Missing my Son or Daughter

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Missing my Son  or  Daughter

For all of us that are suffering the loss a son or daughter.

Members: 438
Latest Activity: Apr 30

Discussion Forum

Please share your Story = the Loss of your Son or Daughter 466 Replies

Started by Kar. Last reply by toni m dicarlo Jun 17, 2018.

STUPID things people say... " Vent Here " 182 Replies

Started by Kar. Last reply by Robert Matthews Mar 11, 2018.

Lost Faith 58 Replies

Started by cindy parrott. Last reply by Dennis C. Jun 27, 2015.

The HOW ARE YOU dreaded Question ???? How do you answer??? 49 Replies

Started by Kar. Last reply by Robert Matthews Mar 11, 2018.

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Comment by Jesse's Mom on April 30, 2019 at 7:28pm

Connie, thanks for the response. You are welcome to share some of these poems from this post. They are from Dee, a friend of mine, who shares her poetry from loss publicly.

https://forums.grieving.com/index.php?/topic/6290-grief-poems-writi...

Comment by Connie K on April 30, 2019 at 6:12pm

Hi Jesse's Mom, Just wanted to send you hugs and prayers. You explained it all so well. I am immersed in TCF newsletter - I am editor for our chapter - but pretty much produce the whole thing. It's tough to do it because of all the sad stories and triggers. But it has helped me to get that newsletter and know i wasn't alone and that there is a community locally for me if I need it. So I try to pay it forward. Not sure how many more years I will but for now I will keep on doing it. If anyone ever wants to submit a poem or writing that would be awesome. I find that it is here that I have done most of my real true feelings wriing. I actually copy and paste my blogs into a word document so I can refer to them easiiy. You all have been an invaluable support. Thank you and big hugs to everyone.

Comment by Jesse's Mom on April 30, 2019 at 5:06pm

Connie, thanks for sharing the sign from your son.

Theresa, totally agree with your post. 

Comment by Jesse's Mom on April 30, 2019 at 5:03pm

I am now 6.5 years since my son's passing. Some things have improved to a degree, but mostly I have learned to hide my true feelings much better. 

I have also learned to do the "split-brain" thing, where one half of my thought processes stay in the present just to function here on this planet, and the other half resides off somewhere else, always seeking my adult son and also my infant son. 

There really has not been a healing --  rather just learning how to deal with a wound that only partially heals over, at times that thin covering rips off. I have learned how to hide real fast...people still exhaust me.

I have been able to de-sensitive to certain "triggers" which is some progress. I have been able to return to work, though not at the rate I was once able to perform at.

My dreams remain vivid and I am alert in them, and I am always searching for him there...

I try and stay focused in the present as I have a daughter and a grandson  who is very dependent on me yet. My adult daughter still gets extreme panic attacks...

So perhaps that is some healing, but there are some days, it still hurts so damn bad -- and I am still living the nightmare.

Comment by Lynn Williams on February 20, 2019 at 1:03pm

Thinking of everyone here with love

Comment by Connie K on February 20, 2019 at 12:08pm

It's been so long since I've been here. Somehow I don't get notifications anymore. And from November til after y sin' birthday March 31 I just want to run away and disengage with the world. But I think of you all and send you love and prayers for this difficult journey. I know I should say encouraging things but after 6 long years I feel I am going backwards. But I will go on... "Onward ever forward on the walk of Life..."

Comment by Teresa D. on October 12, 2018 at 9:54pm

Judy sometimes I feel the same way...why do some who don't deserve to live get to while our kids didn't.  And sometimes when I hear others use that word, "miracle" it upsets me too.

Comment by Teresa D. on October 12, 2018 at 9:51pm

Connie forgive me if I screw this up but the line, "Don't cry for me, cause I live in eternity" runs through me head all the time.

Comment by Teresa D. on October 12, 2018 at 9:43pm

Connie what a beautiful gift!!!!! That was Daniel, letting you know he's there. 

