David H
  • Male
  • Austin, TX
  • United States

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About Me:
Iam a 65 yr old male retired military work for private secuity.I have lived in austin tx since 1983 Iam married but recently lost my wife to medical problems
About my Loss:
I alowed the hospital to terminate my wifes life due to muliple problems due to breathing,heart ,future amputation of limps due to circulation problems,other problems due to blood pressure

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David H's Blog

35 years

Theirs alot to be said about moving on .My wife passed away May 26,2012 I was married 35 yrs.I was married to a very possessive domineering woman .she made the decisions in the family.We never had any kids a son on her side.She was mean and vindictive and would go into a rage over things I did or son did. Their was love between us. I never did learn to stand up for my rights or have a good strong personality. So I coped between drinking,and a lot of other behavior.She would kick me out and I… Continue

Posted on May 23, 2016 at 2:40pm — 2 Comments

here Iam

two years after my wife passed away

Its sat,thinking of making my vodka orange juice stronger. My emotional outlets have been through massages.So I have put off starting off on a life of my own.Of course a good massage therapist will fill in that void for a whole hour to an hour and a half and then it back to square one .I  have come to a point and its hard I realize I have to though it out and its hard. Things come to mind and I coming back here from a long absence  Did I…


Posted on September 20, 2014 at 10:14pm — 2 Comments

from what I have seen

Iam starting to come back here as scatter brained as Iam, I was gone for a while. Iam a widower truth be told. Its a long story ,your thinking long story about being a widower.? Ill try to explain it in another blog Iam working on.we went for 35r yrs she ran the show.We loved each but not in a hugging kissing way. What does that have to with it.?

 I carried on a desentsized sort of duties  as a husband , Iam  thinking now I was emotionally ill equiped to handle a realationship much…


Posted on October 21, 2013 at 10:26pm

A little help here

My wife passed away a year ago . My question is for those that have had someone close to you die,what have done with there clothes and belongings.Also I cann,t see any sense holding on to things that we accumulated in out 35 years of marriage.Who knows where I will be and since Iam without a wife in this case and 66 yrs old I know I shouldn,t hold on.Her ashes are in the house in a urn also.I figure I should put some things in a box and get rid of the rest of the items. So what anyone done…


Posted on June 15, 2013 at 7:50pm — 3 Comments

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At 7:18pm on January 5, 2013, Bern said…
At 10:32am on June 20, 2012, Mark said…

Hello David,  I'm not quite sure I really understand your comments on my blog.  We all take different journeys in live and see it through a different prism.  You'd have to know my complete very private story to understand when I read comments like "you did what you did "  it's actually an insult.  Or the suggestion that I'd never thought my loved one would die.  Of course you know some day either they will go or you will go and in my case from as early as 4 I was ubber aware that my mother could be taken at any moment given her condition.  Not exactly another great reality for a child who is suppose to be dreaming about being batman and santa claus.  Yes I hold God responsible for the horror we endured at the end of her life.  Faith in God gave her hope through all the decades of physical misery and pain.  Again not knowing a persons complete private journey I will say her death from Cancer has so shocked our entire community there are those who have stopped going to church because they were so sickened by how something who had already been through so much hell had to endure that as well.  On the flip side what you said about God and you almost getting DWI's I can't answer that for you.  Some of your comments didn't really make sense to me and came off almost bitter.  What I would like to say to you and it's something I noticed you didn't include with me... I truly am sorry for your loss.  I know that empty feeling.  However, try hard not to take it out on others. 

At 8:08am on June 19, 2012, Sue Waxman said…


You seem to have a lot of guilt. I look back and queston if I was the best daughter I could have been to my mother. She was all I had in this world and I lost her to cancer June 26, 2011. At times I would get so angry with her because she was kind of stubborn, set in her ways and rather a hermitt. She smoked like a fiend in the 60's,70's and quit in the 90's. I would beg her to stop and she would say "I love my cigaretts and everyone has to die of something". And in the end after not smoking for 30 years - she got throat cance, emphezema and COPD. I was so angry with her because she did not listen to me. My biggest, darkest fear came true. As a child (I'm 56 now) I would blow out my birthday candles asking for her to quit smoking. Some childhood I had. Worrying about my mother caused to severe colitis at age 12. I never had children because I was so damn tired of worrying. In the end I grew to love her and respect her so much more. She was a fighter. I miss her so much David. All of us have regrets. Did this help? Sue


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