Jennifer Blackwood
  • Female
  • Hartselle, AL
  • United States
Share

Jennifer Blackwood's Friends

  • Emily
  • Angie
  • Tiffany M Kiser
  • Ashley
  • Johnny DAnte B.
  • Jodi Holler Underhill
  • Jayne
  • Tess M. DeCuypere
  • Samantha Machal
  • JL
  • Ariel Van Kirk
  • chasity carter
  • Brette Stinson
  • Kathryn Eldridge
  • Tammy B.

Jennifer Blackwood's Groups

Gifts Received

Gift

Jennifer Blackwood has not received any gifts yet

Give a Gift

 

Jennifer Blackwood's Page

Profile Information

About Me:
I'm 22 years old living in Alabama.
About my Loss:
Lost my mom this year on January 27th due to Pancreatic Cancer. She was 46 years old.

Jennifer Blackwood's Photos

  • Add Photos
  • View All

Jennifer Blackwood's Videos

  • Add Videos
  • View All

Jennifer Blackwood's Blog

It's still so hard to believe

That my Mom has been gone for 1 year, and 23 days. I never imagined that I would lose my Mom at such a young age..well even though I'm 23, I consider that young because I don't feel my age at all! I feel like a little girl without my Mom. Of course I've always felt young since I didn't have much of a childhood and my innocence was taken away from me, but since she has been gone, it has gotten worse! During the day, I seem to do ok, since I'm around Step-Dad's family, but during the night,…

Continue

Posted on February 20, 2013 at 11:21pm — 4 Comments

I want to feel 'alive' again!

I can't believe that on January 27th, my beautiful mother will have been gone a year! It seems like forever ago since I saw and spoken with her, yet it feels like it just happened! I have been completely numb and dead inside in 2012 and been in a total fog..when will I ever feel alive again? I know I will never be over her but I want acceptance & forgiveness of myself and I don't know how to achieve that!

Posted on December 31, 2012 at 2:32am — 4 Comments

Mixed emotions

I contacted a Medium the other day through email. He only wanted the whole name and nothing more, and he gave me so much information and helped me somewhat with 'closure.' What has kept me back, is I didn't know if mom forgave me for the things that I did, and I didn't know if she knew that I loved her! She forgives me and knows that I loved her regardless of the big 'ups and downs' that we had and told me not to beat myself up for the past, we make mistakes and learn from them! I know it…

Continue

Posted on November 1, 2012 at 4:16pm — 2 Comments

Depression, Anger, and Confusion!

I don't know if it's normal to be stuck in different stages of grief at the same time or not, but for me, it has been going on for awhile now! I miss my mom so much it hurt, and I'm angry at myself plus the doctors for not doing anything about it! I luckily have never been mad at God, I sometimes get mad that the only person I truly had, was taken away from me but to be directly mad at him, I haven't! There has been talk between some of Mom's 'friends' and all they could talk about, was that…

Continue

Posted on October 23, 2012 at 10:46pm

Comment Wall (12 comments)

You need to be a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community to add comments!

Join Online Grief Support - A Social Community

At 3:09pm on September 26, 2014, Corinne Gibson said…

Jennifer, 

Thank you for taking interest in our research. We most definitely have questions to ask you. Our research process is two-fold, we start off with a questionnaire and move forward with a phone interview. If you are comfortable and still interested in, please email me at cgibso10@slu.edu so we can get started with a background questionnaire? 

Best,

Corinne Gibson

At 1:17pm on September 15, 2014, Corinne Gibson said…

Hi Jennifer,

I have read a little about the loss of your mom from your profile, but I was wondering if you would be interested in sharing a little more of your story with me. I am part of a research team at Saint Louis University that is looking at end of life decision making and family communication. If you are interested in taking part in an interview, please let me know. 