Comment by Teresa D. on October 12, 2018 at 9:32pm

Ginger I left all my sons pictures right where they were I need to see them. 

 

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Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I would rather cry on the outside than on the inside. Crying on the outside is a release. I am really tired of being sad. I'm also tired of being scared. Life without my mom still seems like a scary proposition. All we can do is to continue to…"
19 minutes ago
Profile IconGeorge Makhniashvili and Amatullah joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Saturday
Brett Bowman replied to Lynn Fisher's discussion New here in the group I miss my Mom!
"You and I experienced something very similar. You are not an anonymous person who lost her mother. I just wish that I knew the words that would make it all better. I don't. I'm still trying to figure it out for myself. All I know is that…"
Saturday
Lynn Fisher replied to Lynn Fisher's discussion New here in the group I miss my Mom!
"Thank you so much for your kind words.  It means a lot to me that you would take the time to bring me some peace, which you have."
Friday
Sue Toler commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"So glad you have your daughter.  I was so close to my Dad & so many wonderful memories of time I spent with him.  It has been over four months since I lost my Mom.  I try to stay busy, but still have a lot of grief…"
Friday
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi All,  Hope everybody doing good. My daughter is growing up and keeps me busy but any day I sit and feel guilty of not serving my mother, I feel like crying. She should have enjoyed so much with her grand daughter but destiny had some other…"
Friday
Linda Engberg and M Adams are now friends
Friday
Linda Engberg commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"Hi M Adams, Thank you for your kindness. Each year on his birthday I plant a tree or bush in his memory. Yesterday I bought this plague for my garden."
Thursday
M Adams commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"Linda, hope your day is uplifted by beautiful memories of celebrations you shared with Julian.  Do you have any special ritual or observance for his birthday?  Acknowledging such days is challenging for me, yet I do want to honour them.…"
Thursday
Profile IconMichele Erickson, Pamela smitherman and Shorma joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Wednesday
Linda Engberg commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"Today is Julian's birthday. I miss him so much Thanks for your post Morgan. You put into words what I have a hard time expressing."
Wednesday
morgan commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"Michael,   Wish I had an answer to: "just how are we Widows and Widowers supposed to pick up the pieces. ? I am battling my emotions every day, the mood swings are awful.." I am not sure if I am really picking up the pieces.…"
Wednesday
Linda Engberg commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"JO, I read this each morning but it does not help. I just struggle through each day."
Jul 9
Michelle replied to Brett Bowman's discussion Are We Alone?
"I was in the exact situation. But I was the one who offered help. But everything I did was wrong to my sister. And I stopped because of that. Your post made me see her side of it. My mom died this year. My sister only cuses me out. She won't…"
Jul 9
M Adams commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"Michael, just wondered if you would ever be interested in something like a book club?  A friend of mine who is a widow joined one recently and getting together with people to talk about what they’ve all read seems to be helping her, not…"
Jul 8
dream moon JO B commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"yep linda senetty of prey  i get or a versee i herd it a funrell im in nxt room waitin for u or god willget room reddy fro u  to day had bit of wobllcry to day but neededd to cry "
Jul 8
Linda Engberg commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"Michael, After 7 years I still remain lost and I know I will be until my Husband and I are together once again. As in the Serenity Prayer, God can not grant me serenity to accept things I cannot change. I just try to live each day."
Jul 8
Michael Thompson commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
" I am at my wits end with loneliness.  Losing my wife in 2014 has taken away a certain confidence, and this happens to those left behind. Being married is much more than a ring, it is a friend, and companion, someone who knows you better…"
Jul 8
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
Jul 7
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"John So sorry about your Sister. I myself spent the 4th with my sweet dog Babie J. I prefer her company to humans. She does not judge me she just loves me for what I am.  I too believe that death does not do us part. We we love each other until…"
Jul 7

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