"Welcome to the group. I lost my partner on February 5th this year, so it's still pretty raw for me too. Reading through your story really touched a chord with me. Like you, I didn't think I would ever find a group like…"
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Lisa - my heart was so moved by your post. I am so very sorry for the loss of your father, but please be assured that you did everything you could for him. You certainly are a fine example of a loving and kind daughter.
This month marks 20 years since I lost my father, and I can relate to the feelings you expressed. I have so many regrets. My mother was his caregiver and she was wonderful - and my sisters were there everyday to help in every way they could. I had a full time job at the time and lived a couple hours away, so I could not be there as much as I would have liked. I finally quit my job to be able to help care for my father, but it was too late - he died a week later. It hurts my heart even now to be telling someone this.
After all this time I still miss him dearly, and often wish I could just sit and talk to him. So I do understand to some small degree the pain you are feeling.That pain never goes away completely, but I found that it can be eased somewhat by hope. That is what happened to me when I read a brochure entitled "When Someone You Love Dies". It helped me to understand the stages of grief and that my feelings were normal. It also comforted me in the knowledge that my Dad is "sleeping" and that God has promised to awaken him one day to reunite him with us. I reread this brochure from time to time because there is so much comfort in it's contents. Perhaps you may find some comfort in it as well. I was able to find it on JW.org.
I am sending you my deepest condolences and will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. Sincerely, Linda