Best,

Corinne Gibson

At 10:36pm on August 23, 2013, Eliza said…
Hi Jennifer,

I am so very saddened and sorry to learn that you lost your mom to pancreatic cancer. I lost my mom, too, to PC in December. What a horrible, wretched, and swift disease. I hope your mother wasn't in great pain. I noticed that you mentioned on the Mom group that you have bipoloar and PTSD. I have struggled with depression and my mood plummeted after my mom's death. I went on medication and it helped tremendously. Just wanted to mention that as it helped me cope in the initial stages following my mom's death. Feel free to message me anytime. Sending you hugs.
At 9:34pm on November 25, 2012, Tammy B. said…

Hey Jennifer, it's good to hear from you.  I think you're right, it's going to take awhile and everyone grieves differently. I can't imagine how I would have felt at your age.  I'm 53 (older than your mom was) and I know I was devastated when my mom passed away. I actually went into shock the first copule of months.  She had me when she was only 17 (almost 18), so I always took it for granted that we would be in the nursing home together because there wasn't that big of difference in our ages. ha!  I guess I was in denial or something because I never imagined I'd be without her in life.   I'm so sorry Thanksgiving was so bad for you.  It is an awful time, but it's something you have to go through to get better.  I think the first holidays are the pits.  Try to surround yourself with close friends when you can.  If you're like me, you prefer to be alone because you're so sad, but whenever I did go out with a friend I usually felt better--One day at a time.  My mom passed away in August of 2011, so I'm doing a bit better now.  However, I had to read a bunch of books on grief and life after death to come to terms with the grief.  It's funny, but I got so into the Long Island Medium and I have to say she helped me the most because I really do feel like they're always with us in spirit.  (and I typically don't believe in that sort of thing--who knew?!  Take care for now!  Remember, we're always here if you need someone to talk too

At 11:55pm on November 4, 2012, Tammy B. said…

Hi Jennifer,

Thank-you for befriending me.  I'm not sure if I ever got back with you.  I quit visiting this site for awhile because I was out of town so much.  You know, your mom was a lot like my mom-- so gorgeous and vibrant!  My mom was like that right up until the time she passed away. Oh, she got really sick a few years before she passed away, but she always stayed as fiesty as ever.  I wouldn't worry so much about your family.  I think it's just going to be a little crazy for awhile.  I lost my mom a little over a year ago and my family acted up too.  I think it's such an emotional, stressful time that people just act out their feelings in hurtful, crazy ways.  They sort of settle down after awhile.  Their worlds have crashed because someone very special is no longer there.  At least mine did.  It also bugged me that no one wanted to talk about my mom much after she died.  It was like they were afraid too or something and I really needed to talk about it.  It's like I told Brette, I really feel for you all most because you're only in your 20's and that's a time when I got the closest to my mom and needed her most.  It really breaks my heart.  However, I also think it makes you a strong and better person and you'll meet someone special and have a family of your very own one day and your mom will always be right there with you in your heart!  I know my mom does....Anyway, take care and thank-you for sharing your mom with us!  Much love and peace to you, your friend Tammy     

At 12:39am on September 17, 2012, Jayne said…

Hi Jennifer, the pics of your mom are beautiful! I don;t know if I mentioned but my mom too had Pancreatic Cancer.

At 8:55pm on September 12, 2012, chasity carter said…

Hey, three months before my mom passed away on April 07, 2012 I found out the man I called dad for my 20 years of life, wasn't my real dad. Out of 4 kids, I am the only one with a different dad. What made it worse was my biological father committed suicide in 2009. For three months I didn't talk to my mother, the day I went to go see her and say sorry, she collapses in front of me before I can say anything. She was in ICU for 3 days and the doctor said she was brain dead, we let her go in the 7th. My dad and I stayed in the room as they took her off life support....I wish to this day I didn't stay in that room! My last memory of my mom is her dying. I have trouble remembering any other memory other than that day. I feel all alone and miss her so much.

At 3:33am on September 8, 2012, Brette Stinson said…

I am doing fairly well for the  situation. Thanks for asking, I hope everything  is going well with you and your new home and all I can really say is stay strong. And I am always here whenever you want to talk, vent or chat.

At 8:03am on September 6, 2012, Brette Stinson said…

Jennifer,

What a beautiful picture of you and your mother. If you dont mind me asking, How old are you? You Look so young!  I am with you in this struggle and know exactly how you feel. I hope that you have a wonderful day.

