Ok that´s odd. I have 3 fractured ribs. My drs and I had a hard time to grap the motive, a simple fall from my own height for a medicine peak of low blood pressure. What is even more amazing is how the people around us react when we don´t know what´s wrong but know there is suffering and pain. You know the type....the types of people who think she must be exagerating, or pitiful for a second or regretting their own attitude. What does it say about them? I think that´s why we feel like wild animals hiding in the cage to lick the wounds by ourselves so nobody else comes dumping their usual crap on top of what´s aready crap. Yes, indeed. Human race is quite something else, isn´t it? Just the day before I knew for a fact what was wrong with this much pain, my sister was all over my face here trying to take my car for a joy ride. Trying all her ususl bulshit and my father buying it beautifully. But life and God has it´s own ironic ways to get back and didn´t take long at all. While my dad and I were trying to have a peaceful coffee, she was jumping in the conversations like there is no tomorrow thinking she could push all my buttons to give her my car. Probem is been there done that, I let her use all she wanted my previous vehicle which was way cheaper mantainance than this and I remember all too well where the bills to fix went...to me in bedrest while NOT DRIVING at all. So I LEARNED. Now the car is bedrest with me and that´s it. My father and I tried to dismiss her conversations and she was all over the place lie a 5 yr old wanting candy. ABUSIVE. It´s hard t believe she is 4 years older than me and 20 yrs less mature. People are crazy. Offering money to take care of my mother calling it OPPORTUNITY holy macarony of crap. I am the one who gave her the turn with all the obligations and access to resources. And now she wants to play me, holy crap. Anyway god is ironic and that´s where I was at...because the day after this shitty dance of hers around both myself and my dad, we are both in bedrest and now she has to take care of HER BUSINESS, of my mother, and whatever we want her to do. The funny thing with materialistic people is that they soon show how much crap they are as soon as more responsibility comes their way, Meaning, they want all the money they can get and leave us sick to die on the middle of the street. And all I can think is that is exactly what she is aiming for HERSELF. Because God is like that...whatever we wish others come our way first and last forever. Because no one will want to help her and they will charge more and more to put up with her crap until a day she has the exact same faith as my mother did. A LALAND of all money can buy but not a single person that can put up with what they see in there and how they have been treated all along. I remember helping my mother I had to come up with a reason on the very basics for keeping my motivation...she GAVE ME LIFE. But that was it. There wasn´t any relationship from her to me that wasn´t absentor abusive or just crap trying to screw whatever I had going in my life. So, I look at my sister and I want to SHAKE her out of that MISERY road but she is loving the drive so much that she is blind and death and playing this PRETTY PICTURE we just can´t buy for a second. I wonder if fake people can understand the concet people arent that stupid or greedy to cave in to join. But all in all we the see the hle digging and just stay far and through a few punches when she comes on a close range to put her off for longer. But te irony is that she came from another city to play all of us...and now we are all sick and half patient and she is getting what she advertises for ...this great care for mother expanding outwards and we kick her butt and leave her to mother who is already not too happy with this pathetic play, but well what[s to say? Not happy for broken ribs but the  time away I can get from that for family crap is the BONUS side of it. THat´s sad, that we see a bnus in being sick is for the sick minds you know. Of course I´d rather be all HEALTHY and full energy to KICK HER ASS and show tough love. But all in all, would that matter to show anyhting for the blind? Sight...give it to the universe and god and that´s it. DOING ME now. Just slow down and a day ata  time. All in all what this TAUGHT ME is to put my agenda where it should be...FIRST and more important than kissing ass or kicking ass. Let the crazy find crazy esewhere... you know....in time everybdy finds what they are looking for in the depths of teir minds...good or bad. So there universe, do your thing. I am in vacations from the word to HEAL. THat will do and wish all well because karma is a bitch...lol

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I miss my Mom!

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