home and was back to herself then she had a seizure and was back in the ER two weeks later now with a blood infection so she was bed ridden for weeks. Months later she passed and everyone had given up on her it was hard I watched her go from this amazingly strong women who was always smiling and reading and playing games to someone I didn't recognize. She stopped smiling, talking then she was gone. It was sudden we thought we had more time and the hardest thing is she died in the same hospital ward my dad died in, same nurses.
When my dad had a brain bleed he had to come live with me for what was supposed to be temporary when my step mom passed it became permanent. For 6 years he was fine, normal still working he delivered newspapers to stores. I used to go with him and help, I used to hate it because u had to be awake from 12am till 3am and now I miss it. For those 6 years he lived with me it was like I was finally getting to know my dad, he had left when I was 4 and we saw each other on weekends and camping. Then he had a spinal infection and at 68 told he had leukemia and was given 6 months. He spent those 6 months in the hospital so I could go to school, I am grateful for that time I had with him.
I get that, I hope one day I will see my family again. It's wierd that once my dad died it was like we no longer talked to his side of the family and same with my grams. When she died it felt like we lost my aunts and uncles as well because she was the glue that kept everyone together.
When my dad was in the hospital I would visit everyday and we would play best of 5 cribbage and sometimes have a beer. I miss that. I miss watching hockey and betting who would win the Stanley cup with him.
I miss playing yahtzee with my grams she was always so lucky. She could roll an inside straight everytime all she had to do was ask for it. She loved to bake its not the same in this house without smelling her baked goods and cooking. She also lived to read, so anytime I had a new book I would read it then she would read it mind u it only took her a couple days lol.
It's hard when family doesn't want to talk about someone we have lost but I guess we all deal with it differently. I'm sorry you don't have many memories of your father but it's good to remember your mother.
Thank you, my grandmother would go by her middle name Margaret so whenever anyone called her Francis it always through me off.
The other day I was talking to my step sister for the first time since my dad died and when she mentioned a small memory about dad it made me smile. It also made me really sad I miss him so much, I wish I would just call him and talk to him and ask him for advice.
Thank you for being here to remember and grieve with.
"I started to compose a blow by blow sequence of events of my loves illness and passing but it became too painful and couldn't continue. Here we share how we are feeling grieving our lost Loves. In reality, most of my underlying…"
I totally understand; I detest being around happy families, and especially happy couples. It's not that I want anything bad to happen to them, I definitely do not. It's just that they have what my beloved and I should still have,…"
"usually I find your comments really clear, Linda, so I don’t think it’s not being good with words, more that it’s hard to express these things in words. Actually I couldn’t follow what Joe said either, but it’s…"
"Hello M Adams
Joe explained in his post of how I feel. I am not good with words on explaining things but Joe you said it perfectly. I just want to thank everyone here for sharing their thoughts, as we are all in the same boat together."
"Speaking for myself, I identify with Linda. My Love left our world and I know it, and accept that she crossed over into another realm of existence and can't come back. I want her back and I live in HELL every day without her. …"
"Linda, not sure what you mean here when you say you can accept the loss of your husband but not being able to change it is your whole problem — do you mean not being able to change the fact of the loss, or not being able to change the way it…"
Like you mentioned in your post, there is no normal in my life. I just take each day as it comes and just wait for death. I can accept that Julian is gone but not being able to change it is my whole problem."
"Hi Haven't been writing recently as have had so much to organize in my life I just haven't had a moment and when I do I am so tired. So grateful to everyone else who continues to write though. I look here daily to read.…"
"They told me that Mom had a heart attack. It happened on the weekend. I had made her breakfast & she seemed fine. I am thankful she was at home & that I was with her, but it hurts so much knowing she is gone. I just…"
"I was with my mom when she passed and it was not sudden. I may have thought I was prepared. I wasn't. I tried to say and do all of the right things. Still, after her last breath, it was as though I hadn't prepared at all. I knew what to…"
"Thanks so much! It helps having others that understand. Some of my family is supportive & that helps. It helps just having someone listen that truly understands. I have one sibling, but he was never as close to my…"
"It's important to have people in your life who understand, even if they are on a message board like this, because sometimes you have to look far and wide to find someone to walk with you.
Sometimes I will call my mom's sister. She will…"
"Thank you, some days are better than others. I feel so for you. My Mom was the center of my world also. I lived with her & took care of her. I am so thankful that I could be there for her, but now I miss her so…"
"Three months is not very long. It is still very fresh for you. There will be a lot of triggers. Sometimes they will hit you out of the blue. Other times you know that one is coming, like if you have to drive by a familiar place. It's important…"