At 6:36pm on September 2, 2012, Ariel Van Kirk said…

Hi there Jennifer! Thanks for friend requesting me.  It's so nice to meet someone my own age going through the same thing. I hope you are feeling well today :)

 
 
 

Latest Activity

dream moon JO B replied to dream moon JO B's discussion mad at god
"evry now agan i still loss my way i do"
Thursday
Kim Darichuk is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Wednesday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Today we Remember 9/11. I can't even imagine the terror and heartbreak the families must still have. Losing my Husband Julian under normal circumstances was bad enough.  God Bless all the people that still suffer from this horrible…"
Wednesday
Trina Mamoon commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Dear Morgan, Thanks so very much for your supportive letter. Sorry i didn't see it before. I replied to it just now, Sending you love and good wishes."
Tuesday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Thank you friends for sharing your thoughts. I don't know what I do, if I didn't have this place to come to. We are all suffering and the real world just doesn't understand what we are going through. I miss the tender touch of my…"
Tuesday
Joe Kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I have nothing that I want to or have to, to keep me busy except doing what I'm doing which has to have something to do with Her.  Like yesterday, I found a small  3/4 X 2 1/2 inch bottle with a cork when I went to the dollar store…"
Tuesday
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Trina, Check your inbox for a message from me. Joe,  So true.  That's exactly why I post here too.  I keep thinking if I get it off my chest and out into cyberspace at least I know I wont be suffering alone.  That consoles…"
Tuesday
Trina Mamoon commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hello All, I am sorry that I have not posted here for a while now to show my support for you. On August 4th it was the fifth anniversary of Joseph's passing. I just don't have the strength or energy anymore to keep pushing to survive each…"
Monday
Joe Kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I'm in the 19th month and don't know what to say, except that the only time I'm not living this horrible nightmare is when I sleep and don't dream at all.  Even when I post in a way to try to console anyone here, in a way,…"
Monday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Morgan, Once again I want to Thank You for sharing you thoughts with us. You put into words the things I don't know how to express."
Monday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Avi, I don't mean to be a downer, but I am not sure there is an end to our grief. I know mine is still going strong. I wish the good things in my life were as consistent as this is. We have to keep moving though. Keep taking baby steps. Assay…"
Sep 8
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"John T,   I saw your post late late last night.  I see you are still doing your best to cope. I remember a time that I wasn't even coping. I was barely standing.  After six years seven months I have become anesthetized.…"
Sep 8
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi All, Today I suddenly had grief all over the day. I miss my mother a lot and it seems that there is no end to this grief. Hope I meet her someday when I leave this world.  Just wanted to share my feelings here because people around me…"
Sep 8
Profile IconBev R, Kelly Darnell and Wil McGregor joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Sep 8
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"John, We are blessed to have this wonderful group to come to and share our grief."
Sep 8
Nancy commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Thinking of you John T.  I understand.  "
Sep 7
John T. replied to Elynn m's discussion Lonely again
"5 years since my wife died suddenly of heart failure right in front of me.  The time since that day has been just awful and when I reached this anniversary, I just couldn't believe it.  All I think about is all the years ahead without…"
Sep 7
John T. commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Yesterday was the 5th anniversary of the death of my wife.  I spent the day unable to believe it has been 5 years but somewhat surprised at how well I handled the day.  Today I have kept having outbursts of crying and overwhelming memories…"
Sep 7
Emmyk replied to Amy R's discussion So many questions in the group Being the Other Woman/Other Man
"That is horrific for you. Im so sorry. Just know yoy aren't alone. Know we dont think you are some kind of monster and know that we validate what you guys had and the love that existed there. Try not to fixate on the particulars that you have…"
Sep 4
Joe Kelly left a comment for Maria
"Maria, The only comfort I can possibly provide is that your mother and father are blissfully reunited eternally in spirit.  I lost my wife to cancer over 18 months ago.  We were together since age 16 and would had celebrated our 50th…"
Sep 3

© 2019   Created by Ninja.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service