I am 39, a single Mom in Oregon. I work as an oncology nurse. I love cats, books and movies.
About my Loss:
I lost my Mom on August 30 2017. I moved her from her home town to mine one year ago, after multiple hospitalizations due to end-stage COPD. Mom retired from the hospital in 2014, and did not want to die there. We opted for Hospice. She lived longer than anyone expected her too, and I try to stay grateful for the time that we had. I learned how deep my love for her is, told her often and tried my best to show her also. I dont think that anything went unsaid. Still, I feel devastated by this loss. I've never lost anyone close before, and my Mom and my daughter mean the world to me. I do t have much other family. I am trying to stay present in each day, but the pain is overwhelming at times.
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Luisa, you are not alone in how you feel. Losing a mom is traumatic. So know that I am very sorry that you lost her as I have lost mine. You're feelings are very understandable. The first few weeks were horrible. I would not ever want to relive those very early days. Yet, my mom has been gone almost five months and I'm feeling the full impact of my loss. There are days when I can manage and then a flood of memories will assail me including the pain she endured when she was sick and dying and I feel overwhelmed by sorrow. I realize that I'll never eat dinner with her or call her on the phone to talk about some random thing that happened. It's too much at times.
So I completely understand how you're not as productive as you used to be. Coupled with the responsibilities you have as a single mom, I know you're probably feeling at your wit's end at times. But I'm glad you're finding some solace in the site. I'm actually attending a Grief Share support group being offered by my church staring this week, so I'm looking forward to that. It helps to talk to others who know what you're experiencing.
"Hello to all of you who are here for the same unimaginable reason as I am. I found this website last night after another night of going to bed where instead of sleep, pain sets in that I was able to escape from all day by being busy. Jess's…"
"Joe, I have seven tattoos one for each year Julian has been gone. It is my way of honoring him People make fun of me saying I am too old (71) to have them. Glad to hear I am not the only one still honoring their spouse after death."
"Wow..you suicide yourself there us no place for you in heaven. You will find yourself again and life will go on without your dearly departed. Learn to love yourself find what you like to do there has to something. Think of it like this he…"
"It is a tradgedy to lose a loved one. But it does get better. Not everyday will be the same some days burn to the core more than others. Find a hobby or volunteer or help someone basically find something to do to ease the monotony of the day. In…"
"Thank you Linda. It's beautiful for you to had done that. I have tattoo of our names in a heart. I wear two sets of our wedding bands on both pinkys and ring fingers. We're still married and always will be forever.…"
"Yes I still miss her terribly. I am still sad and angry. I was left with two boys ages 12 and 8 at that time. What kept me going was making sure they were provided for and raised well. I still have full on bawls when the…"
I am curious because I am within a week of being a widow of seven years how you are doing it allotter eight years? Today, and more often lately (lets say for about the past six months) I have become more angry and more hateful of having…"