I would like to know if I am the only one on this site who uses alcoholic to cope with spouse's death.

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yes 

belve me its not ansres its not 

Jo, You are right, it just makes you feel worse.

I don't Linda, but sometimes I wish I did.  I was never a big drinker (glass of wine) until hot flashes in my 50's got so bad I quit the wine,  thinking it would help.  Just never went back.  That was before the death of my husband.  

I think the crying is my chosen relief valve.  Although that has wreaked havoc on my body and I guess I'm thinking better that so I die quicker.  Lately I've been getting some freaky heart palpitations periodically that I've never felt before so I guess I keep hoping that the normal grief without using anything will do me in.  

Morgan,

Thanks for your thoughts, I keep trying different things. I am trying meditation and I joined a group called Center for Spiritual Living, it has really help me cope with everyday life.

I haven't, but that's not from any moral high ground or anything, it's just because I don't much like alcohol. 

I do have to take a couple of Benadryl every night in order to sleep, though, and have done every night since my husband died (except for the first couple of weeks after he died, and on the really bad nights since, when I have to take sleeping pills instead).

No, you're not the only one. I drink every day to numb it. Sometimes it helps, sometimes it makes things worse. I only wish I didn't drink as much as I do because of all of the calories lol. If it kills me, that'd be great. I just don't want to get fat haha. I don't drink irresponsibly like during the day at work or if I have to drive or anything like that. But, if I'm at home and I start to get really sad I think "oh! I'll have a cocktail!" and one turns to two or three...

JenShep,

I only have a glass of wine when my grief feels like it is going to sallow me up.

Same here JenShep.

Yes; I do. I lost my mom December 31, 2017, due to cancer. I have a cocktail every day. I never get drunk. It seems to soothe me

Kimberly

SAME HERE

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Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Joe, I understand what you mean.  There will never be anymore of what we did together, IT IS FINISHED."
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Joe Kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
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Joe Kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Yes Elynn, the loneliness.  That's painful.  They're not here and always was.  Our best friend, lover, and most precious thing we had.  We were lucky enough to spend the last 8 1/2 years together, joined at the…"
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Elynn m commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I've had a rough few weeks.   August 31st would have been our 45th wedding anniversary.   September 27 was year 4 of my husband's passing.   It's pretty lonely around here.  Its difficult to talk…"
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Joe Kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Every day for me is the same day she passed.  Not a joyful or even an ok moment.  I spend a little time with the children and grands and do my best to hide my emotions, but they all know how I am inside, even the youngest grand at age 4…"
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Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
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Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
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morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
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If you have lost a loved one to alcohol, substance abuse or suicide please share your story or feelings here. Share the love and beauty of the one you lost. Losing someone any of these ways is not natural and can be hard to understand and ask why? I lost my Mother to an overdose 9 years ago. She also suffered from major depression. Her doctor got her hooked on pain medication and she was addicted most of my life. These doctors who were suppose to help her ended up killing her in the end. I also…See More
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