There is a part of being human that is perhaps more evident to who is more an INTROSPECTIVE person. The part in me that the REBEL takes charge and propulse CHANGE. It´s not visible to others necessarily. Because it is in such a deep level, that most don´t quite read right. Works like this. When a lot of people tell you things that are not remotely acceptable, you make a longer distance from them to you. And they wonder what´s wrong, and of course they wont point at themselves reading you wrong and putting their prejudice in the CARING about us context. Doesn´t work like that. This REBEL is quiet for self protection. To protect our minds from REACTIVE mode to DIGEST all and REACT in it´s own time. It´s that part of us that don´t use words to others, just REFUSE to ENGAGE in NEGATIVE dynamics of THOUGHTS and CONVERSATIONS coming our way. It´s that part of us that REFUSE to be INFERIOR to others. It´s not SUPERIOR either. It´s just applicable to SELF RESOLVING. It´s not for SALE, for BORROWING and much less to be SHAPED according to other people´s NEEDS or WANTS. THe resolve is quiet because the search is INWARDS. It´s rescuing files in the MIND that just BELONGS to the OWNER. It´s not to MENTION, much less to USE to explain SELF. It´s just that PARALLEL of what the EXTERIOR WORLD OFFERS, that echos in PARTS of BITS of where we were trying to make better CHOICES to the FUTURE. In fact, just to the PRESENT, because what works go into the FUTURE naturally. And what doesn´t...FREEZES IN TIME. And sometimes PEER PRESSURE is just a BIG FREEZER, a TRAP for the MIND. It does ASSUME so many things about us that aren´t TRUE, that freezes in time just having to EXPLAIN how wrong and all, and we need that ENERGY put into DEFFENDING SELF towards MOVING LIFE FORWARD. A STEP at a TIME. We are wounded from this BATTLE called LIFE. It should NEVER BE a BATTLE, because BATTLE COMES from OPPOSITION and COMPETITION, and we are UNIQUE and who would compete for that? And if you were ever ill or caretaker, you FULLY UNDERSTAND that no one stepped where you did, they haven´t seen what you saw. They havent CHOSEN to PRESS the button PAUSE in life to CARE for SELF or OTHERS, they work on a different SET OF MOTIVATION and in the PRIORITIES choices. To most LIFE resumes to the BATTLES they can WIN, whereas WINNING is about MONEY, RECOGNITION, and whatever their soul hunger all life long. To us that HAVE all THAT naturally, it´s about making priorities that aren´t justifiable by the MATERIAL and RICHES of this world. They are what we MUST DO in terms of letting changes in and out our lives according to MUCH DEEPER VALUES. And most never would SACRIFICE HALF or ONE QUARTER of their lives to deal with anything outside their BELLY BUTTON. They live in a MORE OR LESS of EVERYTHING TANGIBLE. They don´t understand the concepts of thoughts creating and shaping the LIFE WE SEE TANGIBLE. They are more of VICTIMS of EARNING MONEY, SEX, whatever... and the concept of time resumes to be BUSY EARNING A LIVING and justifying all else by CATHEGORIZING or CLASSIFYING them WRONG. Not that they remotely UNDERSTAND RIGHT, but self assuring others are WRONG will make them RIGHT by exclusion. These people are like BUGS around the light. They need to make our LIGHT shine less so their poor existence SHINES BRIGHTER. However when the COMPETITION is not there, we are not around at all, they are just quite POOR EXCUSE for HUMAN BEINGS. They are like virus or cancer, their existence just strives at the cost of stealing the precious energy ofLIFE from those WHO FULLY KNOW WHAT THEY ARE and WHERE THEY ARE. They want to doubt, make less, but they are NEVER HUMBLE. They aren´t able to walk next to ANYONE without taking ADVANTAGE in one way or another. In phsychology, it´s defined as LEVELLING, meaning, one that needs to put others down to feel BIGGER AND BETTER. When in reality they feel so SMALL DEEP inside that they must SHRINK all OTHERS to APPEAR BIGGER. They come in very VULNERABLE times, but they are quick to show HOW BIGGER AND BETTER THEY ARE AND how LUCKY we are to HAVE THEM. And we have that puzzled look thinking how the hell I came so far in life without ever having MET THAT CRAP? And the more we ACCEPT them around, the SMALLER WE FEEL, even if we can´t point at the specific PUT DOWN words in a sense. It just feels weird. And there is JUST one reasonable thing to do...WALK AWAY. And STAY AWAY. One day they may be tired to be alone and will grow out of the SUPERIOR type, but chances are they will show JUST ENOUGH IMPROVEMENT to have more peers walking longer to get what they need from them. Think that in a society that PRIMES that STEREOTYPE, and you learn VERY QUICKLY that walking alone and not exposing the THE MIND and THINKING PROCESS is WHAT IS BEST and necessary to move past this type and similars. There is something to be said for WHAT WE ATTRACT to walk with us. They are MIRRORS, and whatever we like ABOUT THEM, is sure what exactly needs to be improved in ourselves to GROW OUT THE NEED TO HAVE THEM. So, feeling NEEDY is a GREAT ASSET to make the list of NEEDS in SELF to be improved and CONQUERED. Most of that list gets really small and easy with distancing self from the craps of others. There is an INTERNAL CONVERSATION that comes after relaxing moments of SOLITUDE and we don´t have to actually PURSUE the quest MENTALLY. We relax and ALL COMES SO CLEAR that we can´t IGNORE. That is using WISELY the OUTER WORLD PRESSURE to RESOLVE conflicts or points that need to be worked on deep in OURSELVES. And without the relaxing and SOLITUDE, we NEVER HEAR OUR OWN VOICE. We would be forever fighting the PRESSURES off and the most we would AMOUNT to as an INDIVIDUAL would be defined or FENCED by the needs for DUMPING grounds of others. That is not LIVING, that is SURVIVAL in a very poor or LOW common DENOMINATOR. It will turn US into THEM over time. And we want to be much more a POSITIVE FORCE regardless of who comes and goes and by making the road a little LONGER to get in that CLOSE RANGE will continue to protect the BEAUTIFUL MINDS we all HAVE. We make no FAVOURS giving into the NEGATIVE ATTENTION DYNAMICS and sometimes time apart will bring others back in much better terms. And if they don´t come it´s alright, because what will define how long they DESERVE to be by our side is the QUALITY of INTERACTION. Whatever is POSITIVE stays, but NEGATIVE should go. And the HELL is full of GOOD INTENSIONS. But not full of good AGENDAS. Take a deeper look at the person and where they are going and how and where we are going, and will be clear that whatever they are able to attach is just part of the PUZZLE they hold, and some PUZZLES we don´t need to solve. In fact we need little to see the picture that may appear after finishing the puzzle there isn´t a good one and it isn´t worth the time, which would be best invested into figuring out the OWN PUZZLES. Take that back, the hands to FIX others and make them FEEL OK, to make SELF feel just great for we are all ALIVE AND WELL and being HAPPY doesn´t cost anything or need any PUZZLE. Just paying atttention to how we FEEL during and after people´s PRESENCE around us, and that INTERNAL COMPASS should be MORE THAN PLENTY to continue moving life FORWARD. Staying out of people trying their MIND GAMES is quite a useful memo here, whatever awareness they may have.

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Billy Jo Colt commented on Pamela philipp's blog post I need advice
"Hi Pamela, I can understand your situation as you aretorn between two worlds. Your daughter in her own way is trying to help you with your grieving process. She thinks that her way is the only way through your grief. It is also a confrontation you…"
47 minutes ago
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
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morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
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morgan commented on Pamela philipp's blog post I need advice
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Virginia G posted a discussion

What’s the point

Whats the point of living if there’s no happiness?  If you don’t care about anything except being with the person you lost...if everything is meaningless...if you can’t stand the pain or the numbness...if you don’t belong anywhere..if everything feels wrong...if you have no idea what to do about it...if you can’t get through the daySee More
9 hours ago
Virginia G commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
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Pamela philipp posted a blog post

I need advice

I have been very stressed and upset my daughter came back to my house for a while until she and her family gets on their feet which is not the problem the problem is she has made me get all the things that are important to me out of the house and put in the garage pictures mementos etc. because she thinks that I need to move on she said because it has been three years and she does not understand how she is upsetting me I don't want to be in this house like this anymore how do I make her…See More
14 hours ago
Denise Lavoie left a comment for Pamela philipp
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Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
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Virginia G commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
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Saturday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
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Saturday
Virginia G commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
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bluebird replied to Kristen Harlow's discussion Feeling alone
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Denise Lavoie commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
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Kristen Harlow replied to Kristen Harlow's discussion Feeling alone
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bluebird replied to Kristen Harlow's discussion Feeling alone
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Friday
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