Dear Friends,

I have not posted in a very long time but it wasnt because I didnt need to be here. I think I was trying to convince myself that I just had to deal with things and go on. As an update my husband of 42 years died suddenly the morning of Aug 3, 2011. I think for most of the first year I was in shock and now everything is more than real. So many things have happened in the last year that some people dont live through in a lifetime. The latest thng that happened I think has thrown me back into depression. At the end of October during Super Storm Sandy I lost power and water for a week-I live in a rural area of Pennsylvania and we do lose power with storms. I had never been alone through one of the outages my husband was always with me. I did have our dog but during this period the dog stopped eating and rapidly went down hill. By the time I regained power and water I knew he had to be put down. I feel like every piece of the life I had is now gone and I just dont know how to go on. With the holidays coming I feel like I just cant face it. Just wonder if any of you are having these feelngs as time goes on. Love to all of you

Barbara

Views: 547

Replies to This Discussion

sory for yore loss barbara i get told get over it i got told its easy eay how????????????????? i dont no how its easy i got told by som 1 in the famly i shud of got over it the day my dad died i got told wen poele die i shud foget abot him i cant coz they r part of my life story i no evry 1 has a life story and each life story is difrent if its good or bad or sad my surgate uncle not my real uncle he died last moth i got told foget abot him his not yore real unlce but i caled him uncle bill he felt like a uncle iv begin to relize some people hav no human fealing at all in my own family all am i going to say its some 1 whos on a power trip 

Hi Barbara,

I am glad you came back to this site. I think many people come in and out of this site.  I know I have. I think it is because grief comes in stages.  And when we think we are doing better something comes up to remind us of our loved one that we lost. 

well you are not alone when you come to this page.  I know the holidays have passed I home you found a way to get through them.  At least they are over

Best to you

Renee

Barbara -

This is also my 2nd year. I thought it would get easier but everything others have said is true. The first year (10/2/2011) is all about the grief and numbness and the "firsts" and then, what!!?? Valentine's Day is tomorrow (our special day) and it's no fun alone! The kids were great over my birthday a couple days ago but Valentine's was always the best! My husband was So Romantic - flowers, candy, dinner, one year a dinner/dance at a fancy hotel here. I am so depressed! My supervisor lost her husband a few months ago and it seems she would be more understanding but she just piles the work on me like it's no big deal. I am a social worker and while it's my job to talk to ppl and help them deal with their problems, I find I am not really caring so much about that. I don't want to be around ppl or talk to them or hear about their "stuff." I have my own "stuff" and no one is helping me. I did see a counselor for a while but it's so expensive (she also lost her husband suddenly and is understanding). I just want to yell and scream and sometimes do - but I scare my cats! I'm sorry you have lost your dog, too. That must have been about the last straw for you! Not to mention the hurricane! I, too, have had to deal with things my husband just automatically took care of and now I am learning how to deal with things with out his advice. It's so hard! My son said it's been long enough and it's ok if I want to date. NOT! Being with another man does not even interest me at this point. I would rather be alone. I feel your pain, Barabara and others. We are not alone in this grief.

Barbara,

How are you doing. Sue

RSS

Latest Activity

Jennifer replied to Robin H's discussion Lost my Partner who wasn't my partner in the group Being the Other Woman/Other Man
"Welcome to the group.  I lost my partner on February 5th this year, so it's still pretty raw for me too.  Reading through your story really touched a chord with me.  Like you, I didn't think I would ever find a group like…"
May 1
Jennifer joined Cathy Richardson's group
Thumbnail

Being the Other Woman/Other Man

This is for anyone who has lost their lover to death and you were the other woman/other man in their life. We have to grieve in silence. I can't find any support groups and feel like I'm the only one going through this situationSee More
May 1
Jennifer and William Gardener are now friends
May 1
dream moon JO B commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"i miss mom so mush i do"
Apr 11
Susan E Marshall commented on Susan E Marshall's photo
Thumbnail

My husband

"Thanks, Rosie. (I have memory problems and forgot about this site. I'm just seeing this now. April 6th)"
Apr 6
Natasha updated their profile
Apr 5
Angie Rowland joined Rita-Cecile's group
Thumbnail

LESBIAN ..GAY 2 SPIRITED loss and grief

Anyone who has lost their gay partner..soon finds that there may be a few things that are different...such as sorting through things and feeling like an intruder because it is also family stuff etcSee More
Apr 3
Speed Weasel posted a blog post

Assumptions

An assumption is an unexamined belief: what is thought to be true without ever really realizing that we think in that way. For better or worse, understanding starts with entertaining the idea that something is true.  Truly profound thoughts generally come to light from the relaxation of these (flawed) assumptions.  This is where I find myself today...Perhaps, one of the more significant drivers to pushing down the loss and grief at the time of the accident, ignoring it and mindlessly walking…See More
Mar 13

© 2024   Created by Ninja.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service