Aaron Hoenig
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  • Independence, OR
  • United States
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bluebird commented on Aaron Hoenig's blog post Today
"There are many of us here who feel much as you do.  My husband was the only person I ever really dated, the only person I had a relationship with, the only person I made love with....he was and is my soulmate, the love of my life, and when he…"
Dec 30, 2017
Peggy left a comment for Aaron Hoenig
"I'm so very sorry for your loss Aaron.  I lost my husband to cancer as well.  He died in August 2015.  It's early days right now and I hope you are feeling well supported by your family and friends.  Should you ever…"
Dec 16, 2017
Aaron Hoenig left a comment for morgan
"Morgan, thank you for reaching out.  I am so sorry for your loss to.  I agree that no one can understand the loss of a spouse unless they too have experienced it first hand.  It is a unique loss like losing a child.  I feel after…"
Dec 6, 2017
morgan left a comment for Aaron Hoenig
"Aaron, Losing a spouse is horrendous.  Those of us who write here have experienced what I never realized was so prevalent before the internet.  The grief.  The pain.  I never could have understood there were this many people out…"
Dec 5, 2017
Aaron Hoenig posted a blog post

Today

I joined today to connect with people who may be feeling the same way I am..guilt, lost, alone, scared, angry, and moments of joy when I think about our life together.I recently lost my husband of 26 years,  He was the first and last man I dated and had a relationship with.  He was my best friend, my rock, my love and connection to life.  He showed me how to be strong and independent, but i am not sure I can be without him most of the time.Joining him is not an option!! I have too much of a…See More
Dec 5, 2017
Aaron Hoenig updated their profile
Dec 5, 2017
Aaron Hoenig is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Dec 5, 2017

Profile Information

About Me:
I lost my husband of 26 years to cancer on November 10th.
About my Loss:
It has been three weeks and I still feel it like it was yesterday. Larry had been fighting cancer for almost 20 months when he passed. It was less than a month from the diagnosis from metastasis outside the liver until his passing. He was at home as he wished and I would not give back the experience of being with him through the end and saying "I love you" and kissing him goodbye as he took his last breath.
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Aaron Hoenig's Blog

Today

I joined today to connect with people who may be feeling the same way I am..guilt, lost, alone, scared, angry, and moments of joy when I think about our life together.

I recently lost my husband of 26 years,  He was the first and last man I dated and had a relationship with.  He was my best friend, my rock, my love and connection to life.  He showed me how to be strong and independent, but i am not sure I can be without him most of the time.

Joining him is not an option!! I…

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Posted on December 5, 2017 at 4:55pm — 1 Comment

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At 3:45pm on December 16, 2017, Peggy said…

I'm so very sorry for your loss Aaron.  I lost my husband to cancer as well.  He died in August 2015.  It's early days right now and I hope you are feeling well supported by your family and friends.  Should you ever want to chat, please let me know.  it's been my experience that while you'll never get over the loss of your beloved spouse, partner and best friend, you can get through it.

At 10:49pm on December 5, 2017, morgan said…

Aaron,

Losing a spouse is horrendous.  Those of us who write here have experienced what I never realized was so prevalent before the internet.  The grief.  The pain.  I never could have understood there were this many people out there living life but dying inside day after day if it weren't for these kinds of sites online now.  

Its probably a good thing that you don't want to join him as there are many who don't have that stamina.  I wonder now more often than not why such stigma is attached to suicide when having experienced the kind of pain I have endured from losing my husband seems more understandable when now I have had the same kind of pain someone who commits suicide has.  I have made it this far (four years and 9 months) but the toll it has taken on my body is just a slow death rather than a quick one.  My immune system has ravaged me because I have found it near to impossible to stop remembering him.  And when I remember it pains me to know he is no longer here with me to enjoy life.  I want him back.  I want him beside me.  I don't want to walk alone and I don't want to walk with anyone else.  I want him to come and get me.  I ask him daily to do so. I must be very weak because I cannot get over his death.  I work, I try to sleep I try to eat but bottom line is I have not reconstructed my life other than trying to continue making a living so I can pay my bills.  But joy?  None.  Happiness? No.  Even nature doesn't really bring much more out of me other than an acknowledgment that I need it so I can barely function and avoid hustle, bustle, people and activity.  

Tonight I am on here rambling because I cant even form rational reasonable coherent conversation anymore without just exclaiming over and over how much I hate having to continue this charade.  I'm plain old tired of being an actress.  I want him to come and sweep me off my feet and remove me from this world.  

I can only hope you have a better chance at finding a way to live again. I sure didnt.  

 
 
 

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Teresa D. commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
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Teresa D. commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
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Teresa D. commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
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Teresa D. commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
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Saturday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Lia, a few lost minutes cannot compete with a lifetime of love that you shared with your mom."
Friday
Lia Lynch commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi there.  Brett, you were (are) totally right -- I was and think I still am in shock. There was so much to do, and with my kid to take care of, I wasn't processing. At all. Still not. I didn't get to say goodbye.  She was in a…"
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M Adams commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"As Brett suggests, you sure can be griefstricken without feelings of guilt -- for me guilt doesn't seem relevant to my deep sadness about losing my mother.  It's more a combination of loneliness, shock, emptiness, disappointment…"
Thursday
David is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Thursday
BLUEBELL commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Seems like we all have our regrets and sadness that we live with every day. But I have noticed for myself that though I still have them, they have softened over time. Bluebell On a different subject I want to celebrate this morning of being able to…"
Thursday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Brett, me too, the only guilt I have is if I did not stop at her house for three minutes, I would have been there, but I was not. I say it everyday why did I do that..."
Thursday
Virginia G posted a blog post

No reason to live

No happiness.  Nothing to look forward to.  Constant pain.  Memories everywhere and longing to be able to make more or even talk about them.  Scared, needing answers, anxious, lost, angry, devastated, guilt ridden.   how could life be so cruel?  It’s just not possible.See More
Thursday
Virginia G commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Avi, what is what’s app?  I don’t have a smart phone."
Thursday
Virginia G commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"The pain seems to get worse everyday.  I guess the numbness is starting to wear off.  I need God to listen to me.  I can’t live like this."
Thursday
M Adams posted a blog post

In black and white

Today I had to respond to several emails and repeatedly write down that my mother is dead. Finding it very hard to keep writing the words, so hard that it took several days of tearful effort to complete the three most pressing responses.  Finally got them done.  I just miss my mother so much.  I hate picking up the phone now because some part of me still expects her voice at the other end of the line. I feel wounded by family and friends who are grieving so differently from me, who are keen to…See More
Wednesday
M Adams left a comment for Daniella
"On the surface our situations could hardly be more different -- my mother just died, she was 84 years old and had numerous health problems the last five years -- but reading your words touched me, somehow I felt like they were my own, the…"
Wednesday

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