35 years

Theirs alot to be said about moving on .My wife passed away May 26,2012 I was married 35 yrs.I was married to a very possessive domineering woman .she made the decisions in the family.We never had any kids a son on her side.She was mean and vindictive and would go into a rage over things I did or son did. Their was love between us. I never did learn to stand up for my rights or have a good strong personality. So I coped between drinking,and a lot of other behavior.She would kick me out and I would develop all sorts of methods to cope.

I adopted a cat from the animal shelter I love that cat.

I have developed one way to beat back depression by laying down in bed and napping when possible.I have a sensitivity to people dying. You hear about people dying all the time . So I have thought to live each day to the fullest.Life is short.

Iam not happy. I would like to tell my therapist to screw himself. Iam bitter I have two companions come over,$19.30 an hr So I try. I pay alot for these things including massage therapy. So life goes on .Today I have gone to a senior center. Whoopee!!
Where Iam typing this. I find when I pull my head out of ass and do things ,move ahead things improve somewhat. Iam haunted by my inner voice telling to go to the gym SCREW! the gym Iam trying to get in the habit.


David

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Tags: burdens, life, s

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Comment by dream moon JO B on May 29, 2016 at 12:02pm

cats is grt david thy r thy dnt hav a go it us we we morn loss we v had or multi loss in my cas u cud say 

Comment by Chum on May 25, 2016 at 9:32pm

HI David

Adopting a cat is great.  We have always had dogs and now birds as well.  I don't know what I would have done this past year since my husband died had I not had the family of animals.  Unfortunately, Jordan's dog Beau died last Thursday.  He was a beautiful dog in looks and in nature.  He chose Jordan 14 years ago by jumping up on the couch at the breeders and never left his side until Jordand died last June.  The nurses even let Beau up on the bed on Jordan's last day to say goodby.  I was just starting to feel not too bad with the grieving thinkg but Beaus death has pulled the rug from under me and I'm back to noty doing so well.  I hope it is temporary.

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