It's on the 19th and I don't know what to do with myself! I was always guarenteed to spend the day with her. When I was in school, she would let me stay out and she would take off from work. We would go out to eat and then shopping for a bit. When I graduated from High School, it still continued, she took off from work and we would go out to eat then to the tattoo place. I never imagined that last year would be my last birthday with her! I'm contemplating on admitting myself into the hospital for a few days because I'm absolutely terrified of my thoughts! If I don't go in, anybody got any tips on how to handle one of the most important 'firsts' without a loved one?

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Comment by Jennifer Blackwood on October 9, 2012 at 8:16pm

Wow, it is still fresh, isn't it! I wish I could tell you from experience that it gets better, but unfortuantly for me, it doesn't! My therapist said once you hit the one year mark, it starts to ease up a bit but of course it's different with each person!

Comment by Kristie Jo on October 7, 2012 at 10:50pm

Thank you, Jennifer. It's only been since July 28th for me, still so fresh and scary. 

Comment by Jennifer Blackwood on October 7, 2012 at 10:45pm

I thought that with it being close to nine months, it would get a little easier but it doesn't for me! Thank you, and the same goes to you! Sending many thoughts and prayers your way!!!

Comment by Kristie Jo on October 7, 2012 at 10:39pm

I ball my eyes out too -- I am right now sitting here typing this.  I agree with you, it does suck! I wish you the best throught it all.  

Comment by Jennifer Blackwood on October 7, 2012 at 10:33pm

Kristie, It's ok, I totally understand! I haven't gotten to the point where memories make me smile yet, everytime I think about them, I ball my eyes out like a little kid! It sucks!:/ I'm so sorry that you are going through it too!!!

Comment by Kristie Jo on October 7, 2012 at 10:22pm

I wish I could give you advice, but I'm seeking some for myself. Just try to remember all of the good times, and maybe try to make new memories too. Do something that you liked to to together in memory of her? Again, I'm sorry, I'm going through the same thing.

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