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Comment by adriana gonzalez on July 28, 2011 at 1:18pm

hi im 28 years old n i just lost my husband :( ....he passed away june 22 2011>.. he was the love of my life,we were together 15 years.. he was my everything i just cant believe this happend to us.. it hurts more because that day we had an arguement.. i never got to say goodbye... i just got the call at night telling me he had an accident.. i dont know how to live without him,i feel like a lost puppy... we have 2 kids.. my daughter is 10 n my son is 3... is really hard going thru this... please someone that have lost their husband tell me how u did it>>> im going crazy without him

Comment by Tiffany on July 25, 2011 at 7:31pm

I know how you feel i am 22 and a widow, i dont know how to be a widow either, my kids are two and three. nobody knows how i feel around me. they all say i understand but they dont unless they have been there. its hard to breath at times!

Comment by Semary Rose on July 22, 2011 at 1:59am

I have been on this website for a few months and did not see this group.  I am 38 and lost my husband suddenly to a massive heart attack.  Sometimes I feel like I am doing too well.  I dwell on finding him that terrible day, but I feel like I have been cheated of grieving appropriately due to having to move on with children so young and dependent.  I miss my big guy.  He kept me grounded.

Comment by Amy on July 19, 2011 at 7:23am

Stephanie, I am so sorry that you are now a member of a club that you would never ask to join.  Your pain is so raw right now.  Please take each day at a time and know that you are important.  You need to take care of yourself.  Seek out someone who you can take talk to and will listen.  The feelings of not wanting to go on and wanting to be with your husband are normal but you need to realize that you need to be here.  There is a plan for you in your new life and your new reality. (Next you will say,"I don't want a new life, I want my old one".)  We have all been where you are now.  Please find someone that you can talk to and if you need us know that all you have to do is reach out and we will be here for you. 

 

Comment by Stephanie Legge on July 18, 2011 at 9:01pm

Hello ladies My name is Stephanie I lost my husband three weeks ago and I don't want to go on.  I am so angry and sad.  He died suddenly of cardiac arrest and I miss him like I miss breathing.  I don't know what to do.  I am 40 years old and a widow...what the hell???  Everyone stumbles around me trying to say the right thing all I can do to avoid screaming is change the subject or continue in my self preserving fog.  I scream at GOD, I scream at my husband to come and take me...I just don't understand!!!!!!

Comment by becky j cecil on April 10, 2011 at 5:48pm

I see we are all having the same issues, thought my so called friends were insane. Our spouses died, we didn't divorce or choose to leave. My heart doesn't want someone else.

Comment by Gina M on April 10, 2011 at 5:22pm

I became a widow to cancer on 2/28/11 and am 53 years old....I desperately want to chat with other women in my situation but am not having much luck finding them.  If you can, please connect with me so we can share our experiences.  Thank you.....

Comment by Amy on April 6, 2011 at 6:57pm

I

agree with Trisha.  Feel free to tell people that you have no intention of looking for a man anytime soon.  You don't need to be set up with any of their friends, coworkers, neighbors, or cousins.  I also think that people say things without thinking.  This should not excuse their behavior but makes it easier to deal with the stupid comments when I am playing back, over and over, in my mind.  I work in the same field that my husband worked in for over 30 years.  I run into people all the time that knew my husband and tell me that someday I will find someone else.  At first, I didn't know what to say.  Now, having dealt with this for 7 months, I say something like, "Who says I want someone else?" or "What make you think I will ever be looking?"  Most people are taken aback by these comments.  Most get the point.  I am hoping that over time you are able to stand up to the well intentioned stupid people.  Take your time.  Please post when you feel that you need to, as we are all here to help you.  I felt worse 4 months after than I did 2 months after.  Take care of yourself and your daughter.  Do things at your own pace.  You don't owe an explanation to anyone.  Ever. 

Comment by Trisha Manning on April 6, 2011 at 9:25am

Barb...you are not alone in hearing the hurtful things. I tell people I don't need a man. I did quite well on my own before I met Mike, and can continue to do so now. The only bad part is knowing there will not be children. We lost a baby before Mike was diagnosed. So, I get to be an old maid someday. I also hate the "single" term and try to avoid it. I am married...and there was nothing in our vows that would indicate the contract has expired.

Comment by becky j cecil on March 23, 2011 at 8:12pm

my husband tods passed march 5th 2011, someone through the widow at me first the first time this past weekend, and my stomach dropped out.  Im 47, what do I do without him, and how do I face being alone.  people ask me questions that i just can't wrap my head around, about rings, and dating and expectations...my only expectation is to get up and go through the motions of living,,,anything else hssn't been considered

 

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