There is a part of being human that is perhaps more evident to who is more an INTROSPECTIVE person. The part in me that the REBEL takes charge and propulse CHANGE. It´s not visible to others necessarily. Because it is in such a deep level, that most don´t quite read right. Works like this. When a lot of people tell you things that are not remotely acceptable, you make a longer distance from them to you. And they wonder what´s wrong, and of course they wont point at themselves reading you wrong and putting their prejudice in the CARING about us context. Doesn´t work like that. This REBEL is quiet for self protection. To protect our minds from REACTIVE mode to DIGEST all and REACT in it´s own time. It´s that part of us that don´t use words to others, just REFUSE to ENGAGE in NEGATIVE dynamics of THOUGHTS and CONVERSATIONS coming our way. It´s that part of us that REFUSE to be INFERIOR to others. It´s not SUPERIOR either. It´s just applicable to SELF RESOLVING. It´s not for SALE, for BORROWING and much less to be SHAPED according to other people´s NEEDS or WANTS. THe resolve is quiet because the search is INWARDS. It´s rescuing files in the MIND that just BELONGS to the OWNER. It´s not to MENTION, much less to USE to explain SELF. It´s just that PARALLEL of what the EXTERIOR WORLD OFFERS, that echos in PARTS of BITS of where we were trying to make better CHOICES to the FUTURE. In fact, just to the PRESENT, because what works go into the FUTURE naturally. And what doesn´t...FREEZES IN TIME. And sometimes PEER PRESSURE is just a BIG FREEZER, a TRAP for the MIND. It does ASSUME so many things about us that aren´t TRUE, that freezes in time just having to EXPLAIN how wrong and all, and we need that ENERGY put into DEFFENDING SELF towards MOVING LIFE FORWARD. A STEP at a TIME. We are wounded from this BATTLE called LIFE. It should NEVER BE a BATTLE, because BATTLE COMES from OPPOSITION and COMPETITION, and we are UNIQUE and who would compete for that? And if you were ever ill or caretaker, you FULLY UNDERSTAND that no one stepped where you did, they haven´t seen what you saw. They havent CHOSEN to PRESS the button PAUSE in life to CARE for SELF or OTHERS, they work on a different SET OF MOTIVATION and in the PRIORITIES choices. To most LIFE resumes to the BATTLES they can WIN, whereas WINNING is about MONEY, RECOGNITION, and whatever their soul hunger all life long. To us that HAVE all THAT naturally, it´s about making priorities that aren´t justifiable by the MATERIAL and RICHES of this world. They are what we MUST DO in terms of letting changes in and out our lives according to MUCH DEEPER VALUES. And most never would SACRIFICE HALF or ONE QUARTER of their lives to deal with anything outside their BELLY BUTTON. They live in a MORE OR LESS of EVERYTHING TANGIBLE. They don´t understand the concepts of thoughts creating and shaping the LIFE WE SEE TANGIBLE. They are more of VICTIMS of EARNING MONEY, SEX, whatever... and the concept of time resumes to be BUSY EARNING A LIVING and justifying all else by CATHEGORIZING or CLASSIFYING them WRONG. Not that they remotely UNDERSTAND RIGHT, but self assuring others are WRONG will make them RIGHT by exclusion. These people are like BUGS around the light. They need to make our LIGHT shine less so their poor existence SHINES BRIGHTER. However when the COMPETITION is not there, we are not around at all, they are just quite POOR EXCUSE for HUMAN BEINGS. They are like virus or cancer, their existence just strives at the cost of stealing the precious energy ofLIFE from those WHO FULLY KNOW WHAT THEY ARE and WHERE THEY ARE. They want to doubt, make less, but they are NEVER HUMBLE. They aren´t able to walk next to ANYONE without taking ADVANTAGE in one way or another. In phsychology, it´s defined as LEVELLING, meaning, one that needs to put others down to feel BIGGER AND BETTER. When in reality they feel so SMALL DEEP inside that they must SHRINK all OTHERS to APPEAR BIGGER. They come in very VULNERABLE times, but they are quick to show HOW BIGGER AND BETTER THEY ARE AND how LUCKY we are to HAVE THEM. And we have that puzzled look thinking how the hell I came so far in life without ever having MET THAT CRAP? And the more we ACCEPT them around, the SMALLER WE FEEL, even if we can´t point at the specific PUT DOWN words in a sense. It just feels weird. And there is JUST one reasonable thing to do...WALK AWAY. And STAY AWAY. One day they may be tired to be alone and will grow out of the SUPERIOR type, but chances are they will show JUST ENOUGH IMPROVEMENT to have more peers walking longer to get what they need from them. Think that in a society that PRIMES that STEREOTYPE, and you learn VERY QUICKLY that walking alone and not exposing the THE MIND and THINKING PROCESS is WHAT IS BEST and necessary to move past this type and similars. There is something to be said for WHAT WE ATTRACT to walk with us. They are MIRRORS, and whatever we like ABOUT THEM, is sure what exactly needs to be improved in ourselves to GROW OUT THE NEED TO HAVE THEM. So, feeling NEEDY is a GREAT ASSET to make the list of NEEDS in SELF to be improved and CONQUERED. Most of that list gets really small and easy with distancing self from the craps of others. There is an INTERNAL CONVERSATION that comes after relaxing moments of SOLITUDE and we don´t have to actually PURSUE the quest MENTALLY. We relax and ALL COMES SO CLEAR that we can´t IGNORE. That is using WISELY the OUTER WORLD PRESSURE to RESOLVE conflicts or points that need to be worked on deep in OURSELVES. And without the relaxing and SOLITUDE, we NEVER HEAR OUR OWN VOICE. We would be forever fighting the PRESSURES off and the most we would AMOUNT to as an INDIVIDUAL would be defined or FENCED by the needs for DUMPING grounds of others. That is not LIVING, that is SURVIVAL in a very poor or LOW common DENOMINATOR. It will turn US into THEM over time. And we want to be much more a POSITIVE FORCE regardless of who comes and goes and by making the road a little LONGER to get in that CLOSE RANGE will continue to protect the BEAUTIFUL MINDS we all HAVE. We make no FAVOURS giving into the NEGATIVE ATTENTION DYNAMICS and sometimes time apart will bring others back in much better terms. And if they don´t come it´s alright, because what will define how long they DESERVE to be by our side is the QUALITY of INTERACTION. Whatever is POSITIVE stays, but NEGATIVE should go. And the HELL is full of GOOD INTENSIONS. But not full of good AGENDAS. Take a deeper look at the person and where they are going and how and where we are going, and will be clear that whatever they are able to attach is just part of the PUZZLE they hold, and some PUZZLES we don´t need to solve. In fact we need little to see the picture that may appear after finishing the puzzle there isn´t a good one and it isn´t worth the time, which would be best invested into figuring out the OWN PUZZLES. Take that back, the hands to FIX others and make them FEEL OK, to make SELF feel just great for we are all ALIVE AND WELL and being HAPPY doesn´t cost anything or need any PUZZLE. Just paying atttention to how we FEEL during and after people´s PRESENCE around us, and that INTERNAL COMPASS should be MORE THAN PLENTY to continue moving life FORWARD. Staying out of people trying their MIND GAMES is quite a useful memo here, whatever awareness they may have.

Views: 35

Comment

You need to be a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community to add comments!

Join Online Grief Support - A Social Community

Groups

Latest Activity

Virginia G commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Brett, Bluebell,   thanks for the love and for caring.  I am still afraid of not knowing what happens to people that end their life.  I wouldnt want to ruin my only chance to be with her again.  Then again, wouldn’t a…"
1 hour ago
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Virginia, I thought about it but it was never a real possibility for me. As I said earlier, there is nothing in this world that would hurt my mom more than ending my own life. I will never do it. I try to be careful. I'm such a religious…"
18 hours ago
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Agree with you Virginia. Sometimes we actually dont know what we are doing."
20 hours ago
Mike H. posted a blog post

What Can Help Me if I'm Depressed?

The best help comes from “God, Who comforts and encourages and refreshes and cheers the depressed.”—2 Corinthians 7:6, The Amplified Bible.What God gives to help the depressedStrength. God “refreshes and cheers” you, not by removing all your problems, but by answering your prayers when you pray for the strength to cope. (…See More
21 hours ago
Virginia G commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Avi, Im sure you were giving your Mom the medicines that you thought were best at the time.  Did you ask the doctor if that one dose would have made a difference?  Sadly, it probably wouldn’t have. I had no idea there were only a few…"
yesterday
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Thanks bluebell. Yes I joined the group so that I can discuss by grief and get some good advices. Virginia, same thing happened with me as well. My mother oncologist was also not telling me complete details amd just use to say that only few days…"
yesterday
BLUEBELL commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Avi I am very sorry for your loss. I understand the sadness and guilt you are going through right now; all of us do. This is a good place to come and talk and share your feelings. You may not get an answer back right away sometimes, but there has…"
yesterday
Virginia G commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Avi,   welcome, people on here are very supportive.  I am going through the same guilt as far as what happened in the end.  In the hospital, I didn’t talk to the doctors enough, I don’t know what I was doing.  Now I…"
yesterday
BLUEBELL commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Virginia It sounds like you are in a very dark place. Before it gets too bad, I beg of you to reach out for help. Call 911 if you have to. Trust that you will feel better than you do now and you have to be alive to find that out. Bluebell"
yesterday
Virginia G commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"  As always, Brett thank you for your caring posts.  I think you could be a writer or counselor.  Thanks everyone else for support also.  I can’t offer any help because I dont know what to do.  I was thinking tonight,…"
yesterday
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi Guys This is Avi and I am from India. I lost my mother on 15 may after her 7 months battle with last stage gall bladder cancer.  The grief that I possess now is that although I was closely monitoring her treatment since the first day, I was…"
yesterday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Theresa, I feel like a hypocrite when I try to think of something to say to you that would bring you peace. Because I know that I would feel the same way you do if that had happened to me. There was something. Before my mom came home on Hospice, she…"
yesterday
Avi joined Karen's group
Thumbnail

I miss my Mom!

If you have that hole in your heart that you get when you lose the woman that you shared a body with....
yesterday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Brett Crystal and Bluebell are so right, I feel comfort and I smile when reading your posts.   I know I was trying to get to her, but I say maybe it was not meant for me to be there when her heart stopped, maybe she wanted that way, but…"
yesterday
Crystal K commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Brett you always bring light to our darkest thoughts. I am so thankful to know you. I wrill try to tell myself that from now on, that my mom would want me to live. "
yesterday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Virginia, I know that you don't want to wait until your old to be with your mom. Neither do I. I told you earlier that after my mom died I considered ending my own life, but I could just see my mom if I had tried, screaming, "NO!!" We…"
Friday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I wish I hadn't posted so quickly this morning. I had some type'o's. I meant to say that my mom held out her hand before she died. She was holding it upwards. It was an awesome thing to see, though at the time it didn't mean so…"
Friday
Virginia G commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Crystal, I read some of your posts, we have a lot in common.  I read you were also close to your Grandma and lost her and then your Mom and aren’t close to your Dad.  Same here.  My Mom was an only child too so my Granny, Mom,…"
Friday
Crystal K commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Virginia, reading your posts was like going through all my feelings of guilt the first few weeks after my mom died.  All the times I was horrible to her, the times I got frustrated when she wouldn't eat right or when I complained about…"
Thursday
BLUEBELL commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Brett, I love reading your posts even though they are for Virginia. They help me to0 Virginia, My thoughts and prayers are with you. I pray that you find some peaceful moments. It is okay to find some peace. It does not take away from how much you…"
Thursday

© 2018   Created by Jarvis.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service