Ordinary life...back to the BASICS. What are the basic needs? Shelter, food, health, and build a life allowing loving people around us. All else that does not construct or build to that, is a waste of ENERGY and TIME. When one is hurting, they tend to relate to others on the same level. Meaning they are choosing to enter and build others up or whatever they think is good, not realizing that is just temporary relief. Because realistically speaking no one can stop each other hurt because the pain belongs to the owner ONLY, and thus will stay probably before and after we give this person a bandaid. Kind words are lovely and of course its beneficial to pour out in a healthy manner the hurt in the best ways we can express. But not all peers are KIND in return. In fact human nature is to deny after a little healing the role that another had trying to help. By doing that, we cross a fine line where we start belonging to their hurt instead having a 2 way exchange between what hurts one and the other. That´s why I think support groups and writing does so much good, besides talking here and then to friends. Not relying much at all in one thus the hurt can´t be used for anyone´s particular agenda. Sometimes aquaintance are ok to hear bits and pieces of our story, but not one single person have the entire story per say, so we are not used or abused in the name of trust by making a single individual a place of all hopes. For that, we have to realize most people will interact on the ordinary level, and most hurt healing is a deep inwards curve, a path we MUST master to walk alone the best we can making forst KIND to OUR SOUL FIRST. Living free of the drama level of interaction, meaning enduring our own hurt mostly inwards makes for an ordinary life type of exchange which is that INDEED most people will ever deserve to know.

Views: 27

Comment

You need to be a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community to add comments!

Join Online Grief Support - A Social Community

Latest Activity

Peggy left a comment for Aaron Hoenig
"I'm so very sorry for your loss Aaron.  I lost my husband to cancer as well.  He died in August 2015.  It's early days right now and I hope you are feeling well supported by your family and friends.  Should you ever…"
2 hours ago
Alice Thompson left a comment for nat
"Dear Nat, I’m so very sorry you had to lose your beloved husband. I wish you strength and comfort as you make your way through these early days and nights. There are many kind souls on this site who know about deep pain, and I recommend…"
7 hours ago
Profile IconKar-Kate Leung, nat, Ambreen and 5 more joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
9 hours ago
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Bluebell, my thoughts and prayers are with you. My brother called me the other day and he said are you ok? There is a twenty year age difference between us, so we are not that close and he lives five hours away. I said to him, yes I though you would…"
12 hours ago
BLUEBELL commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Another bad day. I was shopping for Christmas cards and gift bags when without warning, I broke down in tears at the register. Thank goodness the cashier was a sensitive caring person and did not just blow me off. She said "Your Mom will always…"
14 hours ago
Stephanie Coyle joined Courtney Adams's group
Thumbnail

Suicide....Hard Knowing They did it By Their Choice

This is for some of us who have lost someone due to suicide...I miss you Annie!!!See More
22 hours ago
Alice Thompson commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Thank you, Linda and Morgan. It just hurts so much for all of us."
yesterday
bluebird commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"((((((morgan))))))"
yesterday
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Paul, Each of us have memories of a time and day of the death of our beloved.  Mine just happened to come at a time of the year when normally the excesses of celebrating kick into high gear.  Not better not worse than anyone else's…"
yesterday
Elynn m commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"My friend just lost her husband before Thanksgiving.   I'm trying to reach out to her, because I know how she feels, but she does not seem to want to respond.  She's keeping very busy!  I feel bad for her, but I guess…"
yesterday
Elynn m commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Thank you, Linda for posting that.   "
yesterday
Peggy left a comment for Dawn W
"Hi Dawn, I saw your posts and wanted to introduce myself.  I'm also in Canada, in Ontario.  I lost my husband suddenly in 2015.  He had cancer but had been given 3 to 5 years and was gone in 8 weeks.  If you'd like to…"
Thursday
kim posted a status
"my beautiful son, its x mas again, ill be with you soon I promise, I love you forever mom"
Thursday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Alice, I am so sorry, I know you holidays will never be the same again, we just make the best of it. "
Thursday
Alice Thompson commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I feel the same. My love had a comprehensive stroke on 22 December, and died in hospital at 10pm on New Years Eve. Then I went “home” in a taxi amid fireworks."
Thursday
Profile IconAnn Appa, Alison Eley, Hannah and 3 more joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Thursday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Morgan & Paul, I feel exactly like you do, I wish I could sleep the holidays away, I find no joy in them, it's just another day I am being tortured."
Thursday
Paul commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Morgan, As hard as it is for the rest of us to endure the upcoming holidays it must be at least doubly difficult for you given the circumstances your husband and you were dealt with.  To everyone here who has put up with this hell for multiple…"
Thursday
Maxey is now friends with Cheyenne Steffen and Pamela philipp
Thursday
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Paul,  In particular this time of the year everyone who hasn't lost their love is celebrating.  I used to be one of them. Then one day a long time ago, I took my sick husband to the hospital Xmas Eve day and found out the day after…"
Thursday

© 2017   Created by Jarvis.